Will he call? Or did I blow it?

My ex boyfriend broke up with me three weeks ago. We got into a small fight, and he broke up with me because we are going to be in a long distance and he doesn't want to do it. I pleaded, begged, and told him I'd do anything... I also called him 30 minutes straight after he left. Then a few hours later I texted him I wanted to talk again, but he said we'd talk but he needs some time. So he said if I was really sorry then I should understand and not stalk him. I replied with a kind of long heavy text. And I told him to call me when he's ready, or I'll call him if he didn't by the end of May.

He didn't call, and I didn't contact him for three weeks. I texted him casually after three weeks, then he texted me back.

But I made a mistake... that I visited him at his bar. He didn't look happy to see me... He looked somehow awkward that I was there. He talked to me casually though, and I wasn't trying to get his attention. I mainly talked to my friends. That was first time I saw him after the breakup.

While I was at the bar, I said wanna get lunch? then he said yeah we can do that. Then I also said "I acted out of emotion." He said "yeah I know. we can talk over lunch." I said call me, and he said yes. And I said promise? (not in a demanding way) and he said yea promise. But it's been almost three days and he hasn't called...

Did I scare him by showing up at his bar? Will he call?

Updates:
p.s. I don't know how to set my age range, but I'm 20-25.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Well, you definitely didn't handle it the best way possible, but you alone aren't in the wrong. First of all, this guy never gave you closure. It doesn't sound like you guys hate each other and are at each others' throats, so he has no excuse. Second of all, I consider wasting somebody's time to be one of the rudest, most pathetic things a person can do. He said he'd call you about lunch and has made you wait half a week so far? Total. F***ing. Asshole. Sure, he doesn't owe you anything if you think about, but common decency obliges him to at least tell you he wasn't serious about the lunch or something (if he wasn't). And if he ain't go common decency, then I suggest you forget the sucker.

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What Guys Said 1

  • ive been in your sit. and long distance things don't work for me anyway. the more you try to save it, hang on to him, the further you'll push him away and you don't want that. I know its hard to accept but only way to possibly to amend things is to totally leave him alone one hundred percent...no emails, calls, texts, etc you get it. don't think I'm right...try it and you'll see.

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    • Do you think I showed him my neediness by visiting his work?

    • definitely I know your intentions are well but makes you seem desperate and stalkerish...let him be trust me

What Girls Said 2

  • aww... I felt bad after reading this! c wht you need to do is just let him be. I will tell you why. if he is not interested in getting back then no matter how much you call him, stalk him or try different ideas and tactics... it won't help. the only thing it will end up doing is to make you look more miserable and will hurt your self respect like hell.

    if he is interested in getting back... he will! you have shown enough for him to know that you are interested in getting back with him. so he knows you want him. now the ball is in his court. by not calling him, mailing him or meeting him you show that you are not clingy...u respect his decision and you have enough back bone to move on. so he will call you once he starts realizing your value!

    this works!

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  • yeah stop communicating him and give him space and time you need some TLC go on a girls night out do shopping and be happy

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