Should I be worried if my guy doesn't text me regularly or texts me back after hours?

Hi all, I met this guy online and he came to my city and invited me for dinner.. he said he had great time and invited me for lunch the next day before he went back home... the thing with this guy is that he said he doesn't pay much attention to his phone.. so whenever i text him or reply to his text.. i have to wait for at least 2 hours before he texts me back or call me.. I don't know if a this stage of our relationship, i should get mad at him.. and if it is normal in a relationship... It really gets on my nerve I dont know how to deal with him.. I m not even sure if he is serious and wants to be in a relationship with me or that was just casual dating.. help me!!


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Most Helpful Guy

  • He should be proactive and he should be responding. However, some people are not good at that. The question is not how quickly he responds to the first text in your chain, but how quickly responds to the rest. For instance, you send a text, he does reply for a few hours, you text back to his reply... How quickly is he responding now? If its quick I don't think you have a lot to worry about, but if he responds slowly even it a conversation, that is not good.

    That all being said, you have the right to the response that makes you happy. If this guy is non responsive and that is important to you, find someone who thinks that important too. Talk to him. Give him a chance. But, if he will not give you what you need to be happy, walk away.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • I find it annoying men who text bck so long. A man that really enjoys talking to and who want to be with you would not text bck so long. He probably has someone else and doesn't want to get to attached to you. I find it odd when he txts bck hours later. That means that he is controlling the relationship. I honestly would cut him off, he will not get better but worse. If a guy doesn't show me the attention I want. No worries... cut him off and won't contact him anymore. I dont waste anytime. Do it now before u won't get so attached.

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What Guys Said 4

  • A: You went on two dates (back to back) and already you are in a relationship? B: Not everyone is glued to their phone. I stay busy socially and professionally and my phone has a ton of notifications on a daily basis. If I have been seeing someone for awhile and I am really into her, then I will be responding more frequently and make her more a priority. You have only been out with this guys twice and already you seem annoyed that he isn't making you a priority. That's needy and is a sure method to run any guy or girl off.

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    • 1mo

      Well thank you for answering me.. and you re right we havn't reached that point yet in the relationship ( that is actually the main question here) still since nothing is for serious how should I act : ignore him let him initiate all the convo since he wouldn't be that responsive if I do it.. should I act like Im indifferent and not show Im interested in him and eventually let him go... or should I get mad and tell him straight forward about it?

    • 1mo

      Absolutely not the third option. If you've gotten nothing so far, then you should move forward as if nothing is going to happen. People often make the mistake of thinking that reducing pressure, or turning nothing into something requires an action, or something we actively do to make something happen. This is actually counterproductive and the assumption many make is that the person of interest on the other side has the same level of interest/involvement that they have. Don't make that assumption. It leads to one sided interest and potentially to obsession. Not healthy. Do yourself a favor and focus on other things that enhance/boost your own happiness (not things that have to do with/involve/lead to him. If he misses you and makes more of an effort, treat it as a bonus and think about how you want to respond then. In the meantime, enjoy the options of single life. It's supply and demand. The less options you have (supply) the more invested in one person you will be (demand).

  • Well you're not actually in a relationship yet..

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  • Not the guy for you

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  • Yeah that dude is with another chick

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What Girls Said 1

  • It means that you're not his priority. If guy wants to talk to you, he will always find time.

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    • 1mo

      For how long? I mean he can't be initiating all the time ( calling and texting all the time ) it s known for a fact that guys can't always do that and get easily distracted and us girls need attention mostly ( that s what I think )

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