Men, why would he act so keen and then ignore me?

So I'll try to keep this short. I was seeing someone over the summer, it was intense at first and he was always mushy with me, telling me I was beautiful and he missed me, introducing me to his friends, making plans for future dates etc. He stood me up by mistake, I was angry, he promised to make it up to me... and he didn't. So that was it.

But I bumped into him recently on a night out. He started being all mushy again and apologised for us stopping talking, he said he thought he'd messed up bad and that I hated him. We started kissing and being all couply, he bought all my drinks and was being soppy all night, saying he couldn't believe he almost lost the most amazing girl he's ever met, etc. I stayed over (we just cuddled), and in the morning he was mushy again, and he said he wanted something special, and he'd take me out at the end of the week.

So I messaged him a couple of days later to give him my number. He accepted my friend request on fb, but didn't get in touch at all. He liked my status the other day too, but that's it.

Why would he act like we were getting back together, and then ignore me? Also I know I sound naive saying this, but he sounded so genuine, it really felt like he meant the things he said, and it also matched up to things that happened (as if he was telling the truth).

It can't be for sex for a few reasons:
1. I told him straight away no sex. And again when we went back to his.
2. He didn't try anything in bed, we just talked, kissed and cuddled.
3. He pulls girls all the time (I know he has been while we were apart). He could easily have left me alone and pulled someone else.

But surely he's not still nervous because:
1. I told him I don't hate him.
2. I was happy to see him, and said yes when he asked if I'd like to go out.
3. I messaged him with my number.

I mean maybe he just changed his mind. I know he has lots of fun being single.

14d I just don't understand why he would be so mushy (he'd already pulled me, and I wasn't being mushy with him, so he didn't need to, if he didn't mean it. Are men really that good at lying? Or did he just change his mind?

And if he was going to ignore me, why not ignore me completely? Why add me as a friend and like my status?

I realise it's definitely over now and he's not interested, but any insight would be really appreciated.

I'm quite confused.

Thanks :)
13d Thanks guys.

Anyone else got an opinion too please? Ta


What Guys Said 1

  • Sounds like he can't make up His mind.

    • 13d

      Thanks, never really thought of that. I always know what I want so I'd never think of it.

    • 13d

      He may also be stringing you along and messing with you. Just don't let him torment you, give up on any chances of getting back with him, he's obviously immature and can't just make a clean break. Some guys can be like that, just don't let get to you. Do u show any signs that you might want to get back with him?

    • 12d

      Well I didn't until we bumped into each other. And then he was being the mushy one, I was happy to be with him but I mostly just responded to what he said. Thanks.

What Girls Said 1

  • He changed his mind and he's not sure what he wants. Lots of people are exactly like that. He values his own freedom, but he also enjoys the emotional connection you share.

    • 13d

      Thanks, that does make sense in a way.