I've been single for 7 months now and have been on 3 dates with a great guy! I told him I didn't wanna rush things... then I panicked and did exactly that! I messaged asking what was going on between us and started admitting I was worried that he didn't want anything serious 😣 all my insecurities came out...
He's still talking to me *sigh of relief*
God knows why...
I have apologised and everything but I feel stupid. Now I'm waiting on the 4th date but at the moment he's broke cause he's getting contract work where he can until he starts his new job so he can't really do much in terms of activities!
So any advice? Do I step back and see if he asks me or just ask and risk appearing even more pushy again?
He told me he really enjoys my company and likes me but doesn't wanna rush things which is what I said too!
I'm just stressing waaay too much and making things worse...
Most Helpful Guy
I’ve heard of individuals doing worse than making the mistakes you’ve made overall in the new relationship you’re developing. Personally, I wouldn’t find you push, just anxious and nervous about the new relationship and there’s nothing wrong with that. We all get nervous. We all get anxious. You’ve apologized and taken a step back to regroup and that’s what you should have done given the circumstances, but now that’s past and you’re waiting on the first date. Perhaps you should practice a little bit of patience and given you already know about his financial situation, you should either in my view back off and just wait for him to come to you, or if you have the resources, there’d be nothing wrong with you being the bold one and asking him out instead. Let him know that it’d be your treat this time around. Personally, I would find it commendable for the girl I was dating to take such an initiative. Not only does it demonstrate her understanding of the situation overall, but she’s willing to pitch in when life is tough. That’s a person you know you can count on at your side when life is tough and hard and doesn’t just walk away because they aren’t getting all they want. It is your choice and you have to do what is going to make you the happiest, but you might consider stepping up and making the first move this time around. That’s my bottom line.0
Most Helpful Girl
Yeah you sound very unstable.
You can ask him out if you want. You two don't need to go out to a fancy restaurant n spend bunch money on a date... simply get a coffee or do something light. Or you can pay for the date this time.
If he tells you he's so busy/he doesn't have enough money to keep up.. so that he can't see you... that's a full of shit.
You guys still getting to know each other do not ever tell him that you worry about where you two go, if he's not taking you seriously, things out of your insecurity...
you don't want him to take you seriously after only 4 dates. You two still don't know eachother that well he cannot possibly be taking you seriously. He could like you, be interested. But NOT 'serious' yet.
after 5-6th date, there could be something about HIM that turns YOU off. Vice versa. So like you say, like he says, do not rush things. Don't expect anything the first 8-10th dates.. and consider it as more of hang out/get to know meet up than dating/relationship stuffs. Maybe thinking this way will help you get less nervous about the whole thing.
Do not ever show a guy insecurity side of you, or ask him where things go/are you taking this seriously stuffs only after few dates.. those will drive a guy away..0