Is it normal to be extremely uncertain at the beginning of a first dating relationship?

I'll try to keep this short.

I have been out with this guy a couple of times. We really enjoy each others' company, and aside from a slightly awkward moment on our first date, it's been pretty great.

We are not "officially" dating though. I know if it were up to him, we would be, but he's respecting my decision (or lack of decision?) to wait on it.

I don't know why, but I am extremely uncertain of making it official. I can't figure out why that is either. He is a very sweet, caring guy, and we get along so well and are so similar. But sometimes when we're together (and in public) I feel very aware of everyone around me. And I feel like people are judging us because we're together or something.

It's weird, and I don't get it at all.

Could this all just be because I've never been in a relationship before, and I'm just too comfortable being by myself?

Part of me is saying to definitely go for it, because what if no other guy ever shows interest. But then another part is saying don't be stupid, you're still young, there are plenty of other guys out there.

I'm sorry this kind of jumped around, but I guess what I'm asking is, is it normal to feel this way, right before the potential start of a relationship? And do any of you have any advice or thoughts on this?

Thanks!


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Never jump into a relationship or pronouncement of officially dating because you may fear no other guy will show interest and you better take what you have now. I get the fact that you honestly don't believe this is your last chance and also you are comfortable being single. However, to me, when you feel this uncertain about someone, it means that the chemistry is not there for the two of you to go the distance and you are better off not dating him further.

    Sweet and caring just isn't enough to qualify anyone for relationship status. You probably just don't know what it is that will float your boat, but I know when you find it, you will not hesitate in recognizing your feelings for that guy.

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What Guys Said 1

  • You don't know what you want, or what is expected from you, dating and geting to know someone, experienceing emotions and break ups is a part of life, its a good idea to date lots of different guys to find out what you like in a relationship, guy etc...

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What Girls Said 1

  • Hmmm... I've been in this situation too and it took me a month to decide and he came over to hangout almost every day that month.. And I really enjoyed being with him... But I couldn't decide mainly because he is older than me by a few years... And the way people looked at us when together but I gave him a chance and now we're engages Lol

    But I think if you step back and evaluate the situation, you'll see that you like him. and it shouldn't matter what others think, as long as he makes you happy... And well if its not meant to be then it'll end but not tryin at all, well... Would you rather give it a chance, or always wonder if it wouldve worked?

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