According to him it was a fling. How can that be?

I am feeling very disrespected, like he didn't appreciate me at all... but he said he loved me and I thought he did. I just don't get why a guy would change his mind like that. Any ideas?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • First and foremost. The fact that your confused and sad about this shows that you care, a lot and usually the people who care are good people. Someone who didn't would just leave it and find someone else just like that but that doesn't sound like you.

    You've probably already tried to ask him why but if you haven't I'd start there. Assuming that you haven't, I'll only speak for myself. The times I've broken up with a girl has usually been because I wasn't having my needs met. I don't think I ask for anything unreasonable, its mostly like a kiss goodbye, a text message before she goes to bed saying goodnight, giving me the time of day to talk or hangout, and most importantly saying or doing things that would tell me that she likes me and that she wants to be in a relationship (not what you thought it would be?).

    But my point of all this is that I like it when my girls SHOW me that they care by doing these things. That is usually the deciding factor of it all because my philosophy is that people can say anything. You can say your going to shoot a fireball out of your arm, but will you do it? The same thing applies to relationships.

    I know this is probably not what you wanted to hear. I hope it all goes well for you and if it doesn't just remember that EVERYONE goes through this, guy or girl, and they usually come out of it stronger then when they came in. Good luck.

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    • I agree with you, but he knows how much he means to me, and he still broke up with me, thinking that I didn't want it. I mean, the guy has to take some responsibility and be like the girl wasn't enough for him. I showed him everything I could, but it wasn't enough for him. :( I am just sad because I feel like I will never be enough for any guy, that when something hard comes along, guys just run away.

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    • No matter what rejection will always hurt it gets even the best of us. In time it'll fade though.

    • I appreciate your help, but I have a very hard time believing that. I would rather wait and see until something better comes along, than assume that will happen since I am more realistic than optimistic.

What Guys Said 1

  • Hard to answer where there is no backstory/details...

    Sounds like he was looking for some short-term fun or just decided that you weren't the right girl for him.

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What Girls Said 2

  • he used you. it happens. nothing you need wrong, he was just a jackass

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    • The thing is, I don't think he used me. We both loved each other. Something just happened and he was like, OK, I don't want this anymore. It just sucks, because I still wanted him.

  • If you guys rushed into sex, there's no way he thought of you as long-term material. Live and learn.

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