Well I've never been very good at actually getting women to go out with me, actually never had a girlfriend, but for some reason they always tell me about their problems and ask me for advice, so why if I show them empathy, do they still not feel attracted ta me?
Most Helpful Guy
You're suffering from nice guy syndrome. Women say that's what they want, but what most of them are really attracted to is men who display confidence and authority. The so-called alpha male qualities. Most women want security, they want to feel safe, and a man who shows them authority gives them that feeling. Being the nice sensitive empathetic guy all the time doesn't give them that. That's what they get from their friends. This is also why lots of girls date one douchebag after another. They are attracted to the confident bravado which people often falsely associate with authority and dominance.
That said, you don't have to act like a jackass to show that you have authority. Altruism and a willingness to accept responsibilities in order to help others also shows confidence and authority. It shows that you are doing well enough that you can take care of others and not just yourself. Lots of women are attracted to that. Another thing that helps is just being the "leader" among some social group. Any social group will do. It's as though women can smell the confidence of a group leader from miles away.1