So it wasn't supposed to be a date but? WHAT HAPPENED? Was it?

I'm just clueless about what to do about this situation. I met this guy 2 years ago kinda felt that tummy pull, but he was leaving the country about 3 months into us working together. We kept in touch while he was gone and at some point I admitted to having a crush on him. He said he didn't feel the same. Fast forward to now. He just got back and I had asked him when I might see him again, he suggested we get together and have ice cream at a place we'd had it together before. I said maybe. I just wanted to think about it a bit be sure I could handle it. So then later I said sure but it would be a couple of weeks. He told me to let him know when I was free. So yesterday, we met up. I was under the impression that we were doing it as friends. Nothing more, nor did I expect more. We were supposed to have drinks but he immediately asked if I wanted to eat, which I thought meant he was hungry so I said sure. Things went fine I thought during the ordering and then the food came, he offered me a vegetable at the same time I was eyeing it and wanting it instead of fries and I accepted and he even picked up his plate and put some on my plate. I thought that was sweet and nice. Everything was fine we made periodic eye contact while we ate but he was really into his food. Until he asked about a mutual friend of ours, at which point I told him it was a bad subject and the guy was inappropriate, that he had kissed me. He drops his fork stares at me like I'm from mars for a second and goes "he kissed you?" and I said yes. He asked then, "was it a real kiss?" and I was kinda shocked by his level of interest and was like um yea.And I explained how I had told the guy I wasn't interested in him and that I no longer spoke to him because of this action of his. Well things got weird after that. For the rest of the afternoon every time we started to talk, even if he initiated the subject he couldn't stay on topic, he would break in with a joke which got really annoying and frustrating. When the bill came I offered to get it because I knew he wasn't working yet but he refused so I paid the tip. We left together but that was weird too, he asked me to walk out with him and I did but he didn't hold the door for me he kind of burst through it (all other times I've been with him he held the door for me) when I got to my car he said something and kept going to his car. By the time I got my keys out of my purse, he was off the parking lot. I went WOW what just happened here? Was I on a date and didn't know it? Was he shocked by seeing me or something? I admit, he'd never seen me look like a girl before, we worked long hours and I only ever wore jeans no makeup and a ponytail. I looked very different I guess than he remembered. But why would he act so weird? He's told me before that he was shy, but this is the first time I've ever seen him act this way...he's usually very relaxed and confident. Help? Insight? Should I talk to him again? I really like him and would love to.


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What Guys Said 1

  • Sounds like it was just two friends that were going to hang out, catch up on old times, etc.. I'd imagine when he saw you, he immediately felt attracted to you. It sounds like you guys started flirting with each other, but he started to get a little jealous and impulsive when you told him about a past bad experience with a guy; that part is kind of weird because why would a guy be p*ssed at you for hanging out with male friends?

    Sometimes, friends will avoid calling it a date just to make sure that it doesn't make anything awkward between you two.

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    • Sooo a little lipstick and he suddenly can't talk to me? Wow OK. I haven't dated in a LONG time but I somehow felt like it was a date in his mind. Or something. I really want to see him again but am afraid to call him and equally afraid he won't call me.

    • What do you have to lose by reaching out to him? Be open with one another to furthermore avoid any confusion and heart break.

    • Honestly I'm really wanting to talk to him but he was SO jumpy and all over the place that I think that might set him off all over again. I was thinking maybe to give him a few days?

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