Why do people text??

Maybe I'm old school, but I hate texting. I see it as being ultra impersonal. One time somebody kept texting me and I picked up the phone to call her. She talked for only a few minutes, said goodbye, and then started texting me again. What's up with that? It seems the art of communication is now limited to a tiny screen on my phone; it separates a person from confidence and accountability. Want to talk? Just dial my number. Anybody have any thoughts on this?


Most Helpful Guy

  • Because people are lame. I don't text. It's bad for society.

    • It is! The only words they know are lol, rofl, bamf, wtf, etc.

    • Look at the answers, I'm afraid of communicating in real time because I might not know the answer to something. I just say 'I'm not sure, I'll have to get back to you'.

      Basically you have a generation of people who are afraid to commit to a CONVERSATION. It's beyond weak.


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What Girls Said 8

  • Texting is a super impersonal form of communication that cuts out any possible anxiety a person would have in calling. I think texting works in 2 cases 1) When you have an established relationship, friendship or with family and you have a quick factual question or statement to make, like "I am at the restaurant, where are you?". 2) When you want to talk to someone in a place where either of you cannot talk on the phone. Usually this should be kept to a minimum but in my case, my fiance has a schedule that makes it hard to see each other and we like to send little texts during the day.

    Texting has definitely introduced a lot of confusion into the dating world. People actually take texts as being a much more serious indication of someone's interest than it is. A lot of people say things by text that they would never say in person or on a call and in many cases it is not cool, like random sexting from someone you are not in a relationship with. I had someone text-stalk me and send pics of their junk, horrible. He was a sad soul who obviously had no self-confidence, because the one and only date we went on he was sarcastic yet timid, only hugged me briefly at the end, and then after turned into this creeper.

    I have a friend who really tries to avoid the whole impersonal electronic communication thing but she does screen calls with her old school answering machine and overall comes across as a bit unresponsive and uncaring rather than someone who wants to be personal. I think it is difficult to avoid the new forms of communication without appearing aloof.

    • You bring up very good points. Personally I do not consider texting a way of showing interest. Some girls refuse to communicate with me in any other way. I'm very old school. Screw the iphone. I still write all my phone numbers and addresses by paper and pencil.

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    • Some people tell me girls like reading words more than hearing them and hence the interest in texting. I dunno. I see girls my age go nuts about texts from guys "talking" to them and I feel like I'm just screwed.

    • Now that you mention that, I notice that the thing about the written word is that you get to put your own spin on how it is being delivered. When we read a text we imagine a certain tone of voice and a certain expression on the sender's face. We tend to imagine something very nice and add a back story to it as well. It is interesting to consider how much of a story we add to a simple text.

  • I don't have long conversations with people when I text, but texting's easier when you just have something simple to say. Like, "hey, what time will you be home?", or "which theater are we going to?". I get what you mean though, my best friend and I hardly ever text, and most people find that really weird lol. I like calling, because your tone's clearer and it's just easier to express yourself. Talking through text is pretty limiting, and sometimes there are misunderstandings when people don't catch your sarcasm and things.

    Oh, and the other good thing about text is that I can text people outside the country without worrying about a huge bill.

  • Hey, I have a friend who only lets me call her. No texting. Just make the same claim. The next time you see your friends in person tell them you don't text. Cancel your texting plan if you want or limit it. At first it might seem a little isolating, but after a while your phone will be ringing off the hook.

    Also, a major benefit of texting is that you can have more then one conversation at once and it gives time to figure out how to put their thoughts into words without the awkward silences.

    And if you really want to hear someones voice- Skype!


  • texting is easier. there are no awkward moments. if you don't want to answer, you can ignore it. you control where the conversation goes, how long it lasts. some people feel more comfortable texting as opposed to calling because they aren't being 'put on the spot'. I used to feel similarly about texting, but now I use it all the time.

    • Which is why I feel it erases confidence and accountability. How can you be in a relationship and communicate on such convenient terms? It won't work. Sometimes you have to be put on the spot. Sometimes you need awkward moments. It makes us stronger.

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    • foolycooly1001- that's exactly what I mean. You can ignore a text and say you were "busy" to avoid being put on the spot. It gives someone the option of bailing out of a conversation rather than stand up and talk. It's lame in my opinion.

    • i do like iming, though. texting is a pain in the butt. I don't have a new phone with a keyboard.

  • the thing is...think about this ever done this question in real life? Asked someone something like do you want to go out with me, obviously you have but people think it´s easier when they don´t have to hear or see a reaction. It is limited ans stupid but would you rather think they didn´t have their phone at hand or hear them pause and then tell you and uhmmm "ok".

    People are scared so they use it.

  • Some people just feel more comfortable texting. For example, I only like talking to people on the phone if I know them really well. I have this friend that used to call and I would answer, but tell him to just text me instead.

    • I noticed younger engineers at work would use email instead of calling someone on the phone because they're afraid of talking on the phone. They're afraid of being asked questions they can't answer. I'd admire a woman that can break this "fear" and give me a call. I love to hear her voice, even if there are those long moments of silence.

    • I just don't like talking on phones. I think texting is a lot more convenient. It's not because it's a "fear" or anything like that.

  • because times change

  • I've always been better at expressing myself through writing. Texting offers me a chance to express myself best. I hate talking on the phone because I hate the long awkward silences when I'm trying to think of how to say what I want to say.

    trust me I am trying to work on being better at communicating verbally - it's easy if in person, but I'm still at odds on the phone. :/

    • In writing, I'll use hand written letters. Yes. I still do that. I feel it is more romantic to see someone's real handwriting. I bet I'm the only one who keeps our post office operating.

    • I write letters too, but not nearly as often as I used to though.

What Guys Said 2

  • It's the convieniance of it, you can have a convo without actually having one.

    I know what you mean, I'd rather talk if if it's something important but you've got to remember sometimes not everyone is in the mood for a chat. You must have your times where you'd rather text than talk... everyone's different

    One thing I detest about texting some people is thier use of foul, lazy, improvised English. Saying words how they sound using numbers etc rather than writing the actual word. I shorten words if I'm in a hurry sometimes but things like...

    W8n - waiting

    4gvn - Forgiven

    wlkn - walking... the list goes on, they all p*ss me off, that's ultra impersonal

    • It's actually hurting our newer generation. Their vocabulary skills are seriously lacking.

    • Their vocabulary skills are seriously lacking... I agree 100%. I've even know people to write things thinking that the text spelling is infact correct spelling. I ONCE (once and only once) had to rewrite a letter because I'd written 'cos' instead of because?!?!?!

      It's becoming normal for a lot of people

  • Sometimes you only have something quick to say and you may just not want to talk to that person