Would you date someone who is completely not what you want?

If a person really really loves you, unconditionally -- and you know it. He or she accepts you no matter what. HOWEVER, they have so, so many flaws. They don't understand you and they don't get it -- it's not that they don't want to, they just don't know how. You've tried communication to various degrees (yes -- even straight out telling the person) but they still don't understand the type of person you are and what you want and need in a relationship. They have different beliefs than you about relationships and they don't think enough about it to compromise -- they just don't understand. For example, on a birthday, they would tell you happy birthday at the end of the day and that's about it -- just because that's how they are. You are a very passionate person and you like to show and receive passion -- they probably could not even define what passion is. It's just nothing gets through to this person emotionally -- yet they still love you and care for you. Also, they are the complete opposite of everything that you ever wanted in a boyfriend or girlfriend.

Given this information, would you still give them a chance? Just because they truly, truly love you? Or you would spare the possibility of hurting the person and let them go?

(I honestly don't want to hurt them, but they won't take No for an answer and keep pushing)

  • I would give him/her a chance.
    30% (3)44% (4)37% (7)Vote
  • I wouldn't give him/her a chance.
    70% (7)56% (5)63% (12)Vote
And you are? I'm a GirlI'm a Guy
Updates:
This guy was my best friend for four years.. we did date for almost 3 years and it didn't work out. A year later now he's suddenly trying to get me back (he says he's grown up) but now I've moved on (somewhat).. I gave up and I'm scared to go back to the way things used to be. He gave me 2 options -- to be his "lover" and "sweetheart" or we have to quit talking -- he can't handle being friends. Taking people's advice and following my gut, I chose to walk away as of yesterday.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • I voted A. I wouldn't mind going out on a few dates with them, and see where it leads. Also maybe the things I think I am looking for might not be what I actually need. I know a lot of men that end up married to the exact opposite type of woman they thought they always wanted, and they couldn't be happier.

    In order to have a long term relationship with the person, we would HAVE to be able to work through our communication issues. If we can't do that after dating for a while I would call it quits.

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What Guys Said 4

  • if you mean by she is not a virgin then I would never date her but if you talking about she is a virgin I'll give her a chance and I also agree xBurningSilence and so if you want to know why I won't date non virgin girls because she have baggage and issues heck she might still have feelings for him and above all she might have all stds, hivs, aids, herpes etc. etc.and I will never be her second choice guy either she pick me first for who I am or leave out of it if he is a jerk to her because I refuse to be her back up guy aka her back up plan I mean why should us nice guys get left overs and they think we are too nice so if she is a virgin I give her a chance but if she is not a virgin I won't give her a chance plus if she have nature breast I will date her but if she have fake breasts aka breast implants I won't date her because to me breast implants are a turn off to me

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    • i say I won't date anyone with breast implants I mean why should I they always get attention from all the shallow men they look at breast all the time when she get all attention from all the shallow men and she allow them touch her breasts I mean she is whoring in front of me and she expect me to forgive her and stay with her I'm sorry but I'm not that shallow she either be proud of nature breast if not to me it sounds like she is insecure and also sounds like she have issues besides

    • she will lose me and my respect trust and love she does it I'm sorry but I'm not going to deal with cheaters and above all she lost my respect she is not a virgin because she didn't wait for the right guy, she didn't wait for the right time or she didn't save it till marriage I say I don't respect women just throw away their virginity for any guys any guys she sees or other words she open her legs for any guys she sees that's what I meant so you understand what I mean

  • No if my heart isn't in it then in the end I won't be happy no matter how much they care about me.

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    • And I don't mean that in a d*** way. In the end they would be hurt more than if I had just said no to begin with

  • If I love them and they love me, I'd see no problem. If I, however, didn't feel anything for them I wouldn't push for more just cause they love me unconditionally. That's not fair to them or me. They deserve someone who'll feel the same for them.

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  • No

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What Girls Said 4

  • no. being loved unconditionally while not being fully understood is contradictory. the whole point of unconditional love is to find someone who knows all the good stuff and bad stuff about you and loves you for it. I wouldn't want to be with someone who didn't get who I was or what I need.

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  • No. A relationship should be like a jigsaw puzzle. Sometimes the piece is hard to get to fit but in the end it will, and it creates a bigger picture. Just because a piece wants to fit doesn't mean it will and it will ruin the image in the end. You two aren't meant to be a picture if your pieces don't match up.

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  • No. Someone loving you isn't a logical or substantial reason to remain with them.

    Yes, it'll hurt them to end things - but the relationship has no potential. You have no chemistry, nor connection. It'll only hurt more in the end if you drag it out, so it's best to end things ASAP.

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  • That's how my boyfriend is. We've been together for 7 months. I may value the relationship but I also value what he tries and do.. I'm not forcing anything either.

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