and it's made it so hard for me to be confident around guys. He always said that he thought he was pretty but that it was hard to date me because all of his friends always asked why he was dating me because I was ugly. I don't think I'm crazy hot or anything and I don't think I'm ugly but I'm wondering if guys are seeing something different. My girl friends always tell me that I'm cute, and my guy friends say that I have a nice body, and I work at hollister who supposedly doesn't hire ugly people but whenever I'm around a hot guy I feel like I'm just not going to be good enough for him and that I shouldn't approach him because he'll think that I'm ugly and would rather be with someone who looked better. Obviously I wasn't in the most healthy of relationships but he told me so often that he got so much sh*t for dating me that it's made it so hard for me to feel good about myself around guys I'm attracted to. Is there any way I can change this? I feel like because of it I either shut guys out who do show any interest in me because I feel like at some point they'll find something wrong with me and leave me for someone better or convince myself that I shouldn't even try to get a guys attention because he won't want anything to do with me anyway.
My ex always told me that no other guys would date me because they thought I was ugly?
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What Girls Said 1
Hey there girly.
I understand where you come from, I came out of a relationship where he told me how stupid I was and so it made me concerned that that was how the rest of the world perceived me.
People often need to say hurtful things to others to make themselves feel better. He wanted to make you hurt and feel so low that you would always be under his power, so he could grab and drop you whenever he wanted, and that you wouldn't feel good enough about yourself to think you were enough to be with anyone else. He obviously is a control freak and has issues far more than what you feel.
But honestly, everyone perceives everyone differently due to their experiences in life and what they are attracted to. Not everyone will think your beautiful, and I'm sure not everyone will think you are ugly. People, especially as they are older and mature learn to look a little past looks which fade to the personality that shines through that. But sometime soon you will catch someones eye to just has to have you, and your personality will shine through past the image. And when you find that person who looks past the image you'll realize that the loser from before was literally just a loser, and you proved him wrong :)
Hope that helped a little.
Stay strong! :)0
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