Drunk texting... what does this mean?!

There's this girl that I've been talking to a bit lately. She's not just a girl. we had a thing for each other like 2 years ago, and I blew it. I mean.she's amazing -- we had a good thing, and it was nearly exclusive. And she reallllllly liked me as well.

I ended up taking my ex girlfriend back while I was talking to this girl, and that's how I f**ked up, but whatever. that's beside the point.

Since that whole situation we have barely been friends. I've seen her like 10 times in the past 2 years. One day, a few weeks ago she randomly texted me saying she missed me and she wanted to hang out. So I invited her to my party, and we've partied together like 3 times since then (over the past few weeks). Whenever we're together we have pretty deep convos about how we felt and about how I regret my decision etc. (She has a boyfriend now btw).

The past few weekends we have had some serious text convos. they've lasted like 3 hours, but we were both drunk/tipsy during the convos. Either way, she opens up to me big time during these texting conversations. She complains about her boyfriend and tells me that I'm the only person she can trust.

Here are some examples of texts:

--"Someday soon! :):) you're the best cody. Honestly." <--after I cracked a joke about hopefully seeing her again.

--":) your so awesome." <-- after an unresponded text. Like she sent two in a row.

--"Ah.:( :( everyone has these perfect boyfriends. And mine. Acts like he's too good. He's in college. Am I that bad?"

--"I DONT know who to trust. I know I can trust you. And my parents. That's it."

--"Good. Because. You're awesome. And you're one person. that I can trust. And am willing to have beside me :) through it all."

There are plenty more like that. I mean, this is just one convo that I still have in my outbox. I usually text her the following Sunday, but she doesn't respond. I can't help but to think that she feels guilty or embarassed about the texts.

Somebody tell me what these mean and what I should do. I like her A LOT, and I have for two years.

Updates:
I told her last night that I would really like to talk to her sometime (like we used to, on the phone) - not on the weekend or drunk. because I would really like to catch up. She agreed. I told her to hit me up, and she said she would.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Yea dude. She obvious likes you, she's even sayin bad stuff about her boyfriend. She says that you and her parents are the only ones she can trust. That's huge. I think you should invite her to another party and make it clear you want her (but do you have a girlfriend right now?). if she starts talkin about her boyfriend, tell her to dump him. That text up there about her boyfriend says she ain't happy right now that she's questioning herself, and she can't even trust her own boyfriend, she trusts you over anyone, somethin she doesn't have with anyone else but you. Tell her flat out to just dump her boyfriend is what I'd say. I think she would dump him, then go for her. even if she doesn't, just go for her cause you like her ALOT.

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    • My ex-girlfriend is still pretty heavily in my life, but I'm working on fixing that. She gets very jealous about this girl that I'm talking about.

      I would like to tell her to dump him, but I also don't want to come out making her feel pressured. I would like him to keep making his mistakes, and I could continue to capitalize on those... exploit them. I also need a good time to tell her to dump him. A time where we're together, and he's upsetting her. But I would need to elaborate...

What Girls Said 9

  • sounds like she still likes and cares for you a lot and wants to know if theirs a chance between you two, but at the same time is scared of getting hurt. or be chosen 2nd. The texts are her way of reaching out and trying to make sure you are always there. she is obviously keeping her hurt and anger suppressed from you. because yes, she does and has every right to feel upset about you choosing your ex-girlfriend over her. Especially when you come back and say that you regret your decision. Obviously there had to be something that she didn't have to offer that your ex could. which makes us girls feel almost not good enough. girls can be very competitive.

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    • At the time I was first talking to this girl, I was 15. I didn't have a license yet, and she lived 30 minutes away, as opposed to my ex girlfriend who lived 2 blocks away. Not to mention the fact that me and my ex dated for a year already... we had the connection, and I had the sense of security with her. I guess that's what she had to offer.

  • Drunk texts are a definite indication that she is into you. Ask anyone who has ever send a drunk message. One's true feelings come out whilst under the influence and however much she might enjoy her current boyfriend, there is obviously something missing in her life that she wishes she could have (you), Either that, or she is just infactuated with you, as you are not her boyfriend and someone who she 'cannot' have (because she has a boyfriend). Hence, her feelings for you are easy to express whilst under the influence. If you really like this girl, then don't let her grace you with a few drunk texts per week and tell her that you want to make things official. unless you are enjoying the few drunk flirts you have a week?

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  • well this girl must be telling you her true feelings when she is drunk. because theories say that when someone is drunk they are more able to express their feelings and thoughts.so I think you guys are meant for each other! seriously.

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  • There is a saying, drunk man's words are sober man's thoughts. ;)

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  • What I think she is trying to say is that she definitely trust you and that she wants to try again to have a realationship with you.

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  • Well I think she does mean what she says in these texts and is guilty for saying these things to you you because she has a boyfriend. She needs to do what she feels is best for her and you. Its not fair to both of you if she says these things. Try talking to her about it when you are both sober.

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  • That's really good I hope that everything works out between you two.

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  • Hey that's a good start. What I would do is ask her about the texting while being drunk. Tell her that you could really make her happy. I mean obviously the guy she is seeing isn't.

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  • she could just be asking for attention that's she's lacking from her current boyfriend and she can use the excuse she was drunk to text you.or she knows you like her but she can't tell you straight to your face that she doesn't like you back like that (all her texts sound like your a great friend.not more.) I could be wrong. How does she complain about her boyfriend to you?

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    • She talks about how he doesn't appreciate her, and she shows a high level of insecurity (that should not exist). She talks about not being able to trust him at all as well... not because he has messed up yet, but because she has trust issues already and he doesn't give the best vibes.

What Guys Said 5

  • I would say mixture for the two, from what it sounds like she did really really like you and she holds that level of trust and being connected to you as the prescient of what she wants in a relationship, now seeing she is in one I suppose she’s trying to make the one she’s in raise to that level, she has a guy she might like but uses you for the emotional support. I know it feels good to be wanted again but for your sake you need to make a stand tell her if this is how she feels then she needs to make a choice. Actions speak louder then words in this case. Its not about her proving herself , it seems like that’s what you need to do, but rather she needs to be sure of her feelings. You can show how much you care fore her by taking a stand and helping her come to a decision but might I suggest meeting in person not a t a party to discuss this as friends of course. Worry about her feelings, her conflict help her and then based on what she does, take a stand for yourself.

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  • I just broke up with my wife because of inappropriately texting someone outside of the relationship! In hindsight, if you want to be with this other lady try and do it neatly. Go find her, decide if you want to make the jump, jump if you want to, cut if off if you don't! :-)

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  • Drinking only brings up what is already there. You two obviously have something for each other and she has negatives toward her bf. You just to establish this kind of contact in person not intoxicated.

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  • she obviously still has feelings for you deep down she probably always will. if you really really like her just tell her go for it.

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  • maybe stop drinking.

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