Have you ever let your "bravado"/"ego" win over you wanting to really be with a girl?

Sorry, no offense to those who have a hard time getting a date/girlfriend.

To guys who have the confidence, been in relationships:

Have you ever let your "bravado"/"ego" win over you wanting to really be with a girl?

I've been out of the dating scene recently and perhaps I'm getting brainwashed by the media and my romanticism but...it just seems that, if a guy really wants a girl, he'll swallow his pride and go for it?

Thoughts? Opinions?

Updates:



Just to clarify, I don't mean the kind of situation of an initial meeting, getting to know her.

Let's say you are getting to know her, there's some kind of misunderstanding, and you have to choose between your bravado and laying it all on the line.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • What I'm reading your question as is: "If you really like a girl, and she did something to sorely upset you, would you let that ruin the relationship?" Answer: it depends.

    If it's something merely annoying, a personal tic a have to get used to--she brays like an ass when she laughs, for example--I'd take a few deep breaths, and figure out how to explain it to my friends. We'd roll on.

    If, however, she exposed a fatal character flaw--selfish, mean, batsh*t-crazy, unreformed bigot--then I don't *want* to explain that behavor away. I want it out of my life, so we're done.

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    • That makes sense re: "fatal character flaw"...but, to play into the mainstream attitude on here...what if she was superhort?

    • ".what if she was superhot"

      Been there, done that. The bloom on that rose fades really, really fast--instant dumpage on her superhot ass.

What Guys Said 2

  • Hi, let me tell you something.. It's not just about ''ego''or''pride'', It's just that most of us guys feel afraid that the girl would ignore or reject him, and if it happened that the girl rejected or ignored him, he would feel so bad and in the future he won't have the courage to go and talk to another girl I mean like a girlophobia lol

    And sometimes the girl shows that she wants him to talk to her and make him feel that she likes him and after he goes and talk to her, she just start to act like she's not so interested...so my point is, it's just up to you girls to decide whether you want the guy or not.

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    • Thanks for your answer...I guess I should be more detailed...I don't mean during that initial conversation/meeting. More so when there has been some exchange, some misunderstandings, etc. I can't think of a specific movie right now as an example but do you kind of get a better idea of what I mean? And, also, that's why I specified this question towards guys who have the confidence and have had relationships.

  • It's very hard to understand where you're coming from or what you're getting at. I think you must have some example in mind though.

    "You are getting to know her, there's some kind of misunderstanding, and you have to choose between your bravado and laying it all on the line."

    What I get from that is... I like this girl, but there's some misunderstanding which means I've no shot at her. My bravado and ego might say "Okay, so move on to the next girl" but instead, you think I might swallow my pride and "lay it all on the line" in order to have another shot at her? But at the expense of my ego. So in some way, I'd be appearing weak/vulnerable to get this second shot?

    If I'm wrong about my understanding, then I'm not answering your question obviously. But if I'm right, then no.

    My ego, my sense of self-worth, my confidence if you will, is the source of what basically attracts a girl in the first place. I know that, especially in the initial stages, if I appear a weak and vulnerable guy, I will be met with anything from disdain to indifference, but never attraction.

    If there was a misunderstanding which in someway gave her a negative opinion about me, then suddenly going weak and vulnerable would not change her mind. If anything it would just move me into "pathetic". So no.

    Truth is, I've made bad first impressions before. I can *usually* repair the damage without having to do anything drastic like sacrifice my ego or self-image. And if I can't, I don't worry about it. I just accept we're never going to be friends or anything else, and move on.

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    • Thanks, you've pretty much nailed it. It's an honest answer...I would like to disagree that, if the girl is worth your time/effort/love, she wouldn't be less attracted...but, maybe you're right (based on my personal experiences). As far as examples...if you watch most ROM COMs, there's always that point in the plot that creates a misunderstanding/conflict but...in the end, the guy loves the girl, so he goes for her, he makes the call, he's the first to say "I love you" sort of thing...

What Girls Said 1

  • i know that's happened to me quite a few times

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