How do you feel about dating a single parent?

I've known this guy for about a few years and we recently have been out on a few dates. I really like him and he is an amazing person. He also has a child. How do you feel about single parents and dating them? Any tips or advice?


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What Guys Said 57

  • Single parents tend to be more serious about relationships. If you are both careful, you will avoid meeting his child too quickly. If he or she falls for you and then you break up the relationship, you have hurt the child needlessly. . . or maybe, when you are thinking about whether to break up, you allow the relationship with the child to influence your decision.

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  • I would not date a single mother. Most (not all) single mothers at my age are not single mothers because of divorce - they are single mothers because they made bad decisions with irresponsible men. On top of that, most of them are miserable. I'm not ready to be a father, and I'm sure as hell not cleaning up the mess that made them miserable. Yes, I've been told to "man up" and just do the job. No, I have not changed my position on this issue and likely never will.

    Unfortunately, because I don't date guys, I don't know what dating a single dad would be like. I'm not sure if it has the same social stigma attached to it as does the title of "single mom". But I could ask you this - if you date this guy, are you ready to potentially take on the role of "mom" to this kid?

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  • I wouldn't date a single parent. Not now. Maybe in the future if the kid was born during marriage and something bad happened that she became single. But a woman who got pregnant from a boyfriend of one year, or from a one night stand? No fucking way.

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  • Single moms are pretty much desperate to find security, and long term commitment from their SO's, putting aside baggage most of these women have, in my experience. I dated briefly a single mom at some point but I'll never do it again, at least not in the near future.

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  • Advice in what way? His kid (s) are going to see you as a threat likely, especially if the mother is still in their lives so don't pretend or act like you're trying to take her place. Act like more of a "buddy" to them as opposed to a mother figure. And vise versa, make sure your child knows this new guys is not his/her daddy. Other than that, everything else seems to be ok. You both have a child and know that and accept it about each other so that's the main thing.

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  • Well if the women I wanted to date was a single parent, it would not be a problem long as we both want to spend time with one another.. and if her child was say a baby or toddler.. heck I would even change diapers to help out.. I am good I think at doing that job.. I have had lots of practice

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  • I am fine as long as the child isn't too young. But I have already "been there, done that" and don't want to "do that" again. If I was younger, it would not be an issue.
    I won't date anyone with kids more then 1 yr younger then my youngest who is 17.

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  • its fine, its pretty normal now. how sad, but true. but I'd want to know why, that might change my mind. in the end, it is a question of whether you can handle each other and the responsibilities that go with it and make it fun.

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  • If I was established and could afford it, I wouldn't eliminate the possibility. I would have to want to raise kids, though, and I don't see that happening. I'd much prefer my own freedom.

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  • I will never do that unless I'm a single parent myself. I'm not taking care of some other male's offspring. That goes against my evolutionary imperative.

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  • Nope can't do it. Bad experience with girls like that.

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    • 12d

      what is the worst experience you have had with girls like that?

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    • 12d

      damn. that's tough. thank you for sharing.

    • 12d

      True but each experience is there own. Nothing wrong turning on mommy mode. Lol but you do have a man who is there as well.

  • I can do that but I'm not going to be the new father to her kids they already have one

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  • The kid will ALWAYS be a factor, so you will have to be on good terms and be attentive to his child. Otherwise the relationship will inevitably fail.

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  • Are you prepared to plan your life around someone else's kid? Do you accept that things might work out and leaving said kid will break your heart?

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  • Communication is key. Ask him about his parental relationship and how to integrate into this family of his.

    As for any social stigma, let's get real. Most parents nowadays are single parents. Most people are children of single parents. Most people come from broken families. Most people are children of divorce.

    We're liberal and progressive and trendy and hip.

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  • I would date a single parent, the only issue is I have not really been around children since I was one. I don't know how a child would act or what my role would be as far as long term dating is concerned.

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  • The girl has to be really special for me to fully commit to her if she is a single mom. It's a big commitment not only to her but to her child.

    Since this dude has a kid himself, I assume he is a single parent also, so he understands the sort of things you go through with your child. I don't see anything wrong with both of you pursuing a romantic relationship as long as it doesn't effect your children negatively.

    Good luck! I hope
    It works out for you ❤️

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  • never tried it

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  • Have done that before, i personally date single parents only to have fun for a while, let's say a year, if i feel she is preasuring me to do things i don't want to, or if she wants me to involve with her child then i bounce.

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    • 12d

      I hope you upfront and honest about your intentions. Being a single parent is very hard and moms don't need the added stress of a man who "just wants to have fun" or just have sex, especially when it takes time and energy away from their child/children.

    • 12d

      @LoveHolyGod
      Oh yes, i forgot to add that i am upfront with them, i usually at the third date, and before we have sex, i tell her that i wish to have a short relationship with her, because in the long term will not work due to the age gap usually 15+ years, and ideally i want to marry someone who is around my age,
      THAT being said, i give everything during that short relationship, i give all my efforts to feel and make her feel special, i give my time unconditionally, i will date her throughout the whole year or more, i will celebrate her achievements and be with her when she isn't doing so well, i will not save anything for myself, for me being in this short relationships is refreshing and sweet, because the whole relationship is the honeymoon phase, so we really have a great time together. So it's a good memorie for both of us.

      Those women who got offended, get over it, i force no one to do anything.

    • 11d

      Just so you know, sex outside of marriage even with protection can lead to getting someone pregnant sometimes, so then you would be the single parent. Abstinence before marriage is the only way to avoid this fully. I would never be with someone who said they just want to have fun, life is more serious than this. I am not judging you just telling you what I have learned and my life lessons have been through. I hope it all works out the best for you, God bless.

  • Been there, done that. No thanks

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  • if i truly liked her

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    • 11d

      But then, I wouldn't bother with a girl if I didn't like her... I have no time for flings!

  • How do you feel about it? It doesn't matter what we think. If people disagree remember the saying "hater's gonna hate".

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  • I don't even get why that would be an issue. You'd be dating the guy, not his child. Everyone has some baggage, it's what happens when we, you know, live.

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  • not what I wanna do at my current phase of my life

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  • I'm not into women with kids.

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  • To me single mothers are forbidden. I don't and won't date them.

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    • 12d

      How come? I don't have a kid or anything, I'm just curious haha

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    • 11d

      @lawstudent931 It just never happened because I married late in life. Although, that's
      about to change. PM me and I'll tell you more.

    • 11d

      @lawstudent931 Trust me most men do view them as used and damaged. We disagree. To me that's settling for less than a single man, w/o kids should. I know this is harsh, but
      they are my views. So be it.

  • I personally wouldn't.

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  • The presence of a child changes the whole dating deal. If you're not ready for attachment (especially with the child) then this isn't the road to take.

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  • If I like them and we have great chemistry , if the kid (s) like me then that's an added bonus.

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What Girls Said 39

  • I'd certainly consider dating a single father. Having kids may make it difficult for him to have a lot of free time, but I'd appreciate and respect that. It doesn't make a guy undateable cos he has kids

    I'd enter into a relationship with him if I fell in love with him. I'd grow to love his kids too cos they are part of him, his life, his world and everything.

    If you like this guy then just take things slowly. Get to know him more and see where it leads you both. He may have kids , but a great relationship could develop between you both.

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  • When someone types I wouldn't date a single parent... everyone is one snot away from being a single parent.. death or a parent leaving kid, pray it never happens to those people!
    Me I date men who either have kids or don't.. if I like the guy I will get along with the child for the dads sake. Simple.
    I have a stepdad who brought us up and better dad than my own sorry excuse.
    If you like this guy you get the perks or playing mum but with none of the aggro attached to it.. you're the fun girlfriend that buys the kid sweets and plays games with kid.. but not fully being mother to kid..
    It's hard work raising kids, he will be there for his kid always who will be there for him? It's something you need to think about before you attach yourself to the man.. deep down do you see a future with him? If not walk away now.

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  • I think if you really like the guy, then why not give it a shot?

    Talk to him, learn about his situation and find out where he stands. YOu might find that you have a lot in common.

    I'm talking to a single parent right now. He's doesn't have custody of his child, but he sees her every other weekend. I'm usually hesitant, but he's close by and pretty much all the guys in my age range have at least one kid by now. I'm 27. and while that seems crazy, it's just how it is in my area.

    So I've decided to be a bit more open with my options. I don't have any kids myself but I would love at least once some day.

    I'm a very loving person, and I'm sure I have enough love in my heart to welcome a child that isn't mine into it. Sure it won't be easy but we'll see.

    Plus you don't have to have it all figured out right away. You can date him and if things aren't working out just move on. It's not like you have to marry him right away. Just keep it light and fun. If things get more serious, than so be it. If not, well there are other guys out there right?

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  • in my case, where i don't want children (my own or otherwise), i would really have to think about it my feelings for the guy before agreeing to date him.

    if i was in love with the guy, sure;
    if i only kinda sorta liked him, then probably not.

    /my 2 cents.

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  • I feel like him being a single parent shouldn't be the problem. If you like this guy and you guys seem to have a connection and him having a child wouldn't bother you, why not? His child is obviously a big important part of his life but if you guys would try to further your relationship in the future (if it happens) would you also make that child an important part too? It's a lot to handle, I'm sure but if you think that you can also be apart of his child's life, why not?

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  • Id be cool with it, just not yet. Right now, I'm still in education and I don't have a job and I'm not prepared for my own children, so I don't want to be an influence on someone else's... In a few years when I'm more stable, it'd be fine!

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  • That's up to you. I personally would not date a single parent because children are not something I want and our lifestyles would clash. But just because it isn't right for me doesn't mean it's not for you. Just consider what it is you want out of life and if a child will fit in with that.

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    • 12d

      If you do choose to form a relationship with him, you need to accept that you are not going to be his top priority.

  • No idea what to recommend. Just figure out if you want to take care of that kid. I don't know where the mum is, but you owe the kid motherly love, kindness and understanding if you plan on being a part of the family.

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  • I would. However I would have to really like the guy and see a future with him. Children are hard work, and they will always come first to their parent, so you have to accept that you will come second to their child, so that may mean cancellation of a date, a trip, it may mean plans get rearranged and that you can't just go off and do what ever you want to do like you could if both of you have no kids. You can't be jealous of exs because they will be in your life for as long as you're in that persons life. Kids are hard work, and it will put a strain on your relationship like any relationship with kids. But it's all worth it with the right person.

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    • 12d

      Thank you! So they exist... that's good to know 😊

  • If I would like him, it wouldn't bother me at all. My only fear would be that the child would hate me 😯 But I would still try to show love and to be kind with the chill and show him that I am not trying to replace his mother.
    You have to accept him if you say that he is an amazing man. 😊

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  • Hopefully single moms know if they had a child/children out of marriage they can still turn around and wait until marriage and a guy with good intentions and a good loving heart who wants to fully commit comes around. To the men who are trying to put down a single mom, if you have sex outside of marriage I hope you aren't a pot calling the kettle black because it can happen to anyone who engages in sex outside or marriage because protection doesn't always work, only abstinence does. This is why we should all wait until our truelove/marriage comes along.

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  • If you like kids and get along well with them, then dating a single parent won't be an issue.
    But, if you don't, maybe the relationship won't work out.
    I personally wouldn't date a single dad. Even though I respect people who raise their children by themselves.

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  • I'm 26 so if they were the right person for me yeah I'd make it work, if I'd known them a while. I'd be open to dating and seeing how things go.

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  • I've been dating a single mom for a while now. It can be complicated but she's a great mom and the kids are awesome.

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  • I actually wouldn't mind dating a guy that has a child, but I would be cautious because I had to many bad experiences where some of them really wanted to get bck with their childs mother and I as just a temporary fixed.

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  • tbh i've never asked myself the question

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  • I don't think I could just yet. I'm quite young, and not ready to deal with the issues children bring along. But I don't think it would be a big deal for me in the future

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  • ı didn't do that

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  • Not interested in someone else's baggage no offence. Also, I don't really like kids. If you don't mind those things though and really care about the person then go for it :)

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  • It's a turn off for me and I'd never do this at my age.

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  • I won't be able to because I am not responsible enough to raise a child, let alone someone else's.

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  • Honestly if you love the person enough. I dated a single dad but he is a dead beat loser. (Not all single dads are like that so don't get offended. Just that's the only person I did date. But I love his daughter she was a sweet heart. Just respect the mother and her choices, I know me and my exs child's mother got a long really well and we are friends now as weird as that is. Honestly just enjoy him and be honest. 😊

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  • I wouldn't be able to do it just because I feel like we would be on different wavelengths.

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    • 12d

      Question: What does a single dad raising a kid and a guy that was just fired have in common?
      Answer: Their budget for the next 3 months.

  • When I'm older, I would date a single parent, if I liked the man enough.

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  • I dated a guy with a 3 y at old girl, it was nice

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  • Don't get enough credit, my friend has a kid they never want to meet her

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  • No I wouldn't.

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  • I wouldn't do it.

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  • There's no negative point I find in dating a single parent. he/she will rather be matured and responsible for life situations

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  • ı wouldn't do that

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