Do you ever get over your first real love?

Is it the same for both men and women? How is it different?

Say you break up with your first true love, your young. 18 and 19. You had an amazing relationship for the most part but in the end one of you just decided that it was for the best to break up. Do either of them really ever get over it? Is there a chance of getting back together at some point?


Most Helpful Girl

  • I don't really think anyone truly gets over their first true love, they always seem to be in the back of your mind, residual feelings seem to linger. You might be in another wonderful relationship, you might be focusing on your career or you might be travelling the world or who knows what else... but there are days when they will cross your mind, maybe just randomly or because something reminded you of them, and you will remember the good and bad times you've shared, their face, words they said, things they loved, the way they looked at you... and you will think 'what if...' 'where are they now?' and maybe even 'if only...'

    With other loves, people will usually look back and be glad or relieved that relationship is over, even if it was a good one, but they never haunt you as your first love does.

    Can you get back together one day? I've heard a number of stories about it happening through a combination of chance and different circumstances. Perhaps some people will say it's fate and that it is meant to be if that happens. You never know what's coming for you in life afterall... so who knows.

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What Guys Said 3

  • I can only talk from my own experience; when I was 8 I lost my mom so by the time I was a young man in my early teens I was already 5'11" blond hair and blue eyes and dimples and more than ready for a woman in my life. By the time my sixteenth birthday rolled around I was in love with one of those sexy-crazy redheads that just happened to be a deacon's daughter. Well she had me wrapped around her little finger and pretty soon I was madly in love and she was being pushed by her crazy friends to go live the wild life so she broke up; and I still think about her, I did earlier today. But I see it now as a lesson that taught me to wake up and demand more from my partners because it's my own heart that will suffer in the end if I don't. Today I use GOD's Check list to see if they even qualify to date me, because I'm 100% loyal that's worth a lot, I don't have diseases because I don't mess around like that, and the list goes on. Most importantly is she has to LOVE AND RESPECT GOD as much as I do, and she has to be willing to love me the way my first love never did ! *PS. She realized what she lost and tried to get me back, but I wasn't foolish enough to take her back because by that time I was mature enough to see right through her and wasn't falling for her games.

  • there's a chance of getting back together, but only you know if that's best in your life.

    everyone defines "getting over someone" differently: when you don't expect they'll want to get back with you, or when you're able to commit to a new relationship, or when you're no longer angry (if it was a bad breakup) or sad.

    your first love's always different, though, and you'll always remember them in a different way than other relationships.

  • First real love is remembered forever.

    It doesn't matter are you girl or a boy.


What Girls Said 9

  • It takes time, but eventually you get to a point where you don't miss that person anymore and it's w/e you can fully love someone else.

    However, if you guys had a mutual break up, there may be residual feelings and you two could hook up again. I think it's important to make the decision clear though. People often end up being victims of rebound because of individuals who aren't over their first love or previous relationship, and in that latter regard, I would deem that unfair :*)

  • Yeah, I got over my first, second and third love eventually. :-) I think it's easier once you know it is really over.

  • You do get over it. It takes lots of time & tears but you'll eventually get over it, there's always that special someone who comes along life to heel your brokenheart time. No matter how it endedd you'll think of your firts love now and then.

  • Well, I guess everyone is different, but I never really got over my first love. Here's my story:

    Freshmen year in high school this guy asked me out and I didn't want to date him, so my friend made up a lie and told him I had a boyfriend (I know bad), Well I felt guilty about it and so the following monday I told him I didn't have a boyfriend, so we started dating (giving him a chance). Then we dated for 5 months, I fell in love with him. Then I broke up with him because of something that happened. But I still had feelings for him. I dated someone else and we broke up, then I went back to him and we broke up again. So I dated other people and then this past school year (end of junior year) I saw him and he called me that day and we started talking and now I'm in my senior year and me and him have been dating for over six months and look at my status- engaged. I went through all that trouble just to end up back to my first love. And its great.

    Hope this helps some!

  • I think that noone ever truly gets over their first real love. I was only with my first love for 6 months, but I fell hard. But it became to the point where too many people got involved and I didn't know who to believe so we ended it. Weve been on and off friends since than and every now and than I still miss him. He still occasionally tells me how ill always be his first love and he'll always be there for me, but I think that's what messes with my mind more than anything. I've been with my current boyfriend for almost 2 years, & still don't understand why my ex is on my mind every now and than. I feel like you never completely forget them, but you can move on and realize it's for the better in the end.

    • Its not for the better cause every relationship is the same.

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