Advice for Ugly Duckling Syndrome?

I am pretty shy when meeting new people. I get awkward and don't really know what to say at some points. When talking about things that I find interesting I definitely hold the conversation, but when there's nothing I don't really like talking just to talk. This is really my downfall because I am an attractive young woman, but unfortunately I suffer from "ugly duckling syndrome". I was not so cute when I was younger and didn't blossom till I turned 20. My self-confidence is low. I really only approach guys if I've been drinking alcohol, otherwise I never do it and wait for them to approach me... but that doesn't happen too much cause I think they're intimidated. I've been single for about 8 months now and I'm definitely ready to start dating again and meeting guys but my self esteem is shot. Is there any advice for approaching guys or raising self confidence in yourself?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • I totally know where you are coming from. I used to be really ugly and so when I changed on the outside my insides still felt like the ugly girl even though I constantly am told how beautiful I am even my total strangers. I'm really shy and guys have even told me I'm just too hard to talk to so they don't even bother and it really messes with your self confidence! I think you've just got to put yourself out there and don't be afraid to feel good about the way you look, if you saw some beautiful guy who is really shy and doesn't feel good about himself he probably comes across as snotty, I mean a beautiful person not talking to anyone and looking a bit pouty... but if he was smiling and laughing and having a good time youd wanna talk to him! so do the same just be friendly and smile a lot I have started doing that and it really makes a big difference usually all it takes is a little smile or some sign of interest for a guy to get enough confidence to come up to you

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What Guys Said 1

  • Try online dating, just keep doing it you will feel more confident and get better the more you do it

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What Girls Said 2

  • Getting approached by men has very little to do with how you look. It's all about the body language and the signs that you send them.

    After I lost a ton of weight, I thought men would be all over me. Wrong. Until I learned how to subtly show men that I was open to contact, I'd be the one sitting at the bar all by myself while all my friends were getting picked up.

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  • You have to let go of the past because its not true anymore

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