Guy is more 'comfortable kissing than hugging..? what can I do? (without him assuming I'm clingy)

so.. he kissed me a few days ago, really passionately, so we've been kissing ever since, but he never hugs me, or really touches me unless were kissing. I don't feel comfortable hugging him, because I'm used to not touching people. if he hadn't kissed me, id understand it better, then we would just be two people who were not comfortable touching each other -yet. he acts like me, as far as not being comfortable touching, (tense nervous uncomfortable uncertain awkward reserved) except he kisses really intensely. how can he feel comfortable kissing me, if he can't feel comfortable hugging me? its also weird because before we were dating he would do things like grab my hand or rub my shoulders & id do similar things freely... we didn't touch a lot but more than now.

(& I also don't want to just go touching him & come off as clingy. Girls don't have to do much at all, for guys to jump to that conclusion.. So its just easier if he does it first. But if I ask him to, or ask him why he doesn't, that's the same thing as me doing it, and he will still think I'm clingy... What can I do?)


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What Guys Said 1

  • Unfortunantly, I don't think anyone here can tell you why he's like that so you're just going to have to talk to him about it. Always remember communication is really important in any relationship.

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    • if something is wrong I don't want to make it worse. I'm wondering if I should just see if he talks about it or, idk, its not normal tho right?

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    • basically if I touch him at all, tap on his shoulder , head, foot, when were not kissing he reacts really viscerally , in a negative way. sometimes scared sometimes mad but he won't talk about it.

      I can understand being uncomfortable touching. I am with most people not him tho. BUT I don't understand how he can kiss, and touch then.. he still randomly ha to stop or wants to just talk, but he can do it, how is making out easier than casual touching?

    • I mean I feel like the only thing you can do is talk to him about it. Always remember communication is a huge part of any relationship. He might have had something happen to him in his past that makes him like that and there is no way you could even know about unless he tells you.

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