Guys, Third date and we are always going Dutch?

He is very in love but I can't help but feel weird about this. Maybe I'm wrong for it, but at least the first few times, the man pays. Maybe you can talk some sense into me?


Most Helpful Guy

  • I can't believe how many men find it acceptable to go Dutch.

    Of course he should have paid, at least the first few months.

    Do you really want to continue dating a man like that?

    • Asker, if I was you I'd have dumped him after the first date for letting you pay. Have you brought it up with him? Have you considered letting him know that you expect him to pay?

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    • Are you from the US, if I may ask? If so, which part? I'm from Europe and here it's definitely expected that men pay and I know for a fact that it's the same in Latin America.

      You should definitely NOT feel bad for expecting him to pay.

      If you don't want to mention it to him, you could try "forgetting" your wallet at home. See if he picks up the bill or acts weird.

    • I am from the US , yes.


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What Guys Said 6

  • I've always paid for the woman and traveled her all over the world. Now my new rule is the third date it's Dutch treat

    • So all a girl needs to do is go out with you for two free meals and then move on to the next sucker? Don't be that guy and split the bill on the first date.

  • That is an old notion and should not apply to an evolved person. Equal is equal. It depends on the person but doesn't make them bad or good.

    • Okay. It's just that On all of my early stage dates the guy pays, even the cashier/waiter tonight reacted funny to it.

    • People are stuck in the past. True equality means giving the other person the same right.

    • If someone wants you to pay for them would you want them to just expect it or ask.

  • You are an adult, you pay for your own things. Dating is not expecting a free ride out of him

  • He should pay without a doubt. And not just the first few times.

  • You can't demand gender equality and an end to sexism and then be sexist towards guys.

    And frankly I've had first dates where the women picked up the entire bill (she insisted). No one thought it's weird, in fact they were happy I let them and I just paid for our second date.

    How would you feel if that man told you this: 'She is very in love but I can't help but feel weird about this. Maybe I'm wrong for it, but the girl does my laundry, cooks for me and puts out every night. At least in the beginning. All of my ex girlfriends did this for me but she doesn't and it feels weird. Even my best friend reacted funny to it. Maybe you can talk some sense into me?"

    Yes, you'd probably scream "SEXIST ASSHOLE", am I right?

  • The right thing was, is and it will always be to each one pay their own shit.