How much does faith/religion matter, ladies?

I'm a Catholic and I'm very active in my faith. I am a Knight of Columbus, I work food drives, soup kitchens, fund raisers, pregnancy centers, help around the churches, you get the idea. My question to you ladies is, how important is faith and/or religion to you in a relationship? Is it important enough you would only date someone of the same faith, or would it be enough just to know your partner has a faith life? Or is it not an issue at all? Any insights would be appreciated :)


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Most Helpful Girl

  • I am passionately in love with God; he is always there for me, listening to my prayers and carrying me when I need help. God comes first in my life and so anyone I consider being in a relationship with needs to be pursuing God. I have to be able to talk to my partner about my faith, especially in the times when I am struggling or have questions, I need a partner who can give me the support and encouragement I need to keep chasing after God. I was once told that you should be running toward God with everything you have (your talents, your time, your actions, etc) and if at one point you look beside you and see someone running with the same passion and intensity then they may be considered for a relationship..that is advice I live by.

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What Girls Said 14

  • The only reason it might possibly be an issue for me is if they weren't respectful of my LACK of faith/religion, if they condescended to me about it or tried to convert me [conversations and discussions are fine, I love studying and talking religion, but no proselytizing, or you will not have a happy girl on your hands], or just otherwise insinuating the 'wrongness' of my viewpoint. I'd feel disrespected, because you shouldn't be in a relationship with me if you don't want me for everything I already am. If you want me for what I COULD be, or how I could change, you're not someone I want to be with. You know?

    My boyfriend is a Christian, or at least has very Christian beliefs, while my beliefs are very agnostic but spiritual and nature-based. It hasn't ever been a problem for us because we respect each other enough to question ourselves and learn from each other, to grow together despite our differences.

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  • I'm Catholic and I've dated a Muslim before. He's an amazing person. However, I already knew from the beginning that it wouldn't go far because of this. When it comes to marriage, it has to be to a catholic man. However, while I appreciate the fact that I would be able to communicate my ideas and beliefs with you, from the stuff you've listed down as your achievements, I'd be worried that you could be a "holier than thou" kinda boyfriend. No offence. Again, that's just me, yknow...someone else would probably think otherwise

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  • It's important enough that I think we have to have, at least, similar faiths. I'm Catholic, and I want my children to believe in God and Jesus. I don't know if I could date a Jew or Hindu. I also want to be married in a Church. At the same time, if I fall in love, I fall in love, and God can't hate that, no matter what.

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  • It matters a lot to me because I don't think I could date someone who was religious.

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  • I am religious myself, although not as active as you, but I would appriciate if guy was religous too to some extent. Obviously if it takes too much time, its not good but in general its I'd say it's plus.

    Overall it's not really important but its a plus

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  • I'm agnostic/atheist but I really don't like religion, but I respect my religious friends. I wouldn't want my boyfriend to be very active, but if he just believes in God or is like whatever, then its ok.

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    • Why is someone thumbing down people's comment if they say they're not religious? It's weird because you guys say God loves everyone regardless what they believe in.

  • as long as they didn't belittle my faith I'd be okay with it.

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  • I would prefer them to be an atheist, but still do volunteer work as I do it myself.

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  • I'm not at all religious and I couldn't date a religious person. Our beliefs would be too conflicting. I'd much rather he fall in love with someone who shares the same beliefs as him.

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  • It's not an issue at all provided he doesn't try to change/condemn my own beliefs.

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  • I'm not religious so I wouldn't want to date a guy who was very active in religion

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  • I think it matters a lot for a lot of people, and definitely for me, personally. I love the idea that two people can come together regardless of beliefs and just love each other, but, aside from the technical complications, there are the clashings of opinions and morals and whether or not you can stand to be with a certain type of person. I think maybe the latter can be pushed aside temporarily while dating for some people (not necessarily me though lol) but marriage and/or starting a family will often make one person yield in some way. some people are totally okay with that, but I definitely wouldn't be. My beliefs are my beliefs and I couldn't really be comfortable with someone raising my kids to believe in something while I'm telling them I don't believe in it. Educate them about all things, of course, but that's very different.

    Technical complications could be little things that always pop up...in some religions, the families don't allow the couple to go on dates alone, some religions practice the whole arranged marriage, some religions worship on different days than others (complicated weekends lol), some religions are homophobic, clothing differences, premarital sex, etc.

    I definitly think SOME people just want respect and that's it, but I notice so many differences in mentality in many people of some religions (obviously individuals vary, but general beliefs, I mean) as well as political views that may be tied into their faith, that conflict with my beliefs and the things I support, and how I just live my life. even everyday passing comments that I make may offend offend them, etc. I just prefer someone who is also atheist like I am, or at least agnostic. Things are much better when you're on the same page. And I'm much more likely (at least my experience has proven so) to find someone who agrees with and is comfortable with my extremely liberal political beliefs, me being a feminist, being pro-choice, my bisexuality, being very open to things that many religious people may not be comfortable with, etc. I'm very vocal and passionate about my disdain for religion and my view that god is an illusion, simply a creation of man, and, on the flip side now, I just couldn't really see too many religious people sticking it out for long either. things would clash.

    I went to christian schools my entire life before university and although I did date a couple great atheists, I dated several christians in middle school and high school. it was always interesting when they found out I was atheist. like they just couldn't believe it. I got asked out a lot in school and I would have sworn up and down that it was because I was hot sh*t (partially true) but I think after 10th grade it was because some just wanted to be the ones to save me lol that was the year I was just fed up with the the b.s. and ripped up my bible and tossed it in the trash in front of my class.

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  • i am actually bhuddist and liked this jewish guy and I didn't care about our faiths at all I did my own thing he did his own thing I liked him a lot and wanted a future with him but he couldn't marry me so he ended it =/ he could only marry a jewish woman it sucked

    the only religions that in my personal opinion and honestly I couldn't deal with or don't want to deal with rather, would be scientology and islam =S they just don't float in my boat, every other religion seems cool though I don't have a problem with

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  • we aren't all the same personally it is important for my partner has a religion because it means he is faithful, I don't expect him to be a saint and go to church everyday but it would be nice if he can say at least a prayer with me.. so, to me its important for him have a religion ay least .

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What Guys Said 3

  • I would hope that it's VERY low on the importance scale since I'm an Atheist, haha.

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  • Lol why should they let a third person get in the middle of their relationship?

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  • It seems that atheists on this site are a lot more picky about these things than others.

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