What should I say to get her to talk to me?

After me, and my ex-fiancee broke up(she broke up with me) things were okay until I decided not to go on a trip where she would be at. Then I went no contact, and removed her from everything. She started dating someone though a week after the break up, but that didn't bother me since it was her life. I thought I'd give her space this way. It's been 5 months so far.

She still checks my Facebook, and other things. And has other people checking in on me I believe. I do want her back though, and I want her to be happy if at all possible. I've been working on myself in the mean time, and have

He broke up with her Saturday though, and I was wondering how I should go about contacting her, and what I should say? Thanks ^^


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Most Helpful Guy

  • hmmmmmmmmm this is a tough one...i know this is so much easier said than done, but you need to ask yourself..."why?" ... why should you contact her? she made no effort to contact you, I applaud you for breaking contact, giving yourself and her space and you working on yourself...i'd just randomly say hey...see how she is, DO NOT SAY ANYTHING ABOUT HER BREAK UP...pretend as if you have NO IDEA THEY BROKE UP...just text or call her to see what's up and how she was...maybe say you saw something that reminded you of her and you wanted to say hello...keep it SHORT AND SIMPLE, I repeat SHORT AND SIMPLE...by texting her to say hey and that's it is great...because you're not indicated you need or want more than that...when she's asks how you are and yada yada yada just say I'm good, been keeping busy and that's it...you want to leave room open for the next time you two communicate...dont get into any details or if youve been seeing someone or currently are...you want to show her through your actions you are different...you want to take things slow (if was the turtle that won't the race, NOT the rabbit)...dont seem too overly interested in her love life or if she's seeing someone, just be cool and yourself...try to remember why she fell for you, its a slow process to show someone youve chanced but I'm in hte process of doing it to my ex of 4 years...its been a year since we broke up and I'm showing and proving this to her slowly...she dated some rebound as well...just don't get caught up in the middle of that, you don't want to hurt yourself or have her feel that she needs you when really she's trying to fill a void...be her best friend and again remind her why she fell for you, keep her laughing and entertained...if you want a week ro so from your first contact you can see if she wants to grab coffee or somethign quick (under 30 min) that way you two can catch up for real but again remember don't spill everything, you want her interested and coming back for more...this will give you the opportunity to start that spark again, seeing someoen is completely different than talking over the phone...just please remember to love yoruself and watch out for your best interests, things will take time and it won't be over night...keep her wanting more!

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What Girls Said 4

  • You should say it all but what it comes down to is what you will DO to get her back. Obviously not going on the trip is what did you in. Actions speak louder than words so you need to SHOW HER that you still love her and want her back. Depending on the kind of girl she is, plan a day or night with her. If she is the romantic type then plan a candle lit dinner that YOU made with roses and just make plenty of time to talk. Tell her how you feel and apologize for the trip even if she says it does not matter, hearing it helps. Then just be you and show her you have changed. Actions speak louder than words and showing her is a lot better then just saying it but doing both for sure gives you better chances.

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    • Yeah, I agree. I guess what's wrong is I'm afraid of us fighting again. But I'll call her and just keep it short, and try not to talk about the break up. She is definitely the romantic type, and loves roses. Thank you. ^^

  • Fighting sucks but it also says a lot for your relationship. It proves you two care enough about each other to even fight in the first place. The advice my grandpa gives me is that no matter what the fight is about, as long as you conclude it with an 'i love you' and try your best to NEVER go to bed angry, things will be okay. Just never forget to remind her you love her throughout the fight, and you will last.

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    • Yeah, she made it pretty clear to me twice that it was over, and made up things about me stalking her, and what not. Even that I would kill her current ex boyfriend. I

  • Woah okay I did not know that part...maybe you should let this one go.

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  • You shouldn't contact her. You should wait for her to contact you. Don't seem too eager.

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What Guys Said 0

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