Guys- What are your thoughts on dating a woman with children?

I am a single Mom with 2 young daughters, and I am just curious what the majority of men are REALLY thinking about it. I personally would not bring a date around my kids unless I knew it was a serious relationship. Anyways, does it scare you away as soon as you find out she has kids? Does it depend on how her kids are? (lol) Cmon, spill it all! Thanks! :-)


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Most Helpful Guy

  • If you're not talking about relationships by accident, where people actually go out and seek the people they want to date and then find out about your kids and say "no thanks". Well, quite frankly, most men choose not to get into relationships children are in the mix for the same reasons couples use birth control. It's an undesired responsibility and complication to the relationship and there are plenty of other women out there without kids, so why put yourself through the hassle and difficulty.

    The reality is that if someone you're dating isn't ready for the baggage you're bringing to the table, then the two of you aren't going to be dating very long. That doesn't mean you hide it, it just means you, and you alone, have a responsibility which includes bearing the burden that sometimes people will avoid dating you. Having kids is one of the most important decisions you can make, so if things don't work out let this be a lesson for anyone else thinking about your situation and the possible ramifications of being undateable to a good chunk of the opposite sex.

    Sometimes life isn't fair and quite frankly this is one of those times.

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    • I just wanted to update everyone in that I have met a guy (eharmony), I met him in late August... we have been together ever since. He is amazing, and he loves my girls just as much as me. He wouldn't want it any other way. So..... there ARE men out there willing to date a woman with kids. He said I am more than worth the added stress of my having kids.

What Guys Said 5

  • No chance. Women with children wouldn't even get a second look from me. I don't plan on ever having any kids of my own, don't see why I should help raise another man's

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  • When I was younger, I avoided dating women with kids because they tended to be more interested in getting married than in getting to know me. Now that I am already married, I find less impediment to dating women with children because most of the people I date are married with kids.

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  • its not the "looking for a daddy" that has men running. but men when we think about a relationship with a woman we want to be number 1 on her mind, not number 2.or an afterthought.

    heck, take a look at women personal ads some time:

    "my children come first" or my child is the best thing to happen to me!"

    after seeing stuff like that, yea men will feel the wind has been knocked from his sails!

    we understand the protective nature of a mother.but single men are not out to marry a "mother" we want a WOMAN. so the question to the ladies might be.how do you see yourself FIRST, are you a woman first? or a mother first?

    if you see yourself as a mother first.then stop asking why men run away! men know its a fight we only look foolish fighting! so why bother?

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  • in our age group, most men would NOT date women with children, unless they already have some themselves.

    I would not date someone with kids, sorry!

    they key is to PUT YOUR KIDS FIRST!

    Many single mothers worry too much about finding a guy that they pay less attention to their kids; don't fall into that trap. You're better off trying to talk to your baby's daddy

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  • As a fairly mature 22 year old guy dating a mother of a 2 year old, I personally had a hard time at first. Knowing that its not just her I'm dating is a big thing. The thing is that dating a girl with a kid is a blessing. Any woman with a kid understands true commitment. And that's what they give you, as long as you're willing to open your heart to them and their child. Most younger guys I don't think are up to the challenge though, its a lot to take on.

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    • I give you huge kudos for dating a woman with kids!! I definately think that if you are looking for a woman who wants to commit, and you can handle not being the center of attention 24/7, then dating a woman with kids shouldn't be out of the question!! I'm now dating a 23 year old guy who is amazing and wants to be around my kids just as much as he wants to be around me! And I have TWO daughters! Even more "baggage". If a guy is ready to "settle down".. they shouldn't count us Mommys out! :-D

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