What to do now I think I really messed up?

So I have been seeing this guy for about 3 months now. He lives about 2 hours away for me. I was at his house this weekend and I have been feeling that these is something going on. So I checked his phone. I did fine something and I comforted him. I also told him that I looked at his phone. I know I was wrong for checking his phone and I was no different than him I violated his trust. I want to try to work through this but not sure how to go about it. I texted him and apologized for my actions and he said he forgave me and he asked for my forgiveness also. He always calls me in the morning on his way to work and he didn't call me this morning so I texted him "Missed my phone call this morning, and I know you are disappointed with me. I just need to know if I'm, us are worth working through this. I'm a wreck over all of this and have a very hard time. I'm sitting in the parking lot crying not knowing what to do. If you could just let me know something." he responded this " I'm sorry, I just drove up. I did miss our call too.. felt odd not talking to you. I'm just being careful... and taking a moment and deep breath. I really care about you and it hurts me knowing you are hurting. Hope you have a great day". So my question is what do i do... do I just wait to see if he contacts me? should I ask him if there is something I can do to help him trust me again? any advice will be great...

I know he was wrong but why do I feel like I'm the one who should be ask for forgiveness... He should be the one who's trying to explain.. I just feel so overwhelmed with this.
Update: My boyfriend has been calling be every morning and evening just like before we had this misunderstanding. We talk like nothing had happen so I texted him the other night... " I don't want to push but we need to talk about our relationship and where do you see us. Do you see us exclusive or not there yet? I feel we also need to talk about what happen Sunday. I know you weren't ready tonight to talk and to be honest I wasn't either still trying to process things. Hopefully we can two.


What Guys Said 2

  • You just sorta have to rebuild what was there and that will take time. So far sounds like nothing permanent was done so next time you see each other make sure you give him a big hug.

    • Thanks, what about what he did should I just forget about that?

    • Show All
    • I know if it was me I would be trying everything to explain my actions to him... He's acting like he is the one who was cheated on. I know what I did was very wrong and I abused the trust he had in me but I just looked at his phone. He was seeing another woman... I think that's a little worst. If he really cared as he said in his text he would be trying to explain.. I'm just really confused and getting angry.

    • I wouldn't feel too guilty about you did if I were you! You trusted your gut that something just wasn't right, and it was TRUE!!! Don't let him guilt trip too far! He is basically spinning this around and putting a guilt trip on you in order to hide what he is doing. Don't let him make you think he did nothing wrong and you did!

  • What did you find? Was it small enough to put aside and continue the relationship?


What Girls Said 1

  • Why does he need to trust you again, seems he done wrong.
    All this emotional needinesss telling him you're a wreck etc is very off putting for guys and it's putting you at a disadvantage.
    Show that you are a strong woman that doesn't need him and he is the one who should be coming after you. DO NOT contact him-He already told you he analysing so leave him be to gather his thoughts.

    • Thank you... you are right. It just seem these days guys are such player. why can't a guy just be real.. I just need to focus on what he did not what I did.

    • Show All
    • he answer me and said he was taking a step back and gathering his though... but he still call's me every morning just like nothing is wrong. Should I just see where this goes or walk away?

    • Up to you but you already put yourself in the weaker position and making it worse by pressuring him to talk and throwing words like commitment around-He already shown he wasn't willing to commit when he's going out with other women. Just because he calls you every morning means nothing.