I'm 20 and never had a boyfriend- is it honestly because I'm not slim?

I'm not very overweight but I haven't got your stereotypically 'hot' body, like I'm curvy but I'm also a bit chubby. I have it in my mind that when I'm slim my love life will be sorted 😂
Is this honestly true? Like even my mom said I would have more success if I were slim 😂
I'm just sick of being single tbh aha

  • Yes, it's possibly the main reason
    21% (7)26% (11)24% (18)Vote
  • No, it doesn't make that much difference
    79% (26)74% (31)76% (57)Vote
And you are? I'm a GirlI'm a Guy

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Most Helpful Guy

  • That's absolutely not the reason Alex, you're a sweet person and that's what counts :D
    One thing you could think about is what you've been wearing on dates. If you dress up too sexy, people will look too much as your body and you'll interest the wrong type of guy :o
    If you dress up conservatively, like long pants and boots, he'll focus on you as a person. Maybe that can help :D
    It will work out Alex, no matter if it takes some time :D

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Most Helpful Girl

  • You're extremely beautiful and I remember you from your old account you're not fat so I don't know it's weird... I'm 21 and never had boyfriend either Hahahah
    It's mostly the attitude, I don't let guys get close to me and I reject them, maybe it's the same thing with you?

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    • 1mo

      Aw thank you :) so are you by the way :)
      Well I don't let guys get anywhere sexually with me, so it could also be that. Most guys I meet want to rush things in that sense whereas I'd rather wait

    • 1mo

      Two good girls. I wish we had more who thought that way.

What Guys Said 32

  • Fuck these guys saying it's the main reason lmao. They don't know shit. I know girls who are chubby/overweight and have had more sexual partners /significant others than Charlie Sheen (nothing bad about that lol.) Anyway it's not like you're gonna slim down and all your problems disappear. Work on yourself as a person and become the person you want to be - that's when you'll find someone you want to have. There are a bunch of people your age who doesn't have boyfriends/girlfriends and I bet there are people who just don't have the guts to approach you either.

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  • Alex when you get slim that doesn't mean your problems will go away

    it means your problems will adapt to new ones

    think of all the hot girls who have problems with finding the right guy for them. sure they could get a good fuck any day of the week but ultimately that's not their end goal.

    you keep doing you and reach the best possible version of yourself.

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  • Having a stereotypical "hot" body would come with it's difficulties too... That tends to attract the worst guys out there who would do anything, including playing with your emotions, to get with you for a night. I know a lot of attractive women who have expressed how their looks tend to attracted total jerks.

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    • 1mo

      I have that now though, most guys I date just want to sleep with me and that's it :/

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    • 1mo

      @timbarn no I don't let them sleep with me.

    • 1mo

      Well it's probably not your figure because I like many other guys, prefer a fuller-figured woman. Perhaps it is indeed your approach. Many guys, when they first start dating a woman, just want to have fun. They don't want to be bothered by all of the pressure of settling down, they just want to meet someone that is fun. After a couple of dates he will really want to fool around, but this doesn't have to include all out sex. The important thing is that he grows to like and respect you, the love part will grow in time.

  • i doubt that's the reason... i know people far more overweight and far less attractive than you (presuming that's you in the picture) who had bf's at 20

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  • WB :) You're attractive and your face is maturing in a good way. A bit chubby is not ideal, but what is ideal? Men are pretty forgiving, so I don't think that's your problem. It's something else. But without studying your every movement, one can only speculate...

    I somehow imagine you're meeting clumsy hopeless tools too, or guys that only want sex. No offense or anything, but women usually have pretty abysmal taste :P

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    • 1mo

      Also, at 20, you're at the height of your power over men. We find pretty much all 20 year old women attractive. It's not that you're not attractive enough.

      What's the dynamics or relationships you have with men. What's your relationship with your father like? Could point to some clues?

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    • 1mo

      Maybe part of you 'plays' with guys you're not really interested in? If you can get their attention, it's a kind of validation that you were seeking from your father? But of course, I'm just speculating, as always :)

      Anyway, your new pic reminds me a little of Taylor Swift :)

    • 1mo

      Perhaps :/ I always like talking to the guys I'm speaking to though, even if it's not in the romantic sense. With that said, their attention is a bonus 😂
      Haha thanks!! I've recieved that compliment a lot lately 😛

  • Personally I just think it's the guys that ask you out, from what you've told me over time they just weren't right for you.

    And I don't think it's your body or anything and honestly if you just eat right and exercise it's pretty easy to lose weight.

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  • I don't think I've ever had a girlfriend that could be defined as "slim".

    Just not a body type that I'm into.

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  • Honestly, face wise, you're pretty cute and lots of guys like girls with curves. Its all about confidence. I've been out with my friends and we will se a bunch of slim girls and their slightly "larger" friend. The slim girl may look "hotter" but the bigger girl is usually packing a lot more in the front side and the backside. Just be confident with your body. If not, then hit the gym but you don't have to be slim to look attractive..

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  • do you go out a lot, flirt a lot, make yourself a move if there is an interesting guy? Only if you do that a lot then you should start thinking if it might have something to do with your looks or personality.

    you have a pretty face and if you are not overweight by much then it most likely has nothing to do with it.

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  • If that's you in your profile pic... it's not your looks! You're super cute! I don't know why you never had a boyfriend tho. It's a damn shame! I'll date you ^_^

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  • I'm not going to participate in the poll. I want a women that I'm in relationship with to be a fit shape but I expect the same from myself. If you are curvy that's not bad. Your real, because what society says is hot is unrealistic.
    Yes apprentice matters but personality, integrity, and intelligence matter as well.

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  • Not all men are slim either.

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  • But you are bloody beautiful and many girls would kill to have your face. You just need confidence I guess. Remember: There's a time for everything. It will happen when it is meant to happen.

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  • It's very possible. Looks is what opens the doors. If guys don't find you attractive, they won't approach.

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  • generally guys (8 out of 10) like curvy girls not too chubby (like those love handles screaming out) so i think that wouldn't be the reason or as the saying goes "the fruit of patience is sweet" 😅 hope you'll get a good boyfriend soon!

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  • You've got a beautiful face, and you're from the UK; provided your not obese i don't mind girls with a bit more 'meat' to them

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  • There are lots of guys who prefer your figure. You have a cute face so appearance is not the reason.

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  • Alex! oi mate, sounds like we need to have another chat man

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  • No, i love you the way you are doll 💋

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  • No definitely not. You probably haven't let guys in because you feel that way.

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  • Its probably one of the reasons, but certainly not the only or even main, reason. There are other reasons that you're single that can't be solved by weight loss.

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  • I prefer ladies with a little meat on their bones..

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  • Hun you are fine

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  • If that's you in the picture your lack of dating has nothing to do with your looks
    You're very fine

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    • 1mo

      Haha it is, thanks :p I'm a nice person though so I don't get what's wrong with my personality 😂

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    • 1mo

      But the guys I do go on dates with never goes anywhere 😂
      Thanks though :)

    • 1mo

      I got nothing. You seem nice and you're a looker, maybe just date more but in my opinion there's nothing wrong w you :)

  • No that's not possible. Looks don't matter for girls.

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  • Judging by your picture I don't it's the main reason.

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    • 1mo

      Lol is that meant to be an insult to my face? 😂😂

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    • 1mo

      *a common reason for staying single as a girl is that you seem unapproachable

    • 1mo

      I'm always smiling in person

  • There's a lot more that goes towards attraction than that.

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  • be a good girl

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  • Soo not very slim or fat?

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  • Same here I've been single for a long time

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  • More from Guys
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What Girls Said 16

  • Girl your weight isn't even bad what are you talking bout😂 home girl, don't worry bout a man, get your dough up and love yourself more. Guys even at your age aren't always that serious in relationships. The right man will come, be glad you ain't fucking with puppies right now.

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  • It could be your attitude or lack of confidence. Big girls can find guys, too. Also, it could be your standards. Maybe you're attracted to the type that isn't attracted to your type. Me, personally, I go to the gym and am trying to straighten out my diet and I'm a normal size. I expect the very same from my partner and if they were chubby and not into it, I wouldn't be with them and the way you look is a big neon sign to guys the type of lifestyle you might have.

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  • One of the sexiest women I ever met was a size 18 and she felt so isolated by her weight that she went to male prostitutes rather than look out for a boyfriend. She was very fetishistic and loved sexual intercourse with a passion. I think she just didn't want the commitment that a boyfriend would represent.

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  • I'm very slim, 20 and never had a boyfriend either so I can almost guarantee you it's not that ahah

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  • I've always thought that about myself too. Until I found a guy who likes me just as I am. Weirdly, it makes me want to try to improve myself a little more now because it would be fun to sort of reward him for loving me for me first.

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  • I really don't think so. Like you said, you're not fat, and there's plenty of guys who are into thicker women. MAybe you jus don't hang out with the righ people :D

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  • No, not all guys like slim women. from the looks of it, you're pretty to me so being curvy has nothing to do with it. You could be slim with a bad personality and not get any guys so it isn't just only about how you look

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  • im thick but your weight shouldn't be the main reason that your single if you feel that way then put some effort into losing weight but guys that go for stick figure girls are guys that just want slim stick figure type girls but guys also like a girl with meat on her bones so just do you don't care what your mom or other people are telling you tbh your mom when she said that was being extremely rude

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  • No way. You're gorgeous.

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  • I have high standards so I just don't date anybody

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  • fat girls get boyfriends too, no it's not the looks

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  • It probably has nothing to do with your appearance. You're pretty. If you meet those men through tinder and/or other applications, it's more than obvious that they are not looking for anything serious. They just want to get laid.

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  • I'm slim and I'm also 20 years old but I've never had a boyfriend. The reason why I never had a boyfriend is because I'm not attractive and no one wants to go out with me (it sucks). I don't think this is the reason why you're single and I've seen different kinds of girls who have boyfriends. You will but I don't think it's time.

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  • I don't know why your mom would say that lmao. Sadly enough the world we live in can be like that. I have fluctuated in weight over the years a lot and definitely get treated better when I'm slimmer. But that being said it shouldn't play a roll in whether or not you have had a boyfriend. Men love all shapes and sizes of women. Some of my most attractive guy friends are married to larger women. (Not saying you're large just giving an example) i totally get what you mean about thinking your life will be better when you lose weight and in all honesty... It's somewhat true. I'm always happier when I'm thinner. Like I said, the shallow world just treats you better. The right guy will come along don't worry. I haven't had a boyfriend for probably 3 years now. I'm starting to really want one. I got depressed and fat again though lmao so I'm trying to slim down. Long story short if you think being slimmer will make you happier then it probably will and in that case get going!! You can do it but try to be happy on your journey. The way I think of it is "this will be the last fat body I ever have so I'm going to enjoy it and remember it while I can because very soon my body will be totally different.

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  • My friend is overweight but she has boyfriend. So thats not the real deal.

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  • you're 20 relax

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