Conversation over texting with my boyfriend...What exactly is going through his head?

I stayed the night at my boyfriend's house last night, and this morning I woke up and this is how it started.

Him-"U took the damn cigs and weed what is your problem"

Me-"Okay mister you told me it was OK because you didn't know if you wanted to see me tonight or not. Do you not remember that? I wasn't trying to be a bitch b...that's why I asked first."

Him-"No I don't, I was sleeping a**hole"

Me-"I'm sorry, are you honestly mad?"

Him-"Yeah I am, I tried saying I love you and sh*t and you barely talked to me this morning"

Me-"Babe seriously I was kissing on you all morning"

Him-"k"

Me-"Don't be pissed at me, are we not hanging out today?"

Him-"Idc"

Me-"Do you WANT to?"

Him-"Idc"

Me-"Really don't care at all?"

Him-"I do."

Me-"So why can't you give me an honest answer? Id rather spend Saturday with you"

Him-"idk idc"

Me-"I'm your f***ing girlfriend"

Him-"Yeah"

Me-"I'm not doing this"

Him-"Ok then do something about it"

Me-"k"

Him-"God!"

Me-"What"

Him-"U"

Me-"Ok?"

__________________________

How do I take this? What is he thinking right now?


0|0
8|12

Most Helpful Guy

  • Not sure I understand the question title in relation to the situation. This was all done over text? Even though you woke up in the same house? Or was he gone by the time you woke up?

    It's not a totally irrelevant confusion either since I wonder if he talks like this in person or just by texts. People have different personas when changing their medium of communication.

    Anyways, given that your response to his "i tried saying I love you" thing was "i was kissing on you all morning" and not something that directly addresses his concern, I'd say that's why he is angry. People (im avoiding saying 'guys' because girls are guilty of this transference too) have a tendency to use mundane issues to initiate discussion concerning more serious matters. In this case - his confessing of loving you, whatever that might mean.

    Keep in mind you didn't address his most significant comment at all throughout this excerpt. I'm not saying he's an angel by any means - immaturity is no excuse for rudeness and douchebaggery. Re think how your night went and consider what you may have said, or not said, that could have led to this problem.

    0|0
    0|0

What Guys Said 11

  • Are you dating a 10-year old boy? No offense to you, but that's seriously what he's acting like. No one who truly cares about their partner would talk to them like that or act like that. He seems like he has some maturity issues and doesn't give a flip about you. And if this is a semi-normal pattern, I'd think about looking elsewhere.

    3|3
    0|0
    • It is more normal than you could ever imagine. He actually is younger than me. But only by a year and a half. And I'm 20.

    • That's the problem with guys that age (not all, because I wasn't one of those...just the way I was raised). They can't communicate worth crap and think the way to resolve anything is to lash out and be hurtful or avoidant. Like I said, it sounds like he needs to get his life together. Whether or not you want to be a part of that is completely up to you and if it's worth dealing with this on a regular basis.

  • He's being a jerk because you pulled a move on him that got him ticked off. The weed and the cigs. You don't want to steal stuff from your boyfriend, whether it's intentional or not.

    Then he got mad over the fact that he held back his feelings because you weren't receptive.

    Ordering him NOT to be pissed off at you? HAHA. OK! So you want him to act FAKE by being happy that last night didn't go better than it could have?

    S-I-G-H. But the exchange gave me a laugh.

    0|0
    0|0
    • It was my stuff...I guess I should have mentioned that lol. I wouldn't take his things with me just for the hell of it lol. I thought that I wasn't coming back that night after work so I took my cigs and stuff with me considering I wouldn't be back to get it

  • He sounds very immature and out of his depth, I think you need an older or more mature man and he needs to grow up, because he really is not ready for a girlfriend yet, seriously, x

    1|1
    1|2
  • This to me sounds like a very immature relationship. He sounds like he's still has that attitude where when he gets mad he just lashes out and is unresponsive about the problem. He needs to learn to deal with this type of stuff head on if he wants to be in a serious sucesfull relationship

    1|1
    0|0
    • I agree...but he gets so mad so easily, I don't know how to talk to him about this stuff.

    • Show All
    • So we've been together for about 2 years...should I just break it off if he doesn't change? Or what?

    • If you can't get him to start changing a little bit and don't see him making progress I would tell him you need a break. You need him to see how serious you are about wanting him to change this

  • What's going through his head is - not a lot. He's a douche.

    4|3
    0|1
  • He's thinking you took his cigs and weed... cardinal sin man, I'd be pissed off aswell, man needs a spliff to start the day

    0|0
    0|0
  • Weed is an illegal substance

    3|0
    2|1
  • he's mad at you, because it's something you did, and he doesn't know how to communicate it to you.

    2|1
    0|1
  • and why would you date a guy like that lmao?

    1|2
    0|1
  • I must admit I didn't bother to read all of your post but it is obvious tome that you love him and he loves you and that's that. Nothing else matter what happened was just a couple's quarrels. we all have that. God speed!

    0|1
    0|1
  • I agree with dixie

    "Me-"I'm sorry, are you honestly mad?"

    Him-"Yeah I am, I tried saying I love you and sh*t and you barely talked to me this morning""

    thats what's bothering him

    2|1
    0|1
    • So you don't think that it's all just him bein a jerk? And it is possible he does care?

    • Show All
    • Thanks so much!

    • Np :]

What Girls Said 8

  • All I can say is this is the perfect time for you to end this relationship. I don't care what context this is in, any guy that has the indecency to call his girlfriend an a**hole should be single. Indefinitely. You, and every girl on the planet, deserves more respect than this guy has shown you. Even if you have been with this guy for years, you need to step back and reevaluate what you want out of a relationship. You want someone who respects and treats you right. Correct? Then why even give this guy the time of day? You shouldn't. It doesn't matter if he was mad, tired, depressed, etc. Whatever was going through his mind wasn't in your best interest at all. He doesn't care. He isn't saying, "IDC" for no reason. He really does not care. If he cared, he would show you even the slightest respect and by the way he was speaking to you, he has no respect for you as a person let alone as his girlfriend. I say this out of respect for you, as someone who doesn't know you at all. Get yourself a new boyfriend, please. Respect yourself. He is not worth your time, emotion, or energy.

    Good luck!

    0|0
    0|0
  • I really don't mean to sound horrible, so many people have said it to me, I know it's horrible.

    He's being really insensitive and stubborn.

    I don't want to say "he doesn't love you" because this isn't shedding him in a good light! It is however showing he's impatient.

    I think you should back off completely...treat it as a break. He cannot and should not treat you like this, if you respond to it your saying "it's ok". I'm guilty of doing this. But in reality, you don't deserve this.There's no point taking the pain so just don't speak to him until he says sorry. In my experience, it takes about a day! :)

    Best of luck, sorry I couldn't be more helpful

    0|0
    0|0
  • He called you an a**hole? Ex-boyfriend, meet curb. GET RID OF HIM. He's immature and obviously has no respect for you. You know the old saying: You don't know what you got 'til it's gone. Give him something to think about.

    0|1
    0|0
  • I would break up with someone if they were treating me like this D:

    2|1
    0|1
  • Break up with him. He's a jerk.

    1|0
    0|1
  • Omg I can't be with someone like this.How can he used such rough words to you,his gf? Its so unappropriate.My ex told me to f*** off once and I broke up with him immediately.You should not wasting your time with someone like this.Its worthless.

    0|1
    0|1
    • I agree. It's just hard to leave, we've been together for so long.

    • if you have been with him for so long then he suppost to understand you better and respect you.Did he used to act this way before? If he was means he probably get used with his rough words as he thinks you don't take it serious or offense.

  • Sounds immature and like he's in need of a real life wake up call and a lesson on how to speak to the one he loves.

    0|1
    0|1
  • I couldn't be with someone who behaved that way towards me. He seems totally out of it, apathetic aboutrhe relationship, and blaming your for various things that didn't even make sense. It doesn't seem healthy.

    0|1
    0|1
Loading...