This guy asked me to go to my favorite restaurant but I asked him to pick one... then he said it will put him pressure... we've been hanging out wz a few people but never been out just 2 of us.
- Yes60% (46)
- No40% (31)
Most Helpful Guy
Of course it does.
He probably has no idea what you like to eat, and he probably likes things that you don't care for and vice versa. Further, if he's trying to pick a "nice" restaurant (and not a local family chain like Olive Garden or Outback Steakhouse or Red Lobster), they're often quite specialized with a limited menu, and it might be something you hate, or (he'll be afraid that) you might be insulted somehow by choosing something that is inappropriate for some reason.
Maybe he chooses a steakhouse, and doesn't know you're vegan. Maybe he chooses a fish place and you're allergic. Maybe he chooses Mexican and you hate Mexican.
Some girls take this kind of thing in stride and say "oh, that would be nice, but could we choose something else?", but some girls get all offended and pissed off if you suggest the wrong thing.
(Now, myself, I'd rather her get pissed off, because then I know she isn't for me, and wouldn't have to waste my time and money on her in the first place - but many guys have SUCH a hard time asking girls out in the first place that a rejection like that could crush them and undermine their confidence for YEARS.)
This is why I tell everyone: don't do a dinner date until at LEAST the third date, and don't do a FANCY dinner date until the 10th or later date or until you're in a relationship. The first couple of dates should be CHEAP or FREE, and should focus on having lots of "get to know you" time to talk about COMPATIBILITY. By the time you ask a girl on a dinner date, you should ALREADY KNOW WHAT SHE LIKES TO EAT. If you don't, then you aren't ready for a dinner date.
Having to make all the decisions is stressful, and it forces the guy to "put his neck out there" because it's so easy for her to shoot down his decisions - usually without her even offering an alternative suggestion. BUT... - guys, girls still WANT you (the guy) to make those decisions - THE GIRL DOES NOT WANT TO BE THE ONE MAKING DECISIONS in most cases - so if you go ahead and make the decisions, and make them well (taking her needs into consideration, that you made an effort to learn beforehand), you will earn BIG points with her!0