After I broke up with my long time boyfriend, all my friends told me to start dating again. Honestly, I'm not ready, not because of my ex, I just wasn't feeling it so I really only went out with these guys as distractions so I won't be sitting home alone feeling bad for myself. But then I met this one guy, we started out texting back and forth for couple of days first before finally meet up for our date, we have many things in common and our date started out very good. However, toward the end of the date, he kissed me and we started making out, then all the sudden I freak out, I didn't know what to do and then for the rest of the night I'm no longer myself and started acting kind of weird. The date ended and he hadn't initiate any contact since. I called him finally apologizing for how I acted and he said everything is cool, he explained that he thought I was really cool until the end when he started getting a weird vibe from me, but we can still be friends. Ever since I would occasionally text him about general stuff and he would just response to my comment or questions but that's it. I really like this guy, but is it too late to undo the damages I have done to change his mind about the weird vibe I sent?
How to undo the weird vibe you sent?
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What Girls Said 1
Yes, it is too late to undo what has been done. All I can say is learn a lesson from this for the next time.
1. Don't make out or even kiss on a first date. No wonder you freaked out. You were kissing a stranger. I think a good night hug is fine but I never kiss on a first date. I don't consider a make out session until I see we are serious about each other and you shouldn't be serious until you really, really know each other, which will be many dates down the line.
2. A first date, and the second and many dates into a possible relationship it's all about getting to know someone and trying to figure out who they really are. When you freaked out, that sent a strong message to this guy that you are unstable and emotional. Face it, we think people are on their best behavior in the beginning of the dating process, so in his mind that was your "best", which means it will only get more intense later.
Also, guys just like simple and cool and though they are willing to put up with a lot more from a girlfriend or wife, they never go into dating wanting to think that eventually the woman they are with will turn into a psycho that makes them feel weird.
I am sure you are a great gal, but you cannot go back in time and change that first impression. You need to write him off and go back out there knowing what you know now.0
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