What should I do if my boyfriend is ignoring me?

ok so me and my boyfriend are in an online relationship (I do not want to hear about what a bad idea this is) . We met about 3 months ago and we talked almost everyday until a few weeks ago. He is not online as often as he used to be and when he is online he doesn't talk to me unless I say hi first. I try to make conversation with him and he gives me one word answers and is really hard to talk to. It never used to be like this at all. He was always the one chasing me! He has even spoke of being together forever. I tried talking to him about it and he gave me some excuses that I was satisfied with and he said he still wants me to come visit him but then nothing changed after that. He still didn't go online as often. I think he might be just taking me for granted. Should I play hard to get and wait for him to contact me? I am afraid that could only make it worse because he might wait for a long time before contacting me. Last week we didn't talk for 6 days and I finally contacted him. I'm so confused. What should I do?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • he's being hot/cold...you are also being the same...together you are playing each other off different wavelengths...you both need to get back in synch...communicate like chess, you make a move then wait...he will make a move eventually...if no move, then it's definitely over...also consider the next time you are both talking to figure out how often you plan on talking to each other whether daily or weekly or longer

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    • How am I being hot and cold?

    • Show All
    • I agree that we need to talk a lot more often. I don't want to sound needy by asking him to talk to me more. If he wanted to talk wouldn't he just talk to me? We used to have a time when we both went online to talk but we gradually stopped doing that. I guess we could set up another time but I don't want to force him to talk to me if he doesn't want to. I wish he would just tell me if he wasn't interested in me anymore but he sayd he still is.

    • If he wants to talk, he will talk

What Guys Said 1

  • he has a tummy ache from eating too much candy...take that for an analogy as to the notion of "we used to talk a lot"...has he found new candy or is he bored with his old favorite candy?

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    • Idk I wish he would tell me so we could deal with it.

What Girls Said 1

  • I'm assuming that you've never met before in real life? I personally met my current boyfriend online. We talked every single day for 4-5 hours for a month before we met in person (for the record, it was during the summer and I had nothing better to do with my time so us talking so much was aok.) Anyway, as much s you say you don't want to hear how bad of an idea it is to have an online relationship, I personally can't imagine having a purely online relationship. We do live about an hour from each other... since I am always so busy with school and he's always busy with work, we don't get to see each other as often as normal couples. Even so, we make it a point to see each other at least every other weekend (with me either going to spend the weekend with him or him coming to see me at school for the day, since he doesn't like sleeping over since I have a roommate.) The days that we don't see each other, we talk for an hour or two, whether it be sporadic texting throughout the day or an aim convo or talking on the telephone.

    Through lots of bad romantic experiences, I have figured out that my number one dating rule is to let the boy come to you, not the other way around. If he wants to talk to you, he's going to talk to you. If he wants to see you, he's going to fight tooth and nail to see you. I know this rule is sexist, but seriously, think about it, it works, as annoying as it maybe be. That's not to say that a little "Hey, I'm just thinking about you" text isn't OK every once in a while, but he should be making the effort. You're worth it!

    Now, my point of all of this basically is that if he's not even trying to talking to you, it's probably because he doesn't want to. I mean, you don't even see him in person... for all you know, he has a real-life girlfriend and he was just online screwing with your mind. Just leave him alone. I think your best bet is to just move on and find someone that you can see and touch and feel in real life. It'll make you happier in the long run, I would know.

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    • Now that I think about it, my last relationship was almost the same. I was always chasing him, I'd have to make all the effort if we were going to have a conversation, he was always too busy to come see me even though he had plenty of time to go get stupid with his best friends. He made me out to be this crazy, obsessive girlfriend when really he was the sh*tty one in the relationship! Ater we broke up I found out that he was having sex with the girl that sat next to me in english class.

    • I'm sorry to hear that but it's not the same. He was always chasing me before this happened and I think if I back off a bit then that will fix things.

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