How to get over fear of rejection?

I'd love to hang out with my crush, but I don't know if he likes me back. I realize that I probably have to make the first move if I want to find out, but I'm terrified of being rejected. I've never dated anyone before, so I don't know how to act and I don't want it to be awkward if he says no. Any advice?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • The way to get over it is to ask yourself what's the worst that could happen? If you ask him and he says no, will the sun still come out tomorrow? Will your family still love you? Will your dog still lick your face when you get home?

    You only live once. This isn't something dangerous, or something that is going to change the course of your whole life. It's a chance to get to know someone better, someone who you really don't even know much about yet.

    Think of it this way. This guy is lucky to get a chance to meet you. You are doing him a favor.

    And he isn't Superman, he's only a human being. He too will be a little uncomfortable, probably flattered, and maybe if you are lucky already interested in you too. Either way if he is a guy worth getting to know, he will be nice to you even if he isn't interested in going that that far.

    If he is rude, mean or disrespectful of your sincere and nice approach, he's not someone you want to be with anyway and you didn't lose anything.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Everyone has been rejected and noone likes it but its just how life is. Its not fair and you can't always have what you want. But just remember if he does reject you then oh well. There are so many guys out here. He is one compared to the thousands of guys in your area who probably have more to offer than him.

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What Guys Said 19

  • First, in life, you are much better off if you learn to accept rejection as a fact of life. If you don't take the risk of asking him, you will continue wondering and will never have him. If you ask and he says no, you will not have to keep wondering. If he says yes, you are getting what you want. When a person says no to another person, it doesn't mean they hate or dislike everything about you. It just means that they are not interested in dating you. It doesn't mean you are not pretty enough or popular enough, etc. The worst part of rejection is what we turn it into in our heads. As far as how to approach him, don't do it when you are having sex! bring it up when doing something else and make sure there will be no interruptions. Tell him your thoughts and see where it goes. The most important thing is to "just be you"! If we play games with those we are interested in, we run the risk of losing them when they see that is what you did. You can open by saying this is difficult for me, but I wanted to ask if you would like to go out with me. Make the first time you go out a fun date that doesn't leave you both alone together, at least until the evening is near the end. You can then, if you enjoyed it, tell him you had a good time and would like to do it again sometime. If he says yes, you are a happy girl. During the first date, make it about the fun, not about if he likes you or not. Men tend to not like being asked that too much and it makes the girl sound desperate. Just be you and see where it goes. If you pretend to be who you are not, it will come out later and can really ruin a potentially good relationship. Personally, I don't like people who pretend to be something else so they can impress someone. It always comes back to bite you.

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  • Create a plan, a scenario, and wait for your best chance. Try doing it in a private setting so no one else will see you - if have social anxiety or something of that nature. Whether things might be awkward in the future cannot be predicted yet because we don't know what his reaction will be. If he says "No" then try to act cool as if it never happened. Be friendly about it. It's better to try and have a chance than to not try and never have a chance. And you will gain some experience in approaching guys and asking them out. Experience is very important for your future. If he says "Sure" then BAM! You got your chance and you move forward to the next step.
    Good luck

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  • Rejection ain't the end of the world, it's always a possibility. It's just worse to regret for not having done anything. I've already regretted and been rejected and I say that I prefer to be rejected a thousand times than to regret once.

    Well, maybe this helps you too, I wrote it hours after my last rejection: www.girlsaskguys.com/.../a28863-the-5-pros-of-rejection-tomorrow-s-a-new-day

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  • You have to learn to take rejection it's the fact that you tried to do something about then not do anything at all that matters believe me don't walk away from a situation always looking back and thinking why did I not approach my crush etc

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  • If you don't go for it, you'll never know. Ever hear of Schrödinger's cat?

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  • Well, the only way we can get over the fear of rejection is take that step.
    Send him a text message and say you really like him and wanted to know
    if he like to go have a pop or go to movie with you or invite him to your place
    and order a pizza and pop.

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  • Just accept that everyone can be rejected. If it happens consider moving on.

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  • A little information about your relationship would help. Without it I can only say this - if he says no then accept it. Sometimes it happens. You can't control if they like you back.

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  • Go through the rejection and realise how it feels like to be the average male in today's society and how women have more rights than men.

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  • Gotta learn how to just deal with the awkwardness of rejection and understand it's them, not you.

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  • You have to realize that you're better than most people. Only way to do that is to become better than most people.

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  • I feel the same way pink anon, like literally verbatim scenario lol

    we just end up looking at eachother all class I don't know what to do about it, she sits next to 2 guys she talks a lot so im like nahhh

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  • Keep doing what you're afraid of. I'm still working on it.

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  • rejection is an unfortunate painful part of life-- but its better to get rejected than not to try at all

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  • You need to get rejected a few times before you'll shrug it off.

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  • What's "no" but a word?

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    • 22d

      I understand that it wouldn't be the end of the world if he said no, but I would feel weird seeing him all the time after. At the same time, I don't want to miss my chance so I dk what to do

    • 22d

      Then just try. You're making this awkward for me on GaG! Think of me?

  • Move on to the next guy if it doesn't work out.

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  • Just remember you'll never know how they feel if you don't ask. in my opinion rejection is better than constant wondering and confusion.

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  • If he says no, he says no. It's not the end of the world, and he's not rejecting you personally because he doesn't actually know you.

    If he says no, it will be because of some minor crazy reason that you could not have predicted and never have prevented.

    The odds are far more likely he will say yes, you will hang out, and enjoy yourself.

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