Please be honest with me. Am I pathetic?

I've never been in a relationship and I really want to experience all the nice things. Therefore I would basically date everybody who is alright and halfway my type. I really am desperate for somebody to hug me tight when it's cold outside and have cute play fights with. Please be honest with me, am I pathetic for wanting a relationship that badly?

  • Yes.
    25% (8)9% (6)14% (14)Vote
  • No.
    69% (22)69% (45)69% (67)Vote
  • Other.
    6% (2)15% (10)12% (12)Vote
  • Results.
    0% (0)7% (4)5% (4)Vote
And you are? I'm a GirlI'm a Guy

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Most Helpful Guy

  • "smh it's hard to find guys." This makes no sense. There are ~3,500,000,000 guys in the world. Pick one.

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    • 15d

      You do realize not every guy would want to date me?

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    • 15d

      You can do it! Good luck.

    • 15d

      Thanks :)

Most Helpful Girl

  • No, you're not. But wait for the right person. No relationship is better than bad relationship. You are beautiful and I am sure that you are going to find a great man who will fall in love with your wonderful smile and personality :)

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    • 15d

      Awwwe thanks, that's so cute of you to say. I hope the best.

What Guys Said 36

  • I'd say that this is a silly question because you're clearly not as desperate as you describe. It's not particularly hard to get in a relationship, especially at your age as there are countless boys who are ready and willing to take you out. In that regard, you're actually in a unique time of your life as you will never again have as many dating options as you do now.

    So yeah, if you really wanted a relationship you could be in one tomorrow, guaranteed but the fact that you aren't means that you aren't as unhappy about being single as you're trying to lead on. ;-)

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    • 15d

      Don't get me wrong. I do want somebody to be there for me, I still don't want it to be just anybody. I still want to have the opportunity of it being a healthy relationship and not everybody can provide that.

  • No you want what many openly and some secretly try and hide that they want... companionship.

    What's wrong with wanting someone to share experiences with. Rather romantic &a simple like tight hugs & embracing during horror movies or just from the simple fact of being away from each other to long.

    Or comical and simple, like play fights, pillow fights, poking, random kisses or kicks to the butt.

    It's fun having someone to share those experiences with. Good times or bad. Sad or happy. A little adventurous or dangerous, we all want it in some form or another eh.

    You're not pathetic mate. I had it once and lost it, and desperately want it again meself haha. Good luck really, on finding it mate, it's out there for you somewhere 😌🙂.

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    • 15d

      This actually made me smile :). Thank you. I wish you the very best as well and hope you find somebody worthy of sharing your life with.

    • 15d

      Haha glad it did :). And thank you, thank you, I hope I do to.

  • Don't put pressure on yourself. No relationship is far better than a bad one or worse, an unhappy one! It's not easy these days in the USA,, for sure... most of the old rules no longer apply.

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    • 15d

      I'm not pressuring myself really, I'm just really desperate 😩.

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    • 15d

      Thanks, I'll do my best.

    • 15d

      Break a leg!

  • Im in the same boat as you I'm 20 years old and never had a girlfriend when people ask me i always lie i feel like they would be all judgmental and look at me funny asking me a whole bunch of questions. I usually avoid these thoughts of utterly loneliness and tell my self to suck it up but some times I just can't help it and it hurts. I have friends and family but I never had some one who truly gets me and for the past couple years I have had this deep empty feeling inside like somethings missing. I have money a nice car and a good job but with out that significant other I don't think I can be truly happy. It seems like the only place I can realy vent is online because no one else will understand. I kind of regret answering this question cus now I fell sad again but o well I'm in to deep now lol. Anyways your defiantly not alone if I ever travel to Germany I'll take you out and we'll go on a date.. deal?

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    • 15d

      I am sorry to hear that but I agree totally with you. I don't lie about relationships but I do really want one. That's a great idea, we'll keep each other company when you come over :).

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    • 15d

      I feel it i wouldn't say 90% though there's actually people on there that are looking to date there's other sites like okc and pof that are free I tried them no luck so far but I'm sure it's a lot easier for girls.

    • 15d

      I don't know about other platforms but tinder at least in my area is a hookup app.

  • Your not pathetic. Your just waiting for the right guy (not wasting feelings on others) and when he comes it will be more than awesome.

    I never had a relationship or anything like that or my first kiss. That depresses me at times, but its nothing to be ashamed of. I think its actually something to be proud of. It means that your saving all the emotions for someone really special.

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    • 15d

      I'm not ashamed of being single, sometimes I just really wish I could share my life with somebody else.

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    • 14d

      Ok :-) but good luck anyway :D oh and if i wrote a word the wrong way xD Sorry im still getting use to my laptop. Usually i use a desktop PC... LOL

    • 14d

      You're alright :) we al misspell things sometimes.

  • Pathetic? No. Desperate? Yes. Understandable but your still young you still have time. I would say just let it happen you don't want to date some one your not interested in because that's not really fair to them but you don't want to have too high expectations either because quite frankly nobody knows what they want in a partner no matter how much they say otherwise. It will happen give it time.

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  • No, you aren't. You just haven't found the right person yet. Don't give up - took me 44 years to find the right girl. And many, many mistakes along the way. You'll get there. Trust me. :)

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  • No, it's not pathetic to want someone like that. If you don't find your "one" while doing that, I hope you at least make some new friends during it.

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  • No you are not pathetic what so ever.. you know that saying.. there is someone out there for everyone.. we all at times all go through those feelings.. to be honest and this is a bit of the track I know.. but after I had my bad fall.. all broken bones were fixed and also some internal injuries.. but one that could not be repaired was some nerve damage I had done in that fall.. and because of that I from that day forward I have worn adult diapers and rubber pants.. and even tho that was the only scar that was left from that fall.. but got so lucky that I could still do most all of what I had done before that bad day showed up in my life.. well I was one that before that happened to me.. loved to date the ladies.. and figured that my dating life was now over because of now wearing diapers and rubber pants daily and thought no women will date me because of that.

    Then one day I decided to plunge back into the dating scene just because I still could.. and when I found a women I wanted to date.. I sat her down and explained everything to her and was very honest about everything to do with it.. and that it was just a bad hand I was dealt.. she fully excepted me and we dated for nearly a year.. and found that my dating life was back on and I worried to much before I took the plunge.. I have had many more dates since that one.. and all went as well as the one I just explained.. anyways.. I do understand where you are coming from.. but do not fall into a trap and rush into things lots of uncaring guys out there that only want sex.. feelings for you may never be on their mind.. and just know a very nice relationship is out there for you.. just be yourself and the guys will come to you.. I do hope you do not view this as a smart ass post just for me to be heard.. I just wanted to say my view point as fully as I could.. take care and best of luck to you.

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  • No, that's normal. You just have to be careful that you don't just pick some random guy (that might be really bad for you) because of those feelings. Use your head and keep your senses that's all. Those feelings are totally normal though. You're not pathetic at all.

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    • 14d

      I'll try not to get with the wrong guy but sometimes it's just hard to see who the wrong guy is.

    • 14d

      Yes true. The main thing is to see things the way they are. Meaning if there's something about him you don't like, he's not likely going to change so instead of thinking "he'll change" or you can change him, think "is that something I can accept about him?"

    • 14d

      I'd say, there's quite a lot I could live with if everything else would fit.

  • There so many girls your age that have never even had a boyfriend or gone out on a date. Of course you're not pathetic

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    • 15d

      Thank you :). To me it seems they have though, all my girl friends have been in at least one relationship. Apart from one but she has no interest in dating whatsoever.

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    • 15d

      You're very welcome. Don't worry your time will come no rush

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      I hope rather sooner than later though.

  • What's pathetic is that you'll take anything... that's sad... and can be harmful.

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  • Of course not... I'm 41 and I have the same feeling! Not that I want a girl to play with like when I was 20 but one to hug and give love to, absolutely :D

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  • I would not consider that pathetic maybe you have lowered your standards slightly which is fine. I think you will find someone soon.

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    • 15d

      Thanks, I do hope so too :).

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    • 15d

      That might be a good place to get to know people. Study groups help.

    • 15d

      There aren't any real study groups atm. They're usually not until shortly before exams.

  • It isn't pathetic to crave it... but pretty lame you would involve with someone who isn't really what you want/like. That sounds like future problems, for many reasons I can think of. Just know being in a relationship doesn't equal happiness and pretty things, it just mean having the good stuff with a lot of issues/responsabilities, and shitty stuff here and there.

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    • 15d

      See, that's the thing. I idealize relationships because I don't know what they're like and I really want to experience it. With all the downsides it might bring. That's why I seem pathetic in my own opinion.

    • 15d

      Yeah it is can't lie.. but I know dudes who have done it so they get their experience with a girl and such. I'd probably be in the same lame position if I wasn't lucky to date girls I was genuinely interested in. Still, some of my relationships were absolute shit, even though some of them were nice while they lasted.

    • 15d

      Well thank you for your honest opinion. I still hope for the right guy to come along before I make a mistake though :).

  • That's pretty much what most people are looking for...

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  • Try and create a point of interaction, construct a relationship through positively expressing yourself and also taking in what he gives you...

    Sooner than you know it you'll be dancing all night

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  • you are not pathetic. i never experienced those things before. and i do really want all those things badly with my future wife, or a girlfriend that im gonna marry with in the future.

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  • To answer your question... yes and no. No because we are all human and as humans we all crave companionship. Yes because you're willing to settle and get it from anyone. Never settle. If there's one thing I've learned in life it's that.

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  • No, you are not pathetic it is human need to have someone by their side.

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  • You're not patetic. It even made me go "awwww".
    You also got the most efficient mindset. I like that. Now tell me you don't manipulate and i will tell you you're a catch.

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    • 14d

      Wouldn't everybody say they don't manipulate others? I sincerely hope I don't, I haven't so far and don't plan on doing so.

  • Most of it isn't pathetic except for the part of you would basically date everyone who is alright.

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  • You are a girl, When did getting boys became hard for you guys? like seriously. girls can have any guy they like in seconds

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    • 15d

      Not true, the guy I really want said he is the relationship type of guy so he takes things slow. However as slow as we are moving I don't think he has any interest in me.

    • 15d

      at least moving anywhere, right?

    • 15d

      Yeah but he treats me like he treats his mates and I'm not sure that's what I want. He'll make stupid faces and such and tell me jokingly to 'shut up' when I make fun of him. He really treats me like one of his guy friends.

  • Other------You are not pathetic.

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  • You are not pathetic

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  • I've also never been in a relationship. I don't think you are pathetic 😊

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    • 15d

      Thank you :).

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    • 15d

      It doesn't really because it makes me feel sorry for you. I hope you fjnd the right girl soon.

    • 15d

      I hope so too

  • Course not gil. : D
    Go learn about it , grab the guy ! : D

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  • The pathetic thing is that you'd date everybody.

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    • 15d

      I know, that's what I also thought.

    • 15d

      Wenn du mehr darüber reden möchtest, schreib mir einfach eine Nachricht.

  • i'm in the same boat I've never had a relationship we all want a companion a partner you still lots to look for in life you are not pathetic don't be so hard on yourself

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    • 15d

      But it's pathetic to whine over it.. However I can't help it, sometimes I just feel so down.

    • 15d

      I feel the same way

    • 15d

      If you'd live near me we could change that... but smh it's hard to find guys.

  • we all have needs 😁

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    • 15d

      the important thing is not to feel bad about your needs. its why they are there. also, seeing a therpist could help

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    • 15d

      where would you meet ppl?

    • 14d

      The gym. That's about it.

  • More from Guys
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What Girls Said 10

  • No you are not pathetic, I had my 1st relationship just recently and I am in my mid 20s. Lets just say its not enjoyable to settle, better to be single then w/someone who isn't your match. I just recently entered a new relationship after breaking up w/my 1st love. He wasn't compatible w/me, but I decided to try it out and I walked away w/heartbreak.

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    • 15d

      I am so sorry to hear that :(. Nobody should have to make bad wxperiences in relationships.

  • No, your not pathetic to be feeling this way. But do not be like so many females and just rush to just get with anyone. I have seen so many women get hurt by doing this. Dont just rush into something with a guy without getting to know him. You want to know if he isn't just using you for sex, or already have someone but just using you for casual sex.

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  • I'm the same way. It's just human nature and feelings.

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  • I don't think you're pathetic. Your just being very human; everybody wants to feel loved/desired/wanted.
    It's alright to want a relationship but please don't settle just because you want to be in one.

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  • Yea...
    Cd you re setting yourself up for a failure

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  • Everybody needs love!

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  • no u r not

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  • You're definitely not pathetic. Who wouldn't want someone who loves and cares about them, someone to share good times with and cuddle with.

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    • 15d

      Thank you :). Of course t's not pathetic to have somebody but I am at a point where I would take nearly everybody and that's what seems pathetic to me.

  • I feel the same way!! But, i don't think you're pathetic.. At all.

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    • 15d

      Thank you :). I am sorry to hear that you feel the same, it's certainly not a great feeling.

  • Keep it together woman

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