Are Plenty of Fish and Tinder just hook-up sites now, or do guys actually use them for dating?

I'm using both Tinder and Plenty of Fish to try and rectify my current (and extremely long term) single status... but I'm starting to think I've got the wrong end of the stick with them... are they just for hook ups now, or do guys still use them for actual genuine dating?





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What Guys Said 46

  • Pof and tinder are the like bars of the online dating scene, yes you may find a guy that actually is looking for a date, but more often than not, you meet someone who just wants to hookup.

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  • I don't really think either of them were ever for genuine dating.

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  • I sure hope not. My wife and I met on plentyoffish and it worked as a connecting point for us!

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  • Why would anyone call either a "hook up site"? I think that is hillarious. You never hear bars being called that. Even though that is all they are. No guy I have ever known would think about getting seriuous with any woman he met in a bar. I use POF and Tinder. I have never had a "hookup" once. The only way I can date is online so I am glad it is there. The people that don't understand online dating are typically, people who don't understand computers. It is hard to believe that anyone under 35 would even have that issue.

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    • 15d

      I get sick of hearing people talk about them being only for hookups. They simple allow you to meet people you're attracted to, that is all they do.. What people choose to do with that is up to them.

  • Probably. I don't have any experience with Tinder or POF, but it seems everyone always says Tinder is a hookup app and nothing more. If you're looking for a serious relationship, then use a paid service like e-harmony or something. Only serious people would pay. And they have requirements.

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  • Sadly from what I can ascertain, I believe both are used for casual hookups. It works both ways though, because when I was on tinder I would come across absolute skanks or some girls who were single parents, unstable or men haters.

    I know men give those sites a bad name, because I was on them because I wanted a genuine relationship and had little luck.

    I've broken away from dating websites now, and i'm taking a breather just to be me and enjoy my own life.

    Good luck in your search Lioness :-)

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  • I don't know about PoF (other than that it has a shitty reputation as the place where all the freaks go). Relationships do start on tinder sometimes but it's a bad place to look for love for a lot of reasons.

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  • I have used pof and okcupid and I have had conversations. Met a few women who lied about who they were and their appearance. The free sites I also found are full of liars and narcissist. Or women with fake profiles catfishing men and trying to get free dinner and money out of them. I have met some women that would never be satisfied even if you were the cover of GQ magazine and had billions. They would complain if their ice cream were too cold. Is it a hook up site? Yes. It is the perfect narcissistic playground with the 2% actually being a real person or actual true intentions. Tender is the same way. I have been on all three since last year. Have had little over a dozen of dates with less than expected out comes that involves drama queens, mommy and daddy issues, can't get over the ex, or hell bent on abuse from their past. I have made no real connection with anyone I have met in person or chatting with them.

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  • For women of relevant age, yeah. But your age? That's for pump and dump, and then only for guys with no standards.

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  • I used both for dating.

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  • In my opinion nobody takes online dating sites seriously at all. I've been on several (not Tinder though) and have had little to no luck. Nothing serious has ever come from them. Having said that though, yes there are guys on there genuinely looking for dating (I was). How you'd tell that though from an online site I don't know? I think all women just assume all guys on there are just looking for hookups?

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  • I met my girlfriend on Pof. Her profile included her vision of her ideal future.

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  • i'm going to say 90% of the entire internet is guys looking for hookups. This is true of dating sites as well. Just gotta sift through it..

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  • To be honest most guys use it to find girls that want any kind of relationships be it friends with benefits, relationship hook up ons whatever. It is not easy for guys finding girls like it is for girls finding guys. All my male friends are happy when some girl evenresponsds to their messages and they are fine with whatever the girl wants in terms of relationship type

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  • POF and Tinder are online versions of clubbing - a place for women and attractive guys to hook up.

    If you're looking for a girlfriend and if she has one of these installed, run for the hills.

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  • If I wanted to date you then I would rather know you from an organic interest and like you for your soul rather than how good your tinder profile pic looks.

    No one wants to date using social media. I only use tinder as a free hook up potential site and if I fail then I move onto sugar baby sites.

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    • 15d

      That doesn't make sense. No one is deciding to date someone based on how good their tinder pics are. You see their pictures, which tells you what they look like, decide if you'd like to get to know them better based on that, swipe right, if they're interested too, you get a match, you talk to them, get to know them briefly, go out on a date and if you like each other you continue going out just like any other couple. Not that complicated, I've done this many times.

    • 15d

      @Kkaos Ok but I am not afraid of rejection when I talk to a person I see in person and public.

  • Hard to know in your age group.
    I tried POF but gave up... it seems to just be single moms and overweight women.

    Tinder is okay. I've used it with some success--I think the main problem is the format encourages you to be OCD and just click to the next person available.

    OkCupid I've had better luck with.

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  • Yeah lot of them sites, people are
    1.) Looking for Hook ups

    2.) Are gold diggers

    3.) They can be catfish

    4.) Some of them are people
    with serious mental health illnesses

    5.) I would say 10 % are looking for
    real love.

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  • i have not used them before bt i even know they are mainly or hook up

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  • Tinder was never a dating site. It's always been a hookup site.

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    • 15d

      It can be whatever you want it to be. It simply connects people who find each other attractive, whether they choose to hookup or date or whatever is completely up to them, just like any other 2 people who meet each other.

  • Well it depends, you get a lot of guys on tinder looking for a relationship, but a lot of Fuckboys. Genuinely it's the latter

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  • There are genuine people there. You just have to go through the dirt to find a diamond.

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  • just hook up

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  • Actually I am curious since I am I kind of am considering online dating.

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  • I use them as actual dating sites :)

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  • I seem to have better luck finding girls on tinder than pof. I don't do hookups so if they want that they can hit the road with their skanky ass.

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  • i only get nasty fat chicks that message me.

    in real life i can get 7s and 8s but online its degrading these chicks think they can have a chance. with all due humility of course

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  • It doesn't matter for what they are since women don't reply to any suggestions, hook ups or dates.

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  • The majority of guys on these websites are not serious. Meeting people online is a bad idea because people can lie online.

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    • 15d

      Much more difficult to lie with Tinder, it's connected to your facebook. However there's really nothing to worry about. Meet in a public place.

    • 15d

      @Kkaos its possible to have a fake fb account.

  • I use them. I hold faith that I could find a girl on there not just for hookup.

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  • More from Guys
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What Girls Said 18

  • some guys are genuine and others are a joke.. mostly married men hiding...
    Got talking to the genuine guys and they get it tight as well, ask them they'll tell you about girls wantin money for phone top ups to other people or men pretending to be women.. so most genuine guys give up.. plus they get ignored

    I gave up knew a guy on it that was only messaging me to remind me I was a fat ugly old cow with baggage.. yup activity sought me out to call me names.. sad for any guys that was interested in me

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  • Okc is the best. Men who take time to fill out their profiles are more genuine and you have the most info on a guy if they answer the sites questions. Best dates were with okc men for me as an intellectual. (Seems to attract more nerds) met my boyfriend of two years here.

    Pof men have been trashier and red necky in my experience though I've had good enough dates.

    Tinder is great for hookups and it's really just like going to a bar. He might want a relationship but probably not. I've had wonderful dates on tinder too but all short term.

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  • 1 year with my boyfriend I met on Tinder. Best decision of my life to join Tinder. I'm happier than ever with the best boyfriend I've ever had or could even dream of..

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  • i have a guy friend who met his fiancee on pof; they've been together for almost 3 years and got engaged last Christmas. but that's just one story~ i'm sure there are equal parts both.

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  • They are dating sites but you have to careful, some people only use them just to look around for an easy hook up and are not serious about about finding a relationship. Their are people who do want to find someone you just have to weed through them. Honestly, an this is just my opinion, I would stay away from dating, I've heard so many bad experiences.. to the point to me people these days aren't serious about finding a relationship with online dating.

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    • 14d

      Really!!! Cause I've yet to find a woman on Tinder or POF. That has not put "Not here for Hook Ups".

  • I am currently on POF and am having no luck whatsoever. I have gotten a lot of emails from guys just looking to hook up. The guys who seem decent don't email back. Not sure why. I am decent looking and certainly not crazy. I have my shit together. I feel like a lot of guys just like to look for whatever reason. Thinking of joining Match. I figure people who pay for the service are the ones who are serious about meeting someone.

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  • It depends on the person but a lot of people are not who they say they are online. Also there's are lots of crazies and psychos out there. A lot of guys these days like to use girls as well.

    But I think know a few people who have been successful and found the one online, so it reall depends on the person and on how u go about it as well

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  • I've tried Tinder before and wasn't very successful on there. I chatted with a few guys on there and decided to meet up with a couple of them. They just came across as wanting one thing. I might have just been unlucky of course. It could be that some guys are actually looking for a serious relationship on Tinder. My advice would be to take things slow and look at the guy's actions.

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  • When I used Tinder, I did just for hook ups (I got out of a long term relationship just before a ring was purchased). However, I've been seeing the same guy for over a month now (Tinder guy) and want to continue. It's a better app for hook ups, but if you want more than that, be clear to whoever you're matched with.

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  • just hook up

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  • Tinder is known as just hookup and I used pof to find my boyfriend. It shows people intention of there like to be married or casual dating

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  • Hahaha I used pof and it was bad lmao

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  • Plenty of fish is ok. Just be careful

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  • mostly hooking up.

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  • just to hang out

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  • it's what you make of it. There are people on those sites with a variety of different intentions.

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  • Mostly hooking up but I have a friend who's in a 2 year relationship with his girlfriend at the moment and they met on Tinder. I suggest putting something like "looking for the one" in your description bar. Something like that, so that it wards away hook up people and attracts people who want something serious.

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  • PoF is full of crazy people, myself included... Most people there seem to be 100% sane via texting, but when you meet them in real life, you realise why they're still single.

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