Guys, would you date a Muslim girl?

I'm 20, and born in a Muslim family. my family and I are not that religious though. like we don't wear hejab(cover for our face,hair or body) and we can have relations with opposite sex. but we have some limits. like I can not sex with everyone! and some other examples. its not as open as western girls and not as close as religious Muslims.

so would you care about the girl religious in order to date her?!(usually I don't go on date with people I don't know, but I can go out with friends no matter they are girls or boys. but the point is I'm always worry, if I be friend with an American, what would he thinks about me and my religious, would he tend to start a relationship?)


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Most Helpful Guy

  • I'm Asian, and live in Asia, and in a marriage, so this is a theoretical question for me. However, unlike many Westerners today, I don't think we have the same biases against Muslims.

    I have a lot of Muslim friends, and think that they come in all shapes and sizes. Some are conservative, others not, and if you're in a country like Malaysia (or, even to some extent, Bangladesh), you wound't even guess for the most part that you're in a culturally-different society!

    When I travelled to Africa, I was pleasantly surprised to find that I was not a racist inwardly! The African girls were attractive to me, including those beauties from Ethiopia (of course, the issue of religion doesn't come in here as strongly).

    I think Muslims girls are both pretty and nice. As for the theoretical issue :-) of dating, I think culture and attitudes are more important than religious background. Maybe language is important too -- you need to communicate. I think a number of Westerners are just too psyched out about Muslims today (much as they were against Eastern Europeans during the Cold War!)

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    • i completely agree with you, but my q was mainly about the problems which would happen during the relationship. I mean, I'm not as free as western girls in matter of physical relationships, and since the time I have immigrated to US I have found out that for westerns its a key points which would lead the relationship...so I was just wondering if western guys would ever think about dating with a Muslim girl with all obstacles on the way!

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    • yes I completely understand u, I have immigrated to US since 2 years ago and I'm so confused about relationships...i doubt ever I can find some1 who can deal with my beliefs!

    • I know that peer pressure can be tough! You end up feeling that you're lame ... instead of just wondering what everyone else is doing (or seeing it as a social mis-match).

      Yet, it's probably not worth going against what you believe in, and what you see as right, just for the sake of fitting in! Some of my best friends (not sexual partners, because I'm not promiscuous on that front) have been Muslims. All people whom I cherish and remember fondly. At the end of the day, people are very similar

What Guys Said 27

  • I have a 14 year old son. I have told him that I don't want him dating a Muslim girl. My reasons are for his safety AND her safety. There have been too many 'honor killings' of Muslim girls who dated non-Muslim men. Even the non-Muslim men can come under attack. I know that not all Muslim men are going to kill their daughters for dating a non-Muslim man. But how can a non-Muslim father of a non-Muslim child know that his child (male or female) is not going to be in danger simply from the person he or she is dating?

    I hope that I am explaining myself well, because I am VERY interested in reading your feedback. I think that Middle Eastern women have some very beautiful features such as skin tone, long dark hair and those dark eyes, so I would not want to limit my son if he found interest in a Muslim girl if I am totally wrong on this.

    Not sure if this would affect your answer, but we are a Christian / Baptist family to add a bit to my son's background.

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    • i never thought about it in this way. I can't deny such families exist still in some middle eastern countries. I can not support their idea even though I am a muslim myself, because their illogical behavior is not related to their religion. men in such families are trying to show their power over their families by abusing the Islam.

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    • maybe that would be interesting and chocking for you if I send you some videos of the city I used to live!

      when we talk about Muslims, we are not just talking about some poor and uneducated people in some poor countries or areas! yes I can not deny sometimes they do terrible things in the name of god and quran! but that doesn't mean we all are alike or all are supporting their actions! and you also can not deny some Christians abuse god orders and bible too...

    • as I said before, I was pointing a Muslim girl limitation by asking this q! then I found out in so many other religious, decent girls would face with same limitations or conditions!

  • I don't know where you are at, but I can tell you that there have been a number of honor killings in the United States. Much of the liberal media in this country will not report on it. However, there are many sources of news to find out these things. To have this happen in the United States is very disturbing. The good thing is that these fathers try to invoke Shariah (bad spelling?) law to defend their actions. However, so far, they are prosecuted for premeditated murder which they should be.

    It is enough for a non-Muslim father like myself be very careful about my son being interested in a Muslim girl. I would not say he can't be friends with her, but I would not want it to go any further to keep her safe and him safe.

    I have a question. Suppose a young teenage Muslim couple are found out to have had sex before marriage. What would the punishment be?

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    • now I'm in texas, but actually I have immigrated to US in 1.5 year, so I'm not that familiar with such happening here :)

      i said I agree with you about this point and I'm not supporting such idea. I'm so happy that god blessed me with an open minded family who is not trying to force me of believing or doing some actions which I'm not believing in. and yes my question was mainly about physical relations before marriage not anything more. the other issues may happen refer to their personalities I guess.

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    • My last comment was not directed at you. It was directed at that 'Freeway' guy. However, I have decieded he is more interested in spewing hatred and insults because I am a conservative Christian. Liberals like him have nothing but hatred in his black heart. As for you, I am still very interested in your question. I like your most recent comments. I want to ponder them a bit.

    • This guy is clearly hateful against Muslims I see. oh wells, good to know

  • I'd date a Muslim or ANY religious girl but I wouldn't date her family and creed and it's there that things go terribly wrong: if you date a religious girl of any religion, she and her family expect you to behave according to THEIR religion. You can always try to get her away from her family and creed :-s Good luck with that.

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  • Well, not having "sex with everyone" isn't much of a limit! I would hope that many people share that idea, regardless of ideology!

    Yes, I'd date a Muslim girl. In fact, maybe it doesn't sound right, but I think I might be especially attracted, simply for the fact that anything different (as a non-Muslim myself) is sometimes a little exciting just because it is different...

    But you'll find people who prefer to date their own race, own religion, own financial class, own hair color, whatever... so of course there will be some bias from some people. But it shouldn't be something you worry about... America was founded on the idea of doing away with those differences.

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    • i mostly meant about our sexual limits. you have dated with a muslim girl so you know we are not as open as other girls and wouldn't welcome all of the physical action others girls would do and its a routine.

      so it wasn't annoying u?!

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    • yes you are right. but its what I believe in it too. its my way regardless of my religious. because actually I don't know my self as a muslim. it was just a hint to can tell people about the idea.

      i have np dating with other religious ppl, I was just wondering about how they might think

      again tnx ;)

    • I wasn't questioning your belief -- I wasn't trying to imply that *you* were following blindly.

      Feel free to send me a message if you want to talk further... you seem quite intelligent and thoughtful.

  • I would be happy to date a Muslim (or a holder of any other religious beliefs) provided that she did not expect me to adopt the same beliefs, and didn't mind me questioning and challenging her views, while respecting them and not expecting her to change.

    I wouldn't know what to think about you as a person until I got to know you.

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    • cool, personally I would always love such kind of discussion

      but my qs were mainly about the limitation of a muslim girlfriend. you wouldn't mind them?

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    • > even if you ever used to be married!

      Wow, I didn't know that. Thanks for sharing. Without any disrespect to the religion this is a bit hard to understand for me.

      Does Islam allow divorce?

    • the general rule is not having physical relation with stranger men(and its when they are not married), no matter if you are a virgin or not.

      yes of course. like christians have their own manner and rule for divorcing, muslim has some rules for themselves too. but of course then can obey those rules and divorce

  • Yes I would, I am catholic but Id be willing to date a muslim girl. Honestly I think I would date a girl off most religions, I just wouldn't date them if they were an atheist.

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    • and can you deal with her limitations?

      like no sexual relation before marriage ?

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    • Plus I'm completely fine with their beliefs, I have quite a few muslim freinds and never had a problem with their beliefs and them mine. I actually like the idea off a muslim girl giving herself to her husband so that can only be a good thing

    • cooll ;)

      tnx for sharing your opinion :)

  • There is no harm in Islam to have friends of opposite gender as long as you do not have any physical relations. This is my view.

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  • I absolutely would not mind, 2 years ago at my school, there was this cute Muslim girl, we looked at each other. I missed a chance to talk to her. I will always regret. are you a musiim girl in US or europe? european girls are even more open than U.S girls

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    • no I'm in US...hbu? are you from an European country?

      so you wouldn't have any problems with her limitations if you had a chance to talk to her or maybe dating?

    • Im in the U.S, but I'm from south America, but I know Europeans are more open minded. originally though, no I wouldn't if like her personality. Yea, at the moment I was a bit intimidated I gess by her cuteness, but I'm less shy now than before, so yea I would date a musilim girl

    • i see tnx for sharing your opinion :)

  • a girl is a girl regardless of where she is from and whatever religon...however, personally, I would date a Muslim girl, they are no less than any other girl..

    but I saw the comments below and your question above...you said you don't have sex with everyone!...so are there certain people that you do have sex with? basically would you have sex b4 marriage if you find a charming non muslim guy who was really good lookin and all that?

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    • no sex before marriage !

      i said everyone because personally I don't believe in sayign such words when you are getting marriage and then you can have sex, so I may have sex with my old boyfriend who probably will spend our future together, but not any sex with any boyfriend or same as some girls in first or second date!

    • ohh OK, I know what you mean, majority of girls want to have sex with every guy they fancy and when they had enough they find a nice virgin guy to settle dow with...but ye so you have had sex b4 marriage then...with your old bf...old? he's your ex for now until you feel like getting serious? what if he is having sex with other girls?

  • does not matter as long as your a good person.

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    • my q mainly was about their limitation, for example you can't have sex before marriage, you wouldn't mind these limitations?

    • i wouldn't mind it at all. there's more to a relationship than sex XD

  • Americans tend not to care what religion or beliefs people have as long as they don't try to force it on us. I'm American and I have muslim, christian, jewish, and buddhist friends and it doesn't stand in the way of our relationships.

    There are bad people everywhere though and I'm sure there are some Americans that are prejudiced against muslims. Honostly most of us don't care though.

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    • i agree with u, but I mainly meant about the serious relationships. of course for guys it would have less attraction, becoz not every physical approaching is welcomed by us. so what you think about it?

    • it wouldn't bother me.. I'd rather get to know a girl before anything physical anyway but that's just me not all american men are the same.

    • of course, anyone would be different and its wrong tending to generalize them.

      tnx for sharing me your opinion though :)

  • I would probably rather a Muslim girl that the screwed up American girls.

    At least a Muslim girl would have some sort of respect.

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    • my q mainly was about their limitation, for example you can't have sex before marriage, you wouldn't mind these limitations?

  • sure as long as she didn't expect me to go worship(full disclosure I do not believe in any of the organized religions)

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    • my q was about a relationship expectations. so if she doesn't ask you to worship, you wouldn't mind about her sexual relation limitation?

    • i'm all for different experiences...so yeah.

  • hmm we'd be cool either way, dating though sure why not as long as I didn't feel threatened by your family, I mean no one likes feeling threatened (im christian so there might be tension there)

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    • we judge people by their personalities and action not by their religious. and personally, I think believing in god is the main point, no matter what religious you have.

      but my q was about dating with a muslim girl. it would be different and maybe less pleasure due to the limitations. so you wouldn't have problem with it?

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    • haha, oh by the way I really just don't wanna date =P I prefer hangin wiht my friends (just cuz)

    • its cool, its what I prefer too ;) :D

  • Nope, no religion for me because I would date someone where we have no religious beliefs so we have more chemistry

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  • Yea... Of course. However, not now am with another sister that I know for over 21 years practical 8 months now. Since I convented my self. Before you think I did it to date her, I didn't I did or for my self. I chaqer her off garnd that day as well.

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  • If she is good looking, has Good Hygein "uses deoderant" I'm good with her being what ever she is...

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    • lol, I was not asking about their stereotypes

      i was talking about if you can deal with limitations, like no sex before marriage, are you fine with such kind of limitations?

    • I think I'd have to have some sex :P if not full sex some play would be a must

    • lol, I see

      tnx for sharing your opinion ;)

  • Well, I could spew off many reasons that would be deemed "ignorant" and possibly racist but I'll spare everyone my babbling rant...

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    • its not about others. I just asked this q to know different ideas and opinions. so if you like I would be happy to know urs too

  • It would not bother me at all so long as my lack of belief in any faith did not bother you.

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    • lool :D

      actually my q was more about expectation of a date than religious topic. like if you are dating with a muslim girl, she would be ready for everything as western girls.

    • well I generally think people that call themselves religious see their faith as an insurance policy and live how they want to for the most part. So if I took a muslim girl on a date, I'd expect her to be no different than any other girl.

  • i would date a muslim girl,i love all kind of girls

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    • lool

      and their limitations would bother u?

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    • thats cool

      tnx for sharing your opinion :)

    • is no problem you should add me as your friend

  • Nope.

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    • may I know your reasons ?

  • I wouldn't date a muslim. Or a christian.

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  • hell no for multiple reasons

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    • may I know some of them?!

    • difference of views, interests (I can tell), and my parents

    • i see...tnx for sharing your opinion ;)

  • The other thing (wanted to add, no space below) is don't push yourself into searching too hard. When it's the right time, you'll just find your type! Better to wait than feel guilty for "doing something which is not you".

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    • yes.. tnx for your advice...im not going to change myself because I can't be anyone else...i just hope to be that lucky to find the one I want and I believe in god that everything will happen in the best possible way for me :)

      by the way, tnx for sharing your opinion here :)

    • Inshallah!

  • NO!

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  • I did some study on this.

    A person's view on religious person is largely affected by the media; In this case, a Muslim community is depicted as being extremely strict with many rules. As the world becomes more liberal year by year, this restrains from a religion can cause massive stress on a person. For example, fasting, attending the mosque, and female loyalty are a definite "must" in a conventional Muslim community. From an American point of view, this just isn't convenient for them. The divorce rate in America is just over 50% now, and adultery is definitely an ongoing thing. However, in a very strict Muslim culture, a woman who commits adultery will receive severe punishment, such as being stoned to death. This is considered cruel to the rest of the world.

    Unfortunately, the news conveys many of these things. The conflict between Palestine and Lebanon definitely had a large impact on the world. This is much like the Christian Crusade back in the 1500s, and it is in fact an unnecessary act of violence. Religion is meant to create peace, not war. Also, the news on women committing adultery and being stoned is often on the news.

    While Christian god are mocked in American medias (shows such as South Park and Family Guy) with little attention, the Islamic "Allah" may not be criticized at all. This is another restrain

    From these medias, we consider Muslim as being too strict, and hence, a guy feels uncomfortable being with a Muslim girl, no matter how attracted they maybe.

    Religion is definitely a factor one must consider very carefully in a relationship. If one cannot believe in the other religion, there will definitely be a conflict sooner or later. No matter how well of a person you may be, being a Muslim is definitely not a attraction towards a more liberal mind.

    I personally cannot date neither an extreme Christian, nor a Muslim. And if I had to choose, I'd still go with a Christian family, as they have the tendency of being more liberal too.

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    • I agree with what you said about the media affecting people's judgements totally. But what about you? Even after knowing that the media can change a person's perspective you've still labeled most muslims as being "too strict". The thing is, when judging another culture or religion you have to shove aside you're own religion or culture because judging it according to what your culture thinks is good would make you an ethnocentric. You can't judge based in relation to your own.

  • A muslim girl is only supposed to go on a date with her husband,so don't call yourself muslim if you want to go on a date with someone else.Why call yourself a muslim if you don't respect and obey the obligations put upon you by the religion?why not just just throw off that "muslim" label and then be what you really want to be?

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    • the problems started when people started watching the other one's beliefs from the surface

      a muslim girl can go on date and meet different kind of people but yet keep her decency...

      so maybe before I take off the " muslim" label of myself, other people need to learn how not to judge others by their surface, because its just God who can decides if a person is "taslim" to god or not !

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    • ive read it, it was a good one;) tnx for sharing it.

      it was OK ;)

    • I like to see a bit of civility in comments on here like this. The guy, Freeway, sure has tried his best to insult the crap out of me in this thread. It is a real shame, because I am very much interested in this topic.

What Girls Said 1

  • I have a question about your culture. I've seen you post that women are not allowed to have sexual relations with a man outside of marriage. But does this rule apply for men too? Are men not allowed to have sexual relations with a woman outside of marriage?

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    • I think you mean religion not culture :P And yes the rule completely applies to the men too. You can interact with the opposite sex before marriage but as long as there is no sexual intimacy or anything that would lead to sexual intimacy. The reason being (in my opinion) so that it doesn't cause conflict when the guy or girl does get married and they've had sexual relations in the past.

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