What to do, now that he has stopped communicating?

I have been long distance dating a guy for over a year and a half. I returned from my last visit to where he lives about 8 weeks ago. Since then, we have only text once, and facetimed once - both of which i initiated. I decided to let him initiate contact, as i didn't want to chase - that was 5 weeks ago. Aside from binge liking a few of my IG posts, he hasn't tried to make contact. We weren't in "relationship" per say, but 18months is pretty long, and to just stop making effort feels disrespectful. I feel to just cut him off, but at the same time, thats allowing him to take the cowards way out. Any advice?


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  • Honestly, I think you should just be straightforward and call him out on it. Just message him and say something like, "hey I've noticed how you haven't really seemed to be messaging me all too much, I understand that you're a busy person and all but you could make a bit of time to send your girlfriend a quick message couldn't you? I understand if you've lost interest in me as that's normal in relationships, but I'd just like you to be honest and straightforward with me so that I can understand what is going on. I'm just confused on why you aren't really initiating anything and how we haven't talked in a while, I'm taking it as signs of disinterest. If this isn't the case you should just let me know otherwise I'll cease contacting you and move on." Something very straightforward like that will make it so that he really can't dodge around the topic without it being blaringly obvious, so it puts him under a bit more pressure to just give you an honest answer (which is what you need!). You also need to be very straightforward yourself so that he knows how serious you are about this, because you don't deserve to have your time and patience played and wasted like this! So you should be direct and let him know that this isn't okay with you. This method is probably the easiest that there is available for you right now. Go get your honest answer from him! You can do it! :)

  • He is not interested in the slightest, cut him off before you spend anymore $ and emotion trying to hold on to this relationship.

  • I understand why you can't just ask him what's up? It's not gonna make you look weak or desperate, it's good communication. It doesn't matter your status, but I don't know your guy's agreement or how you two are and how long you've seen/visited each other... But regardless, ask him! If you've been seeing him for 18 months that's a lot and you shouldn't feel like you can't just talk to him like that!

    • I don't understand*

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    • You do deserve an explanation. You never know what could be going on... But regardless, I encourage you to ask him what's up... Otherwise you will always wonder. It's been 5 weeks... Way too long! Just ask him you've got nothing to lose

    • Thanks so much :)