Should I text him or wait?

Me and this guy dated on and off from April-June. Something happened and we ended up splitting. We've been on and ff ever since then. We'll go a month without talking and then he'll randomly text me. And then my friends will get involved (they don't like him) and he will end it again. Well, recently, on thanksgiving, he texted me. I ended up chilling with him that Saturday all day (he asked me too) and everything was good. I texted him the next day and we were talking, and then I texted him on his birthday (that Tuesday) and said happy birthday, he replied saying thanks, but that was all. And then this past weekend he ended up texting me and was being like "please come see me!" and stuff like that so I ended up chilling with him o Sunday. But after I left this house, I didn't text him. I wanted him to text me. So Monday went by and we didn't talk either. I ended up texting him "hey" on Tuesday but he hasn't replied. It's not Friday. Should I go ahead and text him again, or just wait for him? Or what to do I do in general? He likes me. He tells me he does and then he begs to hang out with me, and then we do, afterward we go for a bit without talking.. He told me when we first started talking again that he had another girl he was talking to, but he didn't think they'd work out. I dunno, please give me some opinions.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • From the sounds of it, I think your playing with someone who has no intention of making a commitment. You mention he has another girl he was talking to- well there's your answer into whether or not you should pursue him.

    You have placed yourself in a hurtful relationship and now you are doing nothing short than playing with fire. He has not only you, but other women as well. The relationship has been thrown into his court and now he has it that when he wants you, he'll have you. Hence, why he only texts you when he wants and when he does, it is only to tell you to see him. Have you noticed he has put little to no effort to seeing you? He can't even text you when you initiate contact.

    You have also mentioned your friends do not approve of him. You must take a reality check and look closely as to WHY they don't like him. Your friends must play a key role in your relationships because they often times see things you do not. Your friends want nothing less than the best for you and they know what truly makes you happy, so take their advice and wishes to heart.

    I think this relationship will only lead to future pain and it is best you let it go. He has chosen to date you, among other girls, so he truly does not respect your feelings or wishes. If he has you in his life, why keep other girls within arms reach? I think he is beginning to manipulate you because he knows he can.

    You can flip the table and put the ball in your court, if you wish, by simply ignoring him. Play hard to get- don't see him when he wants you to. Don't answer his calls right away, let him chase you. This will get him more than anything. Do not initiate contact, instead, let the phone ring and answer later that night or the next day. By him doing this to you, you can see firsthand how playing hard to get really works.

    However, I don't think pursuing him or this relationship is worth it. I'd say move on, date other people who are much more respectful of your time and emotions. Your young and beautiful so find someone who does not play games and would be more than willing to answer your call.

    Best of luck!

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What Guys Said 2

  • You really need to talk to him, in person. Maybe text him organizing a time to hang out, and when you do hang out, sometime during it, say something casually like, "So, I was just wondering, where is this going?" Just discuss that with him. And be truthful about where you want this to head - whether you want to have a serious relationship or not. If he says he's not looking for something serious, that would explain his not texting you for a while after each time you hang out. If he says he is, then bring up the fact that a lot of the time, you guys don't talk at all. But don't make the talk too long, because then it'll just get uncomfortable and maybe even annoying or boring. Good luck with him! :)

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  • go for it!

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What Girls Said 4

  • He's not serious about you. He's very unstable, comes and goes. If he were serious about making things work, you'd be hearing from him consistently. It's December now and you've spent way too much time pining over him. He may beg to hang out with you sometimes, but then you don't hear from him for a month. Basically, he likes you around when he's bored. Do you hook up when you hang out with him? That could be what it's about. Just move on. He'll have more respect for you if you do. Right now he sees you as a back up plan.

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    • we don't hook up like have sex, but it's like when we hang out it's kind of like were a couple. like we cuddle and kiss and stuff. like cute stuff.

  • it sounds to me like he is getting confused there..is he not tlking to "you" because of the other girl he claims he is tlking to.. the answer I would not kno but bsmart bout every action yu do in my opinion I would say no...because if its because of that otha chick then y botha being da 2nd girl I'm sure yu are a wonderful person and if he wants to be playing mind games and not tlk to you let HIM realize that yur not like that . if anything yu want to let guys kno that yur worth being treated special than anyone else ...and if yur friends dnt like him der has to be a good explanation for dat..seeking for advice from good friends doesn't kill yu :)

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  • He has some level of interest in you, but perhaps he just isn't wanting a relationship right now and is just wanting something casual and laid back?

    Regardless, I think you shouldn't text him again until he talks to you. You made the effort, it's his turn now. In the mean time, don't let yourself sulk or obsess about it, and definitely don't turn down any other prospective guy opportunities.

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  • don't text him anymore. he was lonely and you were there to kill time. let it go

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