I am 17 and I think a 12 year old has a crush on me. She has a boyfriend but she is constantly flirting with me. For the time being, this seems OK, but I am scared she might try to ask me out. If she does, I do not know what I will do. I have assembled a couple arguments for what I might say but in the end I want to see what other people think would be the best course of action.
If I say yes to dating her, it would be awkward because of the age difference. The weird thing is, I thought she was 16 when I met her because she looks and acts way more mature than she did. I will not lie, I had a crush on her. Once I found out she was 12, I felt extremely weird and even undignified to a certain degree. If I liked her before I knew her age, is it fair to judge on that basis? Is that too shallow?
I want to also clarify that there is no sexual intent whatsoever. I have no intention to try anything sexual at all with her. In fact, my attraction with her was based on her personality, not her sexual appeal.
Another thing is that it's only a 5 year difference. It means a lot now, but at what point would that not become awkward?
I could really use some advice on this, so I know what to do if she ever actually asks me out.
Most Helpful Girl
I'm a big believer in 'age is just a number' but because of the society we live in (and its laws) you have to draw lines to keep yourself and others out of trouble. My advice is to abide the laws. You're fine now, but think if the relationship goes well and you turn 18, you could get yourself into some really hot water.
If she's as mature as you say she is, just explain to her that there are laws against that. I know when I was 12 and I had crushes on older men I didn't really think about the law, so I don't expect her to care. Just be persistent and don't give in to urges.
5 years isn't a huge gap to me. I think after you turn 18 age really doesn't matter too much. The awkwardness comes from mostly being at 2 different stages of your lives. You'd be graduating and going on to college while she'll just be starting high school. They're completely different worlds. After 18 you're kind of on the same level.
I can't tell you want to do, but if you decide to date her just be careful. Maybe really get to know her on a friend level before. I believe that your intentions are in the right place, but I'd hate for things to turn ugly for you.1