Why does it seem like women are more cold hearted than men?

Question

They will just stop talking to you without explaining anything.

This is just one of many examples of my experiences: Me and a woman go on a few dates, she calls me first after second date and we start talking everyday for a few days. Our conversations are great but then after 4 days she gets a call in the middle of talking to me and says she'll call me back. She doesn't call and when I message her a few days later I get no replies and it's been almost two days since that.

Like what is this all about? Was I supposed to call her even though she said she would call me? I highly doubt I said anything wrong so to not even answer is like WTF!

I could give a lot more examples but I don't want to write a book here lol.

Samsen · Accepted Answer

Regarding "cold hearted":

I'm more or less quoting somebody here:

Example: Let's say, the question asker is ... 24. He started going out to parties at 18. He goes in avverage to 2 parties or events a week.

Makes 624 events.

Let's assume his sister (same age) did the same. How often does a girl / women get approached per evening at a party? Let's just say once... OK, twice. A lot more in fact but this example will work to show you:

1248 times "Hi, how are you?", "Hi, what's your name?", "Hey, you are beautiful!", bla...

I'm not putting the rest of the week into account (school, work, shopping mal...) just add that and you get the point.

And now think if you would take the time tell 1284 times a nice story like "sorry, I liked you but blah blah..."

---

Your question:

Seems you never managed to make her "like" you. You mannaged to be interesting at first but something went wrong on these conversations.

Solution: More conversations and more training on these!

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superdudeman · Accepted Answer

The best example I can give you is this:

Say you walk into a club and start talking to 2 women. They seem really into you, (and they are) but then you say or do something that lowers their emotional state to where they don't "feel" the same connection.

Are they going to logically go (wait a second, this guy is hot, an I think I like him, I'll stick around and ignore that feeling)

NO.

Thats what guys do. If we teel a woman is a bitch were going to ignore that feeling if were attracted.

Women don't give ANY man that luxury.

No instead, in the club, if they see a shiny disco ball, or a man that is doing cartwheels behind you that makes them feel "excited" they are going to ignore you, because they "feel" bored or whatever, and go to the next shiny object.

What that means is you said or did something or didn't do something that would make her want to call you back.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

It seems like women are more cold hearted than men because you don't date men. Of course women are going to seem more harsh to you because that's what you've had experience with and it personally affects you.

Men can be just as harsh but it "seems" that women are more cold hearted because, well, you don't date guys! So how would you know the depths of cold heartedness of men? Furthermore why would you even care about men being cold hearted since they aren't going to be that way with you?

Also no offense but if a girl not talking to you anymore after 2 dates is one of the most cold hearted thing that's ever happened to you, consider yourself very lucky. It's not that big of a deal.

Jo___ · Accepted Answer

Woman I find these days, especially being one. We have made a wall for ourselves. In a majority of female minds, good guys that just want to date without the requirement of sex do not exist. I think also that women are more harsh these days because the media influence on us, and to be honest women are just sick and tired of being hurt by men. Men are harsh too and after being hit so many times with that harsh wind, I believe that females get immune to it and just put everyone in the same boat ( when it comes to men)

weeknee · Accepted Answer

You are probably a rebound and she probably has a long term on-and-off-again that takes up a lot of her time.  I'm sayin' this because that's why I ignore guys I date for awhile, haha.

AmandaYVR · Answer

Change the word from cold-hearted to avoidant and indirect, and you'll begin to understand. Oh and add a dash of social anxiety too. And declining communication skills, on account of technology.

Is it good/right? Nope. My sympathies. I think it's rude, and while many actually do think it is the kinder method than telling a guy she's just not interested, or she changed her mind, or she's busy or preoccupied, I do not agree. I think they need to learn how to be much more direct, yet still kind, and not waste guys' time.

Now on the flip side, I suggest guys spend a bit more time getting to know the girls. Be more selective in who you reach out to, and don't try a clear-cut/wide net approach. Girls feel like some guys are not putting real effort into choosing them (blame your guy peers for that one - they're just playing a numbers game), so the girls justify this avoidance technique, thinking that the guy doesn't really deserve their time and respect anyway. 'He's just a player.'

Overall, girls are still being chased, not chasing nearly as often, and this is giving them a false sense of value in themselves.
And the shy ones, and rude ones, are using technology to 'not pick up the phone.'
And from their perspective, if the guys were higher calibre, more appealing, they would make more effort and reciprocate.

So it's probably a combination of these, most likely.

Fruitloopes007 · Answer

It seems that way because you are a man.  You had to deal with whatever women have done to you & you understand men better.  For me, it has always seemed men are cold hearted.  I've always seen women genuily care about others while men seem display no emotion.  It is because men & women are different & express themselves in different ways.  You just need to understand women better & I need to understand men better.

TheCheshireCat · Answer

It's not a gender thing, it's a people thing.  Some people are cold hearted, men & women.  You just have to receive the cold heartedness from women, so it's more apparent to you.  Women have to receive the coldheartness from men, so that is more apparent to them.  In the end, any person has the capability of being bad (man or woman), but people from both genders rise above the temptation & choose to be good.  We all make mistakes, but as long as we keep trying, that is all that matters.

TC123 · Answer

When it comes to confrontation and aggression women will not do it to your face. What this means is that women are more likely to "lash out" in detached ways. However I don't think that's the case for you - try calling her again at a similar hour to the other calls you made (if you talk a lot in the evenings that's a good time). If she doesn't respond just forget her and move on - maybe you p*ssed her off, maybe she's a ding-dong, whatever it is don't worry about it.

Anonymous · Answer

Just because you've had a few bad experiences doesn't make the whole female gender more cold-hearted. I would say it's about equal.

Anonymous · Answer

Could be anything family crisis, someone died, or a guy asksed her to marry him  or she jus blew you off the impotant thing is if she doens contact you it means she's not into you and you can keep looking for miss right or miss right now

foolycooly1001 · Answer

girls are generally more cowardly about not being direct

Soul_Mountain · Answer

It's because that phone call was from Chad, her ex.

Why does it seem like women are more cold hearted than men?

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