Why do I feel so bad after such a clean break?

I am 20 and female and there is a 27 year old guy who I've known for three months now that has expressed romantic interest in me. I'm just starting college, I grew up very sheltered with strict parents. He's older and looking to settle down with a family, he's traveled more than me, done with school, he's basically been there done that. He's really sweet and he could be my soul mate, we have so much in common and we get along really well. The first problem with all this is: he lives in London and I live in South Africa so that's a huge distance to maintain a relationship across. The second problem is: I have zero adulting experience, I have never dated, never lived alone, never done the night clubs or school dances (homeschooled). Thirdly: I'm not attracted to him and also I am incredibly immature and self-centered. He told me tonight that he likes me and asked if I return the feelings, which I don't, I told him I'm too immature to handle a long distance relationship and that I don't think I'm able to be what he wants; he wants a family I want to travel solo, he wants to stay on in London and I can't do that to my family. Now I feel horrible for turning him down because he is genuinely a nice guy and I know he has no luck with women because they don't consider him attractive. Should I feel like this with how cleanly I put the wall up? Especially considering he said he understood and didn't have hard feelings?


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What Guys Said 1

  • Well hmmm he had no link with women cause your and other women don't find him attractive... physically...

    It's true I guess that physical attraction is necessary... Duhh poor guy...

    Anyways there is no value of niceness anyways... So why bother? Just move on

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