Did he lose interest or is he playing hard to get?

Ok so there's this guy i work with "john" and we've been friends for about 4 months but i only saw john as a friend altho he would flirt with me all the time, i sort of rejected john. But then the guy i was seeing at the time ended and john asked me to hang out, the first time i said no and then regretted it and told johns friend i would like to hang out, then they invited me and it was a group of people we work with. (2 other people) the next time i saw him he gave me his number but i thought we were just friends so i told him about this guy who just rejected me, and then ever since that john stopped texting me and sends really short messgaes, where as before they were long and he responded right away. I asked him to hang out a few days later and it took him awhile but he got back to me and we did, but this time with his close friends and it was really fun but a week has gone by and he hasn't texted me at all. What should i do?


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What Guys Said 0

No guys shared opinions.

What Girls Said 3

  • I don't think he lost interest, but he's not playing hard to get either.
    He obviously is distancing himself from you because you just told him about the other guy who just rejected you... Obviously he thinks you are not interested in him. I think you are the one who's making the situation between you two more complicated and confused.
    If I were him I wouldn't even bother hanging out with you.. I would have just cut the contact and moved on. But since he hung out with you, I guess he still has feelings for you. He probably thought you wanted to hang out as friends.
    You should text him first and show him that you are interested. Otherwise I don't think he's going to text you first,, or make any move since you already turned him down once and told him about the other guy.

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    • 1mo

      What should i say to him? I dont even know what to say

    • 1mo

      Should i tell him that i like him?

  • Never text a dude about another dude unless they are forrrrrr sureeeee your dudefriend that you drink beer with and watch the game. Otherwise yes, that person is most likely into you. You need to take the initiative now and ask him to hangout and let it be known.
    But it will be more difficult cause you told a guy that probably thought y'all we talking about another dude. So now you kind of look like you don't just talk to one, you talk to more and that's a turn off for men to actually hear (they know it in there head but they don't want to admit it). Absolutely don't talk about other dudes with him at all. Even celebrity crushes for right now.

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    • 1mo

      Yeah i agree completely... The only thing is he apparently has an internet girlfriend like a thousand miles away he doesn't even know... So i wouldn't want to ask him on a date. And the last time we hung out i was the one who asked him... But i didn't hug him or anything which definitely threw him off...

    • 1mo

      That's good! You should be respectful of this 'internet girl friend' I say that with my eyebrows all disheveled... you could technically out maneuver her... but I wouldn't suggest it. Just stay friends with him. Don't give him physical contact beside maybe brushing up against his arm, or grabbing it (softly and just for a second) when you laugh at his jokes. ALL other (even hugging) should be not happen. This will give him subtle hints that will attract him to you but also give off an 'innocent' vibe. Because women have no idea what they are doing when they do that ;) By not having any other physical contact you are respecting that relation while also making your intentions know sub consciously with him. Its like a jedi mind trick!

  • It sounds like he feels a bit rejected by you, maybe he's feeling a bit hurt, or maybe he isn't sure if you actually do like him. Male pride can be tricky, you could reach out and send him a message, asking if he'd like to go on a date with you, and maybe explain that you got your wires crossed and you didn't realise he liked you as more than a friend. Good luck!

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