Would you be offended if your boyfriend wanted to hang out with a girl that's hitting on him?

There's this girl that's been hanging around my boyfriend a lot lately. She's actually a friends with benifiets of one of his friends. In the last few weeks my boyfriend has been messaging her a lot and talking to this girl about my relationship to him. I find out today that he's asking her 'when's the next time they're going to hang' and he's saying 'asap' . I don't think he's the type to cheat but I don't trust the girl and I've told my boyfriend that I'm not crazy about him hang out with her. I'm thinking he must have told her I said that because now she likes everything he puts on Facebook. I don't want to be that girlfriend that says he can't be friend with this girl but it really bothers me. What do I do?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • He is out of line! He needs to stop that crap. If not, you can figure he is disrespecting you and likely will do something with her.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Guy-Girl friendships are always dangerous, there's eventually going to be tension, especially since they know it's not right, "forbidden fruit" and all that. He probably also likes the attention she's giving him.
    +She obviously wants him to dump you. You could be the sneaky bossy girlfriend and tell him he should hang out with you because you're more fun, then give him the best sex he's ever had (if you're sexually active already). Repeat that everytime he plans to hang out with her and buy a lot of lingerie lol.
    Or you could just drop him and save some time, tears and money, if he seems like he wants to cheat, he probably eventually will no matter what you do. Guys are jerks, sorry. :c

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What Guys Said 0

The only opinion from guys was selected the Most Helpful Opinion!

What Girls Said 19

  • Yes, this would definitely bother me... but, relationships do require trust so, tell him how you feel and that you are going to trust him if he continues hanging out with her, and if he cheats on you, it wasn't meant to be... it would really suck, but you have to trust him and if anything happens you will find out about it sooner or later. Just try to be the bigger person and maybe ask your boyfriend if you are allowed to hang out with whatever and how many ever guy friends you please and if he says he wouldn't be ok with it maybe he will realize he is not being fair and if not he is a hypocrite

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    • 1mo

      Except today he told her that they have so much in common and she's pretty atracttive. I found that in a Facebook message between the two of them today. So now there is no trust.

    • 1mo

      Break up with him girl, you don't deserve that! If he can't appreciate you, someone else will!

  • Squash that ASAP. Not cool. I wouldn't trust either of them. Your boyfriend is disrespecting you too by engaging in text... hanging out with her one on one if that is the case. In a group it might be different especially if her friend with benefits is there but regardless she is obviously a flirt and enjoys causing trouble for other people. Toxic person to have in your lives. Who needs that drama? Your boyfriend doesn't mind because she is giving him attention and he loves it. Reverse the situation and see how he feels about you talking and hanging out with a flirty guy friend. I guarantee he would have a fit.

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  • I would be incredibly hurt! And i don't think it's wrong for you to suggest that he not hang out with her. If he values your relationship over the friendship he's having with this girl, he will drop her. Talk to him rationally about it - tell him that you're HURT; not angry. Explain why this bothers you so much and ask him to put himself in your shoes. I guarantee he would not like the feeling if the situation were reversed.

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  • Well, I wouldn't particularly be happy about it but I wouldn't try to tell him that he's not allowed to go see her.

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    • 1mo

      Well what do I do then?

    • 1mo

      I guess just have another conversation with him. Explain how uncomfortable it makes you but at the same time realise that you're not his owner and he's allowed to do what he wants. Even if you did try to say he can't be friends with her, that wouldn't stop cheating, he'd still find a way to see her so you may as well try and trust that nothing's gonna happen because there's nothing you can do anyway.

    • 1mo

      Except today he told her that they have so much in common and she's pretty atracttive. I found that in a Facebook message between the two of them today.

  • That's tough I know what you mean about being "that" girlfriend but this seems like it's worthy of you doing something. What you and his living arrangements?

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  • Yes of course if we're exclusive I would get pissed off.

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  • How long ya been together?

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    • 1mo

      Almost 2 years.

    • 1mo

      Yeah, this chick is bad news. Keep her away from him. But you need to talk with him. Why does he need to see her asap? That's suspicious. You need to get to the bottom of this.

  • I've never been in a relationship so my advice my not be great. If she is starting to talk more and more with him and acting flirty then that's opening a door that could hurt you and possibly end the relationship. If he does love you and is a loyal boyfriend then nothing will happen. It sounds like you trust him, but just don't trust her. So tell him that if you want to talk to him about it.

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    • 1mo

      Except today he told her that they have so much in common and she's pretty atracttive. I found that in a Facebook message between the two of them today.

    • 1mo

      You need to talk to him

  • Yes if he allows me to see all the guys that's hitting on me too. I doubt it.

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  • Yes that would annoy me.

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  • You're doing your part as a girlfriend. Tell him it bothers you, the trust him with his actions. If, and I love you if, you think he's cheating on you, know it's not your fault. If not, then you have gone through a frustrating time and that's something to be proud of.

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  • Tell him it bothers you and that it makes you uncomfortable. That might help

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  • Dude she needs to back off. Tell her off. I wouldn't trust her either.

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  • Hello yeah I would. You need to evaluate and test this man. He might not be the guy you thought he was

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  • Yes, she will try to ruin your relationship. Iknow this because of personal experience.

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  • I'd fucking kill him. Collect the life insurance policy and smile sweetly as usual 😈

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  • I would be super bothered by that.

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  • ok first of all teling her off seems like a childish thing to do , she isn't doing anything , is she blightenly sitting on him or being nasty to you? As a adult if anything happens let it , dont be that girl who shoots the gun an turns out you was wrong. So what if she like his posts, HE IS WITH U. and the girls before this post stop giving poor advice choices of being plain nasty. How about u actually get to know her rather than be mean... seriously where is the adultism.

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    • 1mo

      Except today he told her that they have so much in common and she's pretty atracttive. I found that in a Facebook message between the two of them today.

  • Same thing happened to me, i told my partner to choose me or her. He ignored me and went to her house baring in mind she's right across the road on the same street and he was going to hers everyday. So i said to him we were over because she kept flirting with him constantly and he knew it but didn't care about my feelings so i went out got drunk and kissed someone else (not proud and dont condone it) few days later i told him and then he finally decided to choose me and we got bac k together. Everyone found out she was a spiteful cow and now no one likes her (not my doing) we now have a beautiful baby together lol!

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