Guys, is it possible to be in love with a girl but not be ready for a relationship for whatever reasons?

Is it possible to be seeing a girl and you fall in love with her but despite that you're still not ready for a relationship with her? Might depend on what's going on in his life or his past but is that possible?

  • Yes, might depend on his past or what's going on in his life
    85% (73)
  • No
    15% (13)
And you are? I'm a GuyGirls can not vote on this poll

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27

What Guys Said 27

  • Yes. And this sort of emotional perception happens all the time, and it can happen to anyone; guys and or girls. And I would have to agree with you Asker that it could be depended upon what's going on with his life or past (Which you will need to consider). Here are three other reasons why I would think the individual would love a girl but would avoid a relationship based on my observations.

    1) He's not ready for the commitment, the time to put forth, and the energy to keep a relationship going. (If he sees it this way) : There is a lot of energy, time, and commitment you would put forth when in a relationship and some people cannot take that kind of pressure sometimes. Especially when our lives are busy and cannot juggle through relationship vs. Work (School) balance.
    2) He's not looking to settle down: During our younger years, we would like to spend our time by searching for someone and try different people. People know that there are more fish in the sea and want to take an opportunity to look around. They're also probably just wanted to experience as much of the freedom and independence as possible without getting bogged down in a relationship that could contain restrictions.
    3) Doubt: There's guys who probably consider doubting themselves of being with that person just because they're out of their league (Beauty, Intelligence, Personality, etc) So they usually will give up, making signs to try to get the girl's attention, or won't have the confidence to approach that person. [We can probably deduce the "fear of rejection" in this category here as well]

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    • 19d

      Great suggestions but remember this is about being in love with that person and reasons why they won't get into a relationship right now.

  • Yes it's completely possible for a variety of reasons:

    1. He's decided to focus on other priorities (i. e. school, work, volunteering, etc.) and doesn't think that he'll be able to devote the time/energy towards a relationship

    2. He might have trust issues or commitment issues due to previous experiences with women. He might want the relationship but he's afraid of getting hurt. I have this problem myself.

    3. He might just need more time to decide if he wants to make the commitment before going through with it.

    Not an exhaustive list, but these are the three reasons why I might feel as you described.

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  • I don't believe in the "I'll love you later" bullshit excuse. If you're truly in love you'll do whatever it takes to be with them

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  • Don't think its true love then for the most part. Life isn't generally as complicated as some people want to pretend it is. It's possible, but unlikely.

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  • Absolutely. Very common is a fear of intimacy. You crave to be in intimate relationship, but at the last moment you back out. At the same time it's the thing you want the most, but also fear the most.

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  • No. People who are in love do not let other things get in the way. They push forward for that level of infatuation.

    But while we are on that top it's rare to zero chance that someone is in love with another who they are not even in a relationship with. the right word would in infatuated, obsessed, or/and fixated.

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  • Ben there - done that.

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  • Yes, when I was in college I just made a concious decision not to focus on girls or dating because I knew I just didn't have the time to be in a relationship. And I know my brother who is in graduate school is doing the same as he has turned down 2 girls cause he has to focus on school. He might be intrested but have other priorities in his life he needs to focus on before he is ready to be in a relationship. You should just ask him, he will probably tell you if this is the case. When this was the case for me a girl who I hung out with wanted to go out with me and I just straight up told her that I was too busy with school and had too many things on my plate to date her

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  • I could love you but know that we are no good for each other. Sometimes we're just not at a good point in our lives to be in a romantic relationship. Better to let go of love than to experience the soul-crushing, gut-wrenching heartache that ensues after a failed relationship.

    If you truly love someone, you set them free...

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    • 19d

      Do you think those two people could find each other again in life when they are in a healthier spot?

    • 16d

      I'm sure it's possible but it depends on them. You can keep tabs on one another, remain friends and if things change for the better...

  • Yes, it's possible he isn't ready for a commitment and still fall in love
    but i can guarantee his love won't be genuine and for real.

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  • Yes, I wish I was done with graduate school, owning a house and a good career. That would make it easier.

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  • Yes, it's possible.

    For example I have had a bad time with studies, and I'm using all my energy on stabilising that. Only then I will have that extra time for expending in someone.

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  • No! Infatuation is not love.

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  • Maybe he loves multiple girls? That's sometimes the case as well and being in an open relationship with a dozen is sometimes exhausting.

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  • Yes. it is possible , maybe because you want to be alone, because you can't be ready to date yet , etc...

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  • Yeah its possible.

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  • Yeah some people just might have fear of commitment or just test it out to see how it goes.

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  • Yeah, anything is possible.

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  • That or he's not in in love with you

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  • it's possible, but in my opinion, i prefer serious relation that makes each-others feell safe ! because serious realtionships don't break people's heart !

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  • yes of course

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  • Yes, but to be honest that's stupid.

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  • He's a chicken shit and is afraid of what might happen or what people might think or both.

    Or It's just lust pretending to be love.

    Either way, he is not a person to lead a healthy relationship.

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  • Yes?

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  • You can love anyone or anything and not have a relationship.

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  • why would i ever get in a relationship?

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  • been there done that have the t-shirt memories and some regrets

    Not done with college, no career started & she wanted to omit BC pills from our lovemaking + lied about it = voluptuous Italian goodbye (sigh)

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