I told my parents that I'm dating a older guy and they freaked...

im 17 dating a 19 year old. I've been going behind there back trying to see them and the other night they found out I wasn't where I actually was and I confessed to them that I was dating a older guy and they flipped out. I told them that he wants to meet them and make sure its okay for us to date, but they were just being jerks about it.

i need advice about talking to them about this because I don't know what to do or say. I'm so emtionally messed up, its crazy


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Most Helpful Guy

  • The age gap between you and your fella is very small, so I can't understand your parents apart from the fact that they are just trying to protect you, so have another chat with your parents and let them know that its only 2 years gap and that he is totaly responsible and not one of these jerks you hear of at the ages 19, and if they would just give him a chance ie invite him round to dinner one day, they could judge for themselves on what kind of character he had and wether he was what they felt someone who could look after you and guide you away from harm, all this is done very easily as long as your boyfriend shows respect when he is around your parents, but make sure he puts in a big effort, ie no coughing at the table or elbows on the table, and no licking his knife or plate after finishing his meal, you know all that lol, but eventually, your parents will come round and be cool, as long as you do this with respect to them in mind, good luck,x

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What Guys Said 1

  • They're probably just upset at the thought of you having sex. Anytime an attractive 17 year old girls is alone with a 19 year old guy who she likes, there's a good chance that sex will happen. And from their perspective, since they didn't know you were with him in advance and you lied about it they'll be pretty certain the reason is that you're doing him. A LOT. That makes most parents uneasy.

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What Girls Said 4

  • I highly doubt that they're mad because of the age difference, because most couples have a 5 year age difference these days. So, if you would have properly introduced him to them I'm sure they would have been fine, but that's not how things worked out. Don't worry though, most girls sneak around with a guy sometime in their life, your main dilemma now is earning their trust back. Tell them that you had a lapse in judgement and that you really want their trust back. If you're really interested in this guy and you want him around for awhile, then he has to properly show them that he's a good guy. You basically have to work from the ground up but don't sweat it, like the quote says, if you aren't young and stupid you'll never be old and wise :)

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  • Wow 19 is not that much older. I have been with lots of guys allot older than that. I used to say don't keep secret from your parents but, well now I have learned it's OK some times. If your having a good time then have fun with him. It will probably not be a lasting relationship but it can be a fun one. The excitement of a forbidden secret affair is very sexy. But don't make it to serious.

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  • maybe they freaked out because you lied about it first. If you two get serious then the best thing to do is to ask him to meet your parents. This way maybe they can build up trust for him and maybe not be so upset about it.

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  • You didn't have to tell them you were with an older guy. You could have just said, "I'm with a friend."

    If you're so emotionally messed up about your parents upset about you dating an older guy, then you might be too immature to even be dating at all.

    "They were just jerks about it" how were they jerks about it? How did you speak to your parents? Did you speak like a whiny child or a calm adult?

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