My fiance and I were having a lot of problems. In the mean time, he started working on a project with a female coworker (she's married) which he later introduced me to. (maybe 2 weeks after they'd been working together everyday).
I didn't like her and told him straight that she's immature. My fiance confided in her about our problems and she encouraged him to break up with me.
So I called her and bitched her out. I said that it is not her place to decide. I also asked her how she would feel if I did the same to her husband?
That same day, my fiance and I had a fight and so I left the apartment for the weekend. That weekend, he and her and some coworkers went out. with some alcohol, they kissed.
He later told me about a week after the incidence. I said to him I am not surprised. I sensed that he had developed some sort of emotional affair with her and that kissing was a something bound to happen when alcohol is involved.
At first, he wasn't sorry. he blamed a lot on our problems. then later, he said he's really sorry. and that he had stopped talking to the co worker. he said he also hates her now.
I am HURT. I questioned myself if I really know this man. I always thought of him as a faithful, loving person. I know that we were having problems, but I didn't think that SHE would be considered a solution for him.
Also, this women is married. I question her moral? I question why my fiance even chose to be so close to her in the first place?
i m so tired of thinking. please someone tell me what to do.
We are still together but I am thinking of leaving him everday.
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"At first, he wasn't sorry. he blamed a lot on our problems. then later, he said he's really sorry. and that he had stopped talking to the co worker. he said he also hates her now. "
he isn't sorry for anything...if he was he'd know WHY he was sorry and for what...he probably hates her now because she doesn't want to be involved with him or realized that he isn't what she thought he was...so he can't have her anymore and boom he's sorry for you and hates her now because she turned him away...
YOU HAVE A FIANCE its basically being married...i don't care what anyone else says, cheating is a NO NO...if you have the urge to cheat you do not want to be with that person...sure people find other attractive and even imagine "what if" but a married couple or enganged couple do NOT make moves if they are truly in love..can you imagine what he'd be doing/saying to you if you did this to him...
i'd take some time, clear your head and really evaulate your relationship, morals, and yourself to really figure out what you want as a person and if you can deal with the fact that your potential husband once cheated on you...even if it was just a kiss...but id def recommend to take soem time away from him - this means no communication, you need to see what life is like w/o him, sure its going to suck but you also can't ahve him persuading you to think a certain diretion when he's the one that messed up...
everyone will give you their opinions on here and best advice, but in the end it comes down to you...so you need to take time and really think about what you want in a man and if you can live with teh fact he kissed this married women...if you see yourself bringing this up 5-10 years from now then you're not going to want to get married to this guy - you want to know w/o a doubt that he won't cheat on you when you're married...