How can you be 'that one guy' when the girl you like hangs out with guys generally?

I don't see this girl very often but when we do see each other we get along very well. We traded numbers a while back (she made me, haha) and she came to a party with me and some friends a while back, but beyond that not a whole lot has gone on between us. We've both been busy with work/class and finally summer break hit... and she went home.

Every time I've seen her we've been flirty, but I get the feeling she's like that to her friends as well. On the plus side the one party we went to together she hung around me most of the night and we ended up hugging for a good portion of it. On the downside I don't think either of us wanted to do anything more than that even drunk because my ex was sitting right there (and I still hadn't been COMPLETELY over her at the time) and a few of her friends were there too.

We talk on Facebook every now and then, and when I saw that sh*t was going down for her at home during one of my overnight shifts (at like 4am) I texted her reminding her she has a lot of friends who know she's awesome and she's welcome to come visit whenever. She texted me back almost instantly thanking me and admitting she was so glad I'd told her that. She was planning to come into the city for jury duty anyway but she's probably going to have to couch surf, and asked to stay at my place for a few days too, and that she'd explain what was going on when she visited.

I told her sure obviously. Except this will be the first time we've hung out on a 1-on-1 basis for longer than a 2 block walk. She's going through a rough time it seems like and I don't want to take advantage of that, but at the same time I don't want to commit myself to being 'just a friend'. What can I do?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • You've done great so fa. Let her get to know you better during these days... Show her you are Boyfriend material, not just friend. Be courteous, sweet and attentive if that's what you really are, just show her you've got it in you... is good that you don't want to take adventage of her, but so far you haven't. If you perceive that she is too vulnerable during these days, don't come too strong and be careful if she tries to initiate something out of dispair or sorrow, or you'll end up in the friends w/benefits trunk... good luck! let us know what happened...

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What Girls Said 2

  • no I think that was super duper sweet and you guys seem like you could really be something

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  • I think you're on the right track. I don't think you're necessarily taking advantage of her so you shouldn't feel like you are.

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What Guys Said 1

  • good job so far. it sounds like this is your opportunity to make a positive impression on her. just keep doing what you're doing. the extra time around you for a few days will surely make her like you more... she'll see just how awesome you are. keep it up :)

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