Should mentally ill people ONLY date other mentally ill people?

Question

Okay, so here's why I'm asking.

This dude Onision (YouTuber if you don't know him) made a claim a couple weeks ago that mentally ill people i. e. depression, schizophrenia, bipolar, etc. should only date those who are also mentally ill so they don't ruin the person they're in a relationship with.

I know a lot of people think he's an idiot, perv, or flat out think his channel just sucks, but do you agree with his opinion about mental disorders?

For those of you who don't know, Onision has repeatedly said himself that he suffers from depression and suicidal thoughts. And, yes, he's married, though I don't know anything personal about his wife.

sjoes006 · Accepted Answer

A very large portion of the population could be diagnosed by the DSM. We all have our issues and it just depends on whether our partner can live with them or not.

Having a scar on your knee doesn't make you unlovable nor does not being capable of passing the mental health exams to man the mission to Mars.

I've never dated a perfect person free of some kind of mental block nor do I claim to be.

Love is about acceptance and trust. If you can't trust them then that's an issue all on it's own but many people with 'mental issues' can be trusted by their loved ones. They bare their sole to you often times and only after years in many cases.

There are certain mental disorders I couldn't work with but others could and the opposite is also true.

While society makes it shameful to admit anything even as slight as a period of brief depression when your husband died, people in general are more kind in confidante.

NOW THAT SAID.

There are some, not all or a lot, men out there that fail in relationship after relationship for the same reason... she was crazy. A portion of men like to call women crazy or nasty or whatever if a woman doesn't fit their model of what a 'broad' or 'bitch' should be.

I'm not pointing fingers at any one group of people, they come in all kinds.

I dated a well off professional for months only to realize he liked a few things about me. My income capability, my downtown apartment, some of my body and my dog.

Like I think if my investment profile checked out we would have gotten married but that doesn't do it for me. He had admitted mental issues but I was fine with it and was able to help or pullback. It's not why we didn't work out.

I have extremely successful friend with mental disorders. They are married their life functions, one is a millionaire but we all have our struggles. We talk.

I hate to bring Tony Robbins into this but it's a good example that widely appeals. He comes from a background of horrible abuse and neglect. He isn't without his demons but he developed coping mechanism such as gratefulness nature walks. You just remind yourself of every tiny thing that is good in your life and be grateful not entitled to them.

We all have our shit but that isn't who we are. A psychopath isn't mentally ill. They aren't insane. It's a personality disorder. It can't be treated with drugs or counseling.

CEO's test above average in personality tests as sociopaths and/or psychopathy.

susulaila89 · Accepted Answer

I mean not everyone with a mental illness is the same, but had I not been in a serious relationship with a man with a mental illness I would have said to give them a shot, everyone deserves love. However, that is still true that everyone deserves love, but I feel if you're dealing with a mental illness, to do what you can to get the help you need to keep it under control. Mental illness is never cured, but if they refuse the help like my ex did then majority of the time they're using it as a reason to get out of stuff or for people to accept them how they are with no consequences. My ex is a big example of this. Used his mental illness as a way to get out of trouble. Why would he fix something that gets him through life with a "get out of jail free" pass? Then you got the ones who do everything it takes to help themselves, and I can honestly say they're the ones who deserve to be with whoever they want to be with. Mental illness can seriously damage your partner's mental state if they're not treated for it, and the mind is the hardest thing to repair!

iminim · Accepted Answer

As a person who is bipolar, I am afraid of getting in a relationship. I completely disagree with onision because although you have to be careful when dating someone with a mental illness, anyone and everyone should be allowed to date who they want. As long as the person who is dating the person with the mental illness knows how serious it is, and knows what they are doing, it can lead to a very good relationship and can even end up motivating and helping the person with the mental illness. That's just my opinion, I can see why people would disagree though.

Prettygurl12 · Accepted Answer

I don't agree.

However... if you want to get legal for a second... many lawyers will argue that mentally ill people can't give consent so technically they're saying that any romantic interaction with a mentally ill person is rape/assault. Which I don't necessarily agree with, either.

But as for that Youtuber... he's hardly credible. The man has a wife who is in a relationship with another female and the way they have it set up is just unusual. Plus he's just... very aggressive with his opinions.

UnknownReflection · Accepted Answer

Your options are difficult to choose!
I disagree with the statement. This guy is also idiot somehow. But it also depends on seriousness of the illness.

-People can be in love/relationship with whoever they want. There shouldn't be in any rule, law or regulation that mentally ill people "Should Not" date, be in relationship or marry with someone who doesn't fight with any mental illness. So basically someone who earned an illness out of their control don't deserve to be loved? nonsense logic. Plus, it's a personal choice if someone wants to love a mentally ill person or not. No one's business. Frankly, Love can't be controlled.

-In the statement the Youtuber says "We deserve what we give others" a mentally ill person never force anyone to be in relationship with them. No mentally ill person giving their impacts down to other's throat by force. Can't handle it, don't involve. But no you don't deserve to face bitter side of life or stuck with another mentally ill person just because you got ill out of your choice. A mentally ill person deserve to be loved. That love can heal many illness on it's own.

-It depends on the seriousness of the illness. Because at some levels. The illness gets out of hands and in some unfortunate cases, the person can't be cured. That is why there are medical centers and facilities to take care of people who suffer from severe cases. When a mind of a person gets heavily out of control it can be clearly dangerous to the whole society.

-My girlfriend of six years is dealing and dealt with many mental issues. I've helped her through many of them and she barely have issues today.
Depressions, Suicidal, Cutting, Anxiety, Social anxiety, Panic attacks, Migraine,
Today she only has Migraine once in a while and little bit of anxiety. Nothing else. And i love her death.

-The greatest point here would be we today living under a billion of pressures and dealing with many issues here and there since childhood and so on. Mental pressures and illness is there for all of us. We all have some sort of issue one way or another. That is why we have Mental Illness Awareness Campaigns in U. S and across the world. Because mental illness is serious and so common. Common enough that Anxiety, Panic attacks, Insomnia, Bipolar Disorders or Traumatic Stress Disorder and similar disorders are very well common to have getting so well known to be recognized.

BasicFlake · Accepted Answer

That is not the answer at all. If you have a fire and you add more fuel, does it make the fire better or worse? If you have two mentally unstable people in a relationship then what often begins as a support mechanism often turns into a toxic nightmare. What a mentally unstable person needs more than anything is stability.

The ideal scenario is that they get help and they normalise themselves as much as possible before entering into a relationship, thus giving them the best chance of making one work out.

RJGraveyTrain · Answer

No. I believe that who you get into a relationship with, is your business. Mentally ill or not.

I-am-a-nobody · Answer

The problem with mentally troubled people is they are usually only around other mentally troubled people. Then, they don't get to see what "normal" is.

We, as a society, tend to warehouse people. We stick little kids with a bunch of (out of control) little kids in daycare. We stick them with their own age +/- 1 year throughout school and then stick them in a nursing home with a bunch of people who can hardly interact socially. It's really a pet peeve of mine.

If I had a tiny bit of depression, sticking me with a bunch of schizophrenics probably isn't going to help.

NatashaJ · Answer

I agree with him, my ex I think is mentally unstable I totally wish i never met him or dated him since I feel like he ruin my life with the things he did to me. I realize I can't deal with someone who claims he "suicidal" (I am not really sure if he real about this or not) because of his father physical abuse. I understand abuse is hard to deal with but he was abusive to me as well, its not fair to me put through hell just because you never raised right. If I found out a guy I went on a date with watch his father beat his mom and sister when he was younger, I probably never go on a date again because of my bad experience with my ex.

hellionthesagereborn · Answer

Well that means little coming from him, being as he is a very broken and twisted person by his own thinking he shouldn't be with anyone. However I believe that we are all capable of making our own decisions. I think they should absolutely disclose their issues with the person they are dating, they should do so early on and then the other person can decide if they wish to continue the relationship. Its their choice as much as the person in question and if they choose that path then it is there choice to make no one elses.

spoonman2014 · Answer

He is messed up in the head, he has had a revolving door of relationships, I believe a general discharge from the military because he failed to see that basic training is designed to get you used to be being stressed, failed SERE school because he failed to notice the teamwork aspect of it was mad he was in security forces because he might have to shoot someone.
Anyways dating the mentally ill is crazy but having two mentally ill people together is a catastrophe. They need to get better before they date honestly

navychick2006 · Answer

I suffer from Military Sexual Trauma, which correlates with PTSD in many cases, and I don't have any interest in dating until I overcome it. With that being said, I think if both suffer mental illness they might have common ground and a better understanding of what the other person is dealing with but that doesn't dictate that they should only date other mentally ill people.

cheapshotbob · Answer

he is probably one f those poeple saying you can't d this and then does it himself so he can't be associated with them if he is seen in public or some junk. and he is just a kid so why take something a kid says serious when nothing but gibberish comes from there mouth?

he is not old enough to know any kind of life lesson which bothers me because of what he claims to know when he hasn't lived long enough to know what love really is. or anything else is banters on about

fauchelevent · Answer

I don't think so... I'm mentally ill, my partner isn't. I think it works just because he's incredibly laid back and easy-going about most things so my anxiety doesn't particularly faze him. Perhaps if he was more highly-strung too, it'd be a problem, but right now my mental illness doesn't seem to have any negative effect on our relationship. I imagine that if I was with someone else who was mentally ill and exhibited the same symptoms as me, it'd be an incredibly toxic situation.

kilowatt04 · Answer

Not only do I disagree on a moral level, but also a practical level, especially if it is the same mental illness. Who is going to be there to help when both partners are having a bad time? It's kind of like if two partners had a physical disability, especially the same one, like they would have a hard time helping each other out. Sounds like this guy has no regard for the well being of mentally ill people though with that second comment.

April10 · Answer

I actually agree. I don't think anyone should be in a relationship unless they're capable to handling one. I don't think people with serious mental illnesses should date anyone. They should focus on themselves. That said, if they get into a relationship with someone who knows about their illnesses and struggles and they're ok with it, then who isanyone to say they shouldn't date.

scarlett96 · Answer

Well to be fair everyone is a bit neurotic at some point in their life and mental illness is a slippery slope that's hard to define on a continuum. With that being said, two consenting adults if they truly love each other should be able to be together regardless of what others think.

SarahsSummer · Answer

Mentally ill people should get help before embarking on a romantic relationship. Once they have things under control they should be free to find and love whomever they want and as with any relationship, honest communication is paramount.

Kurodo · Answer

onision wishes that were true but for as long as people can be attracted to another person its not gonna happen. some people at least will fight that good fight together with that person with problems and even if it might not end well thats the choice they made and we dont get a say.

Nadzzz · Answer

To those who said no
Would YOU date a mentally Ill person?
I wouldn't
But you're all pussies cause you know how to say stuff and make moral and shit but when it comes to YOU , you wouldn't date one that's it!

BelleMmichelle · Answer

Onision is a notorious internet troll. Stop validating him with an audience, he's been doing this for YEARS. He writes charged statement and records absurd videos for views and to remain relevant. Stop the madness

Bvroon · Answer

No, I say this because my wife has mental health issues, gratefully she is in counseling, but I also help her a lot and I very much love her despite her issues.

Benk111 · Answer

How could you possibly know if someone has a mental disorder or not? every disorder isn't like autism were it's starting you in the face. With most that have people with disorders you would never guess unless someone told you.

Tanairy328 · Answer

Does anyone seriously ever take advice from onion boy?

Prof_Don · Answer

"Mentally ill " is so subjective.  Ex. Some people may consider a high level of narcissism to be mentally ill.

cth96190 · Answer

I have had enough to do with crazy women that I have learned to run for the exit at the first sign of crazy.

Should mentally ill people ONLY date other mentally ill people?

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