my boyfriend and I have been together almost a year and 4 months now and I just recently found out that he doesn't like to talk to me about things going on in his head or tell me how he feels because of all we will do is fight about it. so he has been keeping things from me for a while now. he doubts that we will be able to get along and he hates that I don't like him going out on his own with friends to places that has alcohol and idiots ( he used to drink and party all the time) and there are things that I don't like hearing, so he won't tell me anything. but I tell him all the time things he doesn't wanna know. I'm completely honest with him. I tell him how I feel even if its not immediately after I feel it, and I don't go places with friends because I already know that he won't be comfortable with it, such as hanging out with guys, hanging out with my best freind and her husband, or going to passion parties with my friend. I respect him enough to not do things for him, and all I do is that he do the same with me. all he wants to do is go to the fair with his friend and see his friends when he is working late night and is behind in his college class. all I do is suggest that he do things differently and he doesnt, but then complains when I'm disappointed in him all the time and wonders why we fight all the time. so why didn't he just talk about thins to me. me and him have worked out all the bad things that have come into my life that affects him. why can't he come to me about everything. he goes to his friends before he will even think about coming to me. I try to go to him first about everything. sometimes I can't because he is working or I am at school. after a year and 4 months, I don't understand why he has never came to me about anything and why he just now chose to tell me that he chooses not to tell me things. that he doubts things between us. that I'm too strict on him. that he won't tell me things just because its a touchy subject. he says he loves me, but I'm starting to think that he doesnt. please help.
Why didn't he tell me about it before?
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What Girls Said 2
Guys usually think they are sparing the girls feelings by hiding things, when in the end it hurts more knowing they hid stuff.
When you confront them about knowing something they blame you for not being "understanding"
Be a bit more open to him. If he tells you something and you hate it, try and look at it from his point of view. Somethings may hurt you but understand them.
Make an opportunity for him to tell you something. Be like "hmm is that girl pretty? I think she has really nice eyes"
See if he agrees, then he'll realize he can have a friendship and relationship in one0
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