My boyfriend of 2 years often goes 24 hours without any form of communication to me, not even a quick text to say hi, good night or good morning. He has no children, no close friends or family, his job is low stress, and during these times he is not doing anything important except napping, watching tv or commuting between clients. I have expressed many times how important it is for me to stay connected to my significant other, and how long gaps (ie 12-24 hours) worry me or hurt me. Note that he lives 5 mins away and we see each other only about once a week due to our conflicting schedules.
But he continues to do it, when I try to open up to him gently that I am hurt by it, he gets really angry and frustrated with me. He talks down to me, says things that make me cry, and I often cry myself to sleep after. Then the next day he usually gives me the silent treatment. He's told me he doesn't think it's a "big deal", that I am just creating drama or that I am trying to control him. Outside of this, our communicationa are great. We are brief, happy and respectful of each other's time. But when he shuts me out like that unexpectedly , usually because he is in a bad mood, it hurts me, and it always leads to a problem. I have tried breaking up with him several times over this, he always seems to pull me back in by making me think that he will change.
I feel that I deserve someone who will treat me better and respect my feelings in this way. With technology being so easy, it would take two seconds to send a text just to say hello, good night or good morning , and it seems bizarre to me that he can't do that. I have tried being the one to text him in the past but that does nothing. In fact that seems to make it worse. I am an attractive woman, I take care of myself, I am fun, respectful, have a lot of friends and I am very committed when I am in a relationship. However, I have not dated very much as I was in a long-term marriage before him.
Most Helpful Girl
We're in the same boat sweetie. My boyfriend goes DAYS without messaging me and it really hurts. So I would say going a day without talking to your significant other is NOT acceptable. What's wrong with just texting a Hi or Good morning/ good night message. It just seems like he's not putting enough effort into the relationship and you're deserving of being a priority.