Should I speak to girl I liked before and tell her what I think/feel? *NEED PROPER OPINIONS PLEASE**?

I was talking to a girl a few months ago, we got on well and seemed to like each other, she's apparently very shy and seems the type to be caught up so much in her own thoughts, possibly meaning self esteem issues? The thing is, she was very on/off with me we'd kissed and spoke a lot so I was sure she was into me but whenever I tried to get her out she was busy yet she'd still talk to me so I called her out on it and said if she wasn't going to follow through with her words to leave and she said she wanted to see me etc yet still never.. so a few weeks later I called her out on it again and basically said to her that I felt like she had her guard up (previous bf's, childhood issues, confidence?) and she got pretty defensive about it then said she just doesn't want a boy in her life.. which to be honest gave me a little relief at the time cause I felt like for once I knew where I stood yetthe thing is I still have a feeling all is not what it seems.. at one point because the on/off stuff I started talking to her and she said "you're talking a lot tonight I like it" and other things that would suggest she did like me, the only time I actually got her to come out was when she was already out and had a few drinks so that points it to me that she's nervous in some way hence not coming out when I've tried to make plans "sober", what I want to know is because I've just met her again at a mutual friends party, I do still like her and we were talking at the party is wether I should say all this to her, basically I feel as if she liked me but was too nervous/shy to follow up with it for whatever reasons, wether it be fear of getting hurt or whatever, I just feel like I've got stuff to say because I did feel lead but I do still like her so I'm confused as to what to do.. also I'm sure one of her friends said to me she goes through stages of withdrawal from her friends which is basically what she done with me as well, any insight on the info I've given and advice would be great


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What Girls Said 1

  • I don't think you should bother with her anymore. She is clearly not interested in you, so you would be wasting your time.


What Guys Said 1

  • Ok, yeah it does sound like all is not right there. From what you have said, and the conversation with her friend, maybe she has some confidence issues, mild depression etc. My advice would be, if you really want something with her, to keep putting yourself out there to her. If someone has these types of issues it is easy for them to push people away and think they are not wanted. This is why the you may be struggling to get the connection going because she has her walls up.
    Maybe only time and 'being there' will progress this and, at the end of the day if you try, and try again, but she is not willing to see you, just move on. This would be a shame but sometimes things are not meant to be.

    • Thanks, I've always thought the same. I just remembered one of her friends said she got really f*cked over by a previous boyfriend which would in my opinion explain some of this.. I seen her at the weekend and asked her how she was and she said something along the lines of "yeah good since you deleted me off everything" in a certain tone of voice, she also went and bought me a drink as soon as I seen her as well though I don't want to read into that as more than plain friendliness.. tbh I think she's a great girl so I'm thinking of just shooting her a message sometime this week though I'm a little hesitant because of the last time though I know I don't I'll regret and I've nothing to lose anyway, of all the girls around who I could get with there's just something about this one that has me so curious.. thanks for the advice I appreciate it anymore would be welcomed. :)