I have had this dilemma for over a year now. I guess I needed the break from dating anyone any ways to just take some time to really get to know me and figure out what more I want out of life. I think I am a pretty good person. Honest, caring, good heart. I have been told by many that I have a lot of great qualities that I should have no problems in finding a great guy and I deserve the best which I know I do. although I am unsure I really feel that I am exactly dateable.
I have been divorced for about 7 years now. I had lived on my own for sometime. Last year my ex husband (my sons father) was generous to allow not only my son come stay with him till I can make things better for myself and all. He gave me a spare room at his place. He and I have already been down the path together and it did not work out that way. We know that there is no possiblities on trying that again. We get along great as friends however there is nothing beyond that point.
I am greatful to have the chance to stay here for the fact it was a great opportunity to go to school full time and work on a degree so I have a chance to do something better for myself and have a better chance at being on my own once I do get done and get back into my own place.
When I moved in over a year ago. I had putting dating aside mostly to gather myself. But I also have reframed from even trying much because I don't feel that most guys would want to even bother. I would be the one to come out and be honest and let them know that I am living with my ex. Because I think it would be dishonest to exclude that peice of information if they were interested in me.
Although, it may be in best interest not to date and let there be any distractions while I get my degree. It hard to avoid that the heart wants what the heart wants. It wants to find the distraction that is worth it. Not forgetting about school and my degree. But to find someone that is aa great catch and make things even more enjoyable.
My quesion is, if you meet somone that you are learning that has great qualities and is a great person is all that voided and does the fact that she happens to be living with an ex without any involment with them while going to school full time to get her degree and nor currently working while she goes? does that over shadow the good with this temperary delimah? Is it really a big deal or am I just being worried too much from my own view?
Would I be taking a chance at not meeting someone special if I avoid dating all together by thinking that I just am not dateable because I am taking care of things this way. I feel in a way that if someone were to think that I am not they would be missing a chance to get to know what a great person I could be by not wanting to get to know because of it. It just has been a struggle on deciding what I should do. Any advice would be nice from outside males voices.
Most Helpful Guy
It doesn't phase me at all but then again, I date married women by preference. Most of men who make it past 30 get a lot more realistic about dating and sexual relationships. Most women have children, most women have stretchmarks and babyfat. You simply accept these as being hallmarks of being alive. Exs are also part of the picture and something you get used to dealing with. I suggest that you play straight if it comes up but chances are that really won't. Your circumstances actually aren't that unusual for this day and age.1