Would you date down?

So i am currently seeing a woman that well many people around us seem to think is below me. In our culture other peoples opinions weigh heavily so while i enjoy being with her it does make it very difficult when i know how other people judge her and myself. So my question for you is how do you deal with dating someone that society feels is below you?


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What Girls Said 14

  • I don't believe in this whole concept that humans have monetary value.

    Do you like her?
    Does she make you happy?
    Are you attracted to her?

    Then who cares? They're not dating her, she isn't a clearance product at Walmart, she's a human being.

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  • It depends on what you mean by down.
    Less rich than my family? Sure
    Earns less money than I do? Sure
    Is less attractive than me? Sure, as long as I find him attractive
    Is less intelligent than me? Mmmm I would prefer not. But why not.
    Is less respectable? NOPE. I want a honorable man.

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    • 18d

      Sounds reasonable enough thanks for you opinion

  • Um... that's an awfully restrictive view to take. What exactly is 'dating down'? Because when it comes to character I would never settle, but the rest are just details.

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  • If truly liked/loved her, then you would never considered her as lower class/status to you.
    If you honestly want to date her then give her the respect she deserves. You are not dating down but otherwise dating up to a beautiful woman.

    though if I were her and read this then I would definitely be mad and re-consider dating you

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  • As long as you like her, who cares?

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    • 18d

      Mostly she does.. I can get over it however it appears that its having a heavy emotional effect on her.. She has gone as far as to sit inside and not want to be seen in public with me because the looks she gets.

    • 18d

      Make her feel beautiful then

    • 18d

      I'm sorry. Not everyone has the ability to mentally and emotionally ignore... snubbing.
      In others areas of like does she have a "fuck whatever they think" attitude. Some people don't care. Others, well, the social anxiety and compensation could make both of you unhappy.

  • Why are they saying such things? In love money, looks and status doesn't matter in love, what does is your heart and hers. If you are secure in this, their opinions matter less and you can even tell them why. :)

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  • What is your culture? And no I wouldn't

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    • 18d

      lol is it possible for you to date down?

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    • 18d

      huh no but i will say anyone who would date your troll looking ass must be diggin at the bottom of the barrel.. and you say you date up.. shiiitt im shocked you date at all haha

    • 18d

      And that was supposed to be funny? Nice try

  • I tell them to fuck off. If I love someone no one is going to affect that except for that person and myself.

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  • How far below you? Generally speaking a man uplifts the social status of his significant other. How ever if she is far below, to such a degree that her manners would never "pass" in his social circle, he should give her up if he loves her. Either that or just accept that she will always be a discreet nonpublic lover.

    I don't think race or ethnicity or income differences matter much. However, significant differences in class expectations are very very difficult to overcome.

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  • You date who you want to date. Don't care what other people say tbvh.

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  • Someone dumber? No.
    Someone poorer? Yes.
    Someone less attractive? Yes.

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  • Fuck that. I'm from a similar country, and 6 years down the line people still talk behind our backs saying my partner isn't good enough for me. Fuck them. They're disgusting judgmental people. For such stupid reasons too! Like they just try so hard to find reasons.
    Everybody knows not to ever say that shit in my face anymore, but my brother tells me what people say when I'm not there.

    Now we've had a kid, it has died down quite a bit, and people talk less. I think now they just know it's happening and that's it.

    My parents were the same. Very very similar situation. Fuck what anybody thinks. If they're a good person, they're a good person, and good people aren't below anybody... those judgmental people who like to gossip are below people. Those people who are saying this shit to you, these gossips, please just ignore them. It's none of their business. And if you make them accept it, eventually they will.
    Defend your woman. Make sure they know they should never say these things to you.

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  • What are the reasons that supposedly make her SEEM below you?

    I believe that when people judge others by appearance, race or type of work to determine someone else to be below you, then those people are really the ones below me and I look down on them like the pebble under my shoe. If they have other reasons for example a violent person who beats you up and seems to want to have all authority over you, or someone who doesn't want to work but wants to be all day shopping for themselves etc etc. similar things to that I can agree that that person is not good for you and can be considered below you for obvious reasons, but when two people like each other and others say one is too good for the other based on critical motives such as visually unacceptable to THEM! Then they should just shut the fuck up, and mind their own lives. And if you care and allowe their criticism over someone that YOU are with, then maybe you should consider finding someone else because at that point the one below her is you for not having your own opinion and making others make your mind up for you.

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  • If you put your foot down people will start excepting your relationship more. Don't let people look down on her and your relationship and eventually they won't. Do you think she is below you? If so then dump her... she deserves someone who sees her as a prize just as you do.

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What Guys Said 7

  • if i like them i don´t really care if it´s "down" or whatever xD

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  • Yeah, i'd date someone below me but I don't think anyone can get lower than me.

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  • I don't down and I don't date up because I'm asexual/aromantic.

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  • But everybody is equal and the same anon.

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  • Their opinions only retain value if you allow them to

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  • I would because I'm not hypergamous like women are.

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  • About all you can do is ignore it

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    • 18d

      I usually won't date down anyway so that's a big no for me

    • 18d

      Oh and you just made me laugh my ass off on what you just said to Ivoriangirl 😊

    • 18d

      You're lucky she can't block this question since she's a chronic blocker to most people that don't agree with what she says

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