Do you think dating is hard for men?

Lets look at this. First you can't meet girls anywhere.

1. Can't meet them at the bar/club because no girl wants to tell their mother that they met there.

2. Can't meet a girl who you work with, because its unethical.

3. Can't meet a girl at a place of business,where she works, because, again, its unethical.

Considering that most of a mans time is going to be spent at work, and then when he has time off he's going to either go to a club/bar or go to a place of business, his options are pretty limited.

Now, that's just the location.

Cant really talk to girls if they are in a group of 2 women, if you are alone, because the other girl is going to feel left out.

Cant really walk up to a group of women with another guy at the same time, because it creeps them out. (a bunch of dudes walking together as a group talking to women is intimidating and weird.)

Cant really be yourself, because yourself sucks. (for most guys.) Most guys "themselves" is not approaching women and sitting home and playing world of Warcraft. What's a guy like that to do? walk up to a girl and say "hey, what level is your paladin?"

And what's even better is that "yourself" as a man wants to say "hey I like you" as the first words that comes out of a mans mouth.

Which typically for most women, they find "creepy". They think "he doesn't know me, why does he like me?"

Every single "natural" I've ever met has always gone through trial and error... they were not "born" with the right personality to approach women, NO.. they tried things, and failed just like any man who plays world of warcraft.

They all eventually learned that men have to be funny, witty, charming, tall, good looking, rich, somewhat muscular, and dominant.

And most of all "original"

You don't want to say the same thing that some other guy just said to them, or you are a loser, even if your intentions are the best, and that you are just too nervous to say anything else... it doesn't matter, she's going to dismiss you anyways.

To make matters even better for men, women have what I call "pickup moods" several women I know got boyfriends with particular things that the man did.

If another man did the same thing to them, after moving on from her last boyfriend, she would put up all these "walls" and not give the man a chance.

Sometimes women go out also, and they do not "feel" like being approached. So no matter what you do, they are not going to respond well to your advances. (at least not initially, you can do things to get through this, but it makes it A LOT tougher to connect with someone) And even then, she's not going to be receptive to you initially..

And all of that is just meeting a woman... I haven't even touched on women's tests, and other games they play.

Now compare this to women... where all you have to be is hot, and not a bitch.

Pretty nice.. isn't it.

Sure you can say that not "all" women play games and act this way.

The ratio is this.

80% of women are like this

20% are not.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • You make it sound so gloomy for men, and you sound so pessimistic. No matter how valid the points you make might be from your perspective, your pessimistic attitude is possibly what might be keeping you single (I'm assuming you are, after this rant). Women probably face a similar / related set of obstacles when it comes to dating. However, all the couples of all ages, shapes, and colours around us are a living proof that men do indeed, in this day and age, find themselves women. I think your attitude is disastrous, really. I don't know if you subconsciously want to keep yourself single (again, seems like you are). And, as you guessed, my response to your question would be - no I don't think dating is harder for men

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    • There are 3 ways to respond to any question or any conversation.

      1. Negative. (which attacks the person)

      2. Neutral (which is simply talking it out)

      3. Positive. (which is always looking for the positive intent and offering advice.)

      There really is no value in attacking someone indirctly or directly. Instead of attacking someone and saying "oh you must be single, or you are pessimistic." Its much better to offer advice or ask questions.

      Otherwise you aren't helping anyone.

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    • And as far as a woman agreeing with me on this subject.. here's one

      http://www.amazon.com/Save-Males-Matter-Women-Should/dp/1400065798

      She writes an entire book on this same subject, whereas I just wrote something that's like one page.

    • I didn't mean to come off as attacking you. I assumed you'd like to get a date / relationship, and possibly mistakenly assumed so, and based on that I offered my opinion. I appreciate your detailed response.

What Girls Said 1

  • So what if you're not a hot woman? Then their struggles don't matter? What I get from your thought process is this: If she doesn't like you, it's her fault. If you don't like her, it's her fault (she's not hot!) Pretty nice to absolve yourself from any responsibility with your dating problems.

    The majority of women are unhappy with the way they look, I'm talking 97% here. In a study done in Britain, 97% of women hate the way they look. Take that 97% and tell me - where does that fit in your equation of hot, bitchy women who play games? How can a woman be hot if she hates the way she looks?

    You're basing all your assumptions from a male perspective - you have no idea what it's like to be a woman or the struggles women personally face with relationships and romance, which means you have no basis for your rant except your own unhappiness.

    Take responsibility for your inability to meet women. There are men out there who don't have a problem with it at all. Not all of them are handsome or rich and none of them blame women for their own inadequacies.

    I'm not trivializing the social pressure men have to deal with, like you are trivializing the pressure women are under, I'm just saying you can't compare the trials men go through with what women go through. We deal with different things because there are different expectations for each gender. It doesn't make one less than the other.

    Life can be hard for everyone - don't lessen what someone goes through just because you've never had to deal with it.

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    • Ok this is not a rant, its just a comparison. Comparatively speaking men have it harder than women. The problem isn't that men don't have any responsibility when it comes to dating, the problem is that they have ALL of the responsibility. Lets compare hot women VS hot men. Firstly hot women have it way easeir than hot men. Hot women just stand there and men want them, "just" because they are hot. Hot men its not the same way, for "most" women, being a good looking guy, just isn't enough.

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    • I invite you to take a look at a few books on this subject

      http://www.amazon.com/Myth-Male-Power-Warren-Farrell/dp/0425181448/ref=sr_1_6?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1278756508&sr=1-6

      And this one is written by a "Woman"

      http://www.amazon.com/Save-Males-Matter-Women-Should/dp/1400065798

    • "The book is basically a series of fast-paced, sometimes-hilarious essays that examine the way America has veered a little to the womanist side in education and popular culture, and how our men and boys have been short-changed in the process. I am a woman and have three daughters and was frankly surprised at how true Parker's argument rang."

      Another woman who agrees with the writer.

What Guys Said 3

  • I think you gave this way too much thought lol. But you bring up some interesting and valid points. Men do have it hard, when it comes to dating. Many expect us to be the initiators and the ones who should be doing the chasing. We also have many barriers to overcome, you listed quite a few. But I don't think you are being a bit fair to women. They have it hard too. I've said it once and I'll say it again, women bring so much more to man's life than a man does for a woman. That's not feminism talking, that's admittance. Women do the child bearing, bring the household together, the nurturing, they have to look nice all the time, smell nice, compete with other women, have to compete with other men at the job level, have to put up with predators, men who just want sex, and the list goes on and on. So obviously both sides have it tough.

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    • I said dating, not marriage/relationship.

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    • Ok what do women have to offer? children? most men don't want kids..."most"

      Companionship? most men have more fun talking to their other male friends than most women.. because with your friends, you can be yourself, you don't have to worry about tests.

      What do men have to offer? Money? stability? safety?

      Do most women want children? Yes.

      You ask most women and they will tell you that they get long with men a lot better than they get along with other women.

    • Many women just marry men for money too. so who cares if men leave after having a kid.. again, I bring up child support and laws. Again, that's moot. that's equal. The law makes it unequal. Dating is tougher for men, and after that, relationships are tougher for men because of the law.

  • Wait a sec. So if men cannot meet women anywhere then it would logically follow that women could not meet men and have it equally as hard. It doesn't make much sense that women could have such an easy time meeting men if men are so hard pressed to find a woman, does it?

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    • Obviously when I said that, that was an exaggeration, if you read clearly enough I set specific examples that are not all inclusive. Which I made clear when I said it was a limitation.

      And its only hard because women make it that way. If women didn't care about what other people though about where they met there, man there wouldn't be an issue.

      Men don't care where we met a woman, as long as we meet one.

  • it's only Initially harder for Men, that's all

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    • If a woman cheats on a man in a marriage, the man still has to give up half of his money, and even if he was faithful. Also child support.

    • Yeah, well that's just my personal opinion, I feel women have it easier during intial encounters

    • Marriage laws are not my opinion they are fact. look them up.

      and yes women have it easier during intial encounters that's for sure.

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