Would you date someone your parents don't approve of?

Would you continue to date someone or enter into a relationship with someone your parents disapprove of?

For instance, I have a friend and her parents are racist. I don't mean they just have preferences in regards to race. No, they're racist, like, their theory is "if you aren't white, you aren't right." Well, my friend doesn't like white guys and she continues to date black and Hispanic guys, even though her parents have told her they will disown her if she continues to.

Would you?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • My parents had to get used to that from an early age when it comes to me. My parents , especially my mother knew I was mainly attracted to people outside of my race, I don't know why, just was. So my mother always tried to get me to talk to girls who were my race , but I just usually befriended them or something else, but never dated them. I wouldn't bring a girl into my heart that I couldn't introduce to my friends or family. Unfortunetly I have had girlfriends in the past when I met their parents that gave me that look in the eyes as if they would love to kick my ass or something. I'm always respectful and have manners, that's how I was raised, so I'm assuming its because I'm black, What can you do about it? Nothing, just try to change their views overtime by them trusting me with their daughter. Oh well, maybe I just have bad luck or I carry a presence that makes people feel uncomfortable.

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What Guys Said 12

  • I'm not close to my parents, so yes I would. If I were close to my parents, yes I still would date whoever I wanted. If they didn't approve of someone I wanted to date, I would still date them.

    I am my own person, and I will do as I please in my life.

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  • My parents don't care who I date as long as she's pretty. However, my sister would catch Hell for dating anyone that isn't white. While I do care what they think, provided it isn't dumb like the above stated criteria, I won't let them tell me who I will and won't date. They don't really have any authority over me since I'm out of the house.

    In her situation, it depends on how much she relies on her parents. It would be very bad if she was disowned and the relationship didn't work out. I know her parent's reasoning is flawed, but she'll be up a creek if she's disowned and the relationship fails.

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  • My parents don't really seem to care about who I date, and I'm old enough to be independent anyways. My dad is pretty racist and opinionated, and he can be a prick about it too, but even he didn't say anything bad about my relationship when I was dating a black girl...other than some racial jokes.

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  • Right now, no, as I technically still rely on them, so what they say goes.

    Later on in life, it would depend on the reasoning. If they feel I deserve better, and somehow show me that she's no good, I would probably break it off. If it's because she doesn't coincide with their preferences or something like that, I would tell them where they could shove it.

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  • I have a rule it is "None of anybody's f***in business".

    and yes I've done that many times before -they are not racist however they were so picky thinking that I am an angel and so deserve the best, you know parents mentality- until they learned to just wish me luck and never interfere with my decisions only with advice!

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  • Yes, I have 1 parent and she doesn't exactly have good taste in the opposite gender. So if she did/didn't approve of the person I am with, it wouldn't matter to me. Most likely it'd be better if she didn't approve

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  • yes, I date who I want.

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  • Hmmm my parents respect my judgment.. they don't care about race, religion, or ethnicity either..

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  • I dated a girl seriously for a few years. She was Hispanic and I'm white, my parents aren't outright races but theyre pretty close and definitely didn't approve. Screw them, I don't regret a minute I spent with her.

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  • Why would I give a f*** what my parents think? LOl

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  • I would and f*** their opinion on who I should date.

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  • My parents seem to have really, really good judgement. I'd definitely reevaluate the situation.

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What Girls Said 20

  • Yes, but luckily I've never had that issue. My mom just generally doesn't like anyone, and we don't get along, so I don't care much for her opinion on anything in my life, lol. I care about my dad's opinion, and would feel best if I had his blessing. He generally is okay with anyone as long as they treat me well and I'm happy. It helps if they have similar humor though, which luckily they do, haha. I would still date him though even if my dad wasn't so fond of him. Because I tend not to make decisions about my life based on the opinions of others. Waste of time and energy, lol.

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  • If I really loved the guy, yeah, I probably would. But I think it'd be difficult to find a guy that my parents would disapprove of in the first place, barring a druggie or a criminal. And I wouldn't date a druggie or a criminal anyway, so. Shrug.

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  • I'm not allowed to date at all and my parents expect me to just meet a guy that they approve of and get married to him after the first date. I think that is crazy and I still date in secret anyway. They would probably be really angry if they found out but I think they would disown me only if I was pregnant or had some kind of STD. They are really racist though, like they woun't let me marry anyone who is not Russian or Ukrainian. Oh well, not like I'm going to be listening to that crap anyways. I'm moving out in a year. :)

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  • Yes, my parents don't get to decide who I love---I do.

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  • In the regards you are talking about. Yes, I would date a black/Hispanic guy if he treated me good and was loyal to me. I have a very diverse family, so I can't really understand what she is going through. My mother always told me to be with a guy who I trusted and treated me well. If my mom didn't approve of him it would NEVER be because of race it would be because he is a jerk. For that reason (him being a jerk), if my parents didn't approve I would not date him for that reason, not because of race.

    I'm sorry she is in that situation it must be pretty sh*tty.

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  • Short answer: yes.

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  • Yes , I date whoever I want regardless of what my parents think. It's my own life and I have to make my own decisions.

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  • Race is not a reason to disapprove of, so I would date. If they had another reasons that not race, I would think about it and then I would decide if I date him or not.

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  • Yes, if I really liked them, if they make you happy. Why should you not be with them? Its your life and you only get to live it once

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  • in regards to race, I would date out of my parents preference or approval zone just because racism is ignorant. I'd probably do it purposely too, however if my parents genuinely dislike my boyfriend with reason I'd leave them in an instant. I can't date someone knowing that bringing them home would be uncomfortable for everyone.

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    • "I can't date someone knowing that bringing them home would be uncomfortable for everyone."

      But you just said that you would purposely pick out a dude from another race just to p*ss them off if they were racist. How does that not go against what you said about not making them uncomfortable?

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    • my wording is terrible

    • Okay, and I understand your point ...but then how do you think it would make your boyfriend feel if you dated him just to p*ss off your parents? (assuming that he actually likes you and not just trying to hump)

  • I am and I will continue to do what makes me happy.

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  • I have, and I would again. Your parents are supposed to have your best interest in mind, but you are the only one that knows what you want/what's really right for you.

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  • Honestly, I care about my parents , but I do things for myself, and if I make a mistake, its a learning lesson. My parents do have somewhat of say for the fact that I listen to their perspective but I do what makes me happy : )

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  • yes. I would.

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  • I would continue to date them, not in defiance of my parents or anything. I mean, if we were in love, who are they to judge? I would still be reluctant to bring him home though.

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  • date? yes

    marry? no :-\

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  • I would. I mean, I am the one who would be dating him, not my parents.

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  • I married someone my parents didn't approve of! My husband was sort of a "bad boy" - he's never been to jail but has had a few run-ins with the police in the past. When I met him we were both 21 and in college. They thought that he wasn't good enough for me and they were never very accepting of him. It had nothing to do with race; we are both white and my parents aren't racist anyways. We've been married for almost 5 years now and my parents have finally come around.

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  • Hell yeah.. If I get in trouble its none of my moms business she chooses the people she dates and I choose the people I date..

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  • It depends but yes!

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